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Her heart sank. “I’m sorry. I spoke without thinking.” She had, but her heart tightened at his unemotional statement. It was hard to accept they were having an affair after what they’d shared over the last couple of days. Their relationship felt more real. She’d done things to Elijah, and with him, she’d never done before. Giving a man a come-hither invitation to her bed then undressing him was new to her. More than that, she’d touched Elijah, caressed him, and kissed him in places she’d never dreamed she’d have the nerve to.
She turned her back, putting her bowl and mug in the sink. “I’d really rather we not be the talk of the hospital so I’ll take the subway and see you in the ER.”
Elijah had moved to stand right behind her. “No.” His hands came to rest on her waist, bringing her back against him. He pushed her hair away, placing a kiss on her neck. “We’ll go by taxi. We can stop a block early if you don’t want us to be seen getting out of the same cab. We’ve shown up at work at the same time before, after all.”
She turned to face him. “I know you don’t care for talk and neither do I.”
He put a finger under her chin and raised it. “You do know people are going to talk, no matter what we do. We can’t control that. I hope you aren’t ashamed to be seen with me.”
Elijah looked so hurt that she cupped his face and kissed him. “Not at all. But if this is supposed to be short-lived between us, I don’t want you to be pegged as the bad guy and me the broken-hearted woman when it’s over, or vice-versa. Let’s just keep it between ourselves as much as possible.”
“Agreed.” He gave her a kiss that had her thinking about anything but what people would say about them.
As he’d suggested, they got out of the cab before getting to the hospital. Elijah didn’t try to hold her hand or touch her in any way as they approached the huge building.
Nerves got the better of her and she started to chatter. “I love this building. The nineteen-hundreds architecture is amazing. The stonework, the arches at the front.”
“I’ve never really thought about it. I’ve been coming here all my life.” Elijah was looking up. “Now you mention it, it is a nice building. My father used to bring Charles and me in with him on weekends when he was checking on things. The highlight was to go to the roof.” His voice sounded a little strained, as if he couldn’t believe he’d made that statement.
She looked up as well. “That sounds like fun. I bet you can see forever.”
“We thought it was a big deal. And, yes, the view is amazing.”
He didn’t offer to take her. Couples who were having an affair apparently didn’t do that sort of thing. It was more about going to bed. She wasn’t completely comfortable with the concept. After all, they had spent the day together yesterday as if they were a real couple.
They entered through the staff entrance. To anyone they would appear as two colleagues arriving at work at the same time. Helena stored her personal belongings in her locker while Elijah changed into scrubs. It wasn’t until they were ready to go that Elijah pulled her into his arms, giving her a kiss that promised more when they were alone again. “I just wanted you to remember me.”
Like there was a chance she wouldn’t. “You do know we work in the same department?”
“I’m afraid that I’m going to be far too aware of that today.” Elijah opened the door, letting her leave ahead of him.
One of the other ER doctors was just entering. He gave them both a curious look before Elijah said in an innocent voice, “Good morning.”
“Good morning,” the man as he continued into the room.
When they were down the hall far enough that Helena couldn’t be overheard, she said, “He gave us a funny look. Do you think he was the one who knocked?”
“Honey, he probably can tell just by looking at you you’ve just been thoroughly kissed.”
She stopped. “What?”
He chuckled, then leaned down and looked her in the eyes. “You do know you have a glow about you that every male within a mile would recognize as a woman who has been satisfied?”
Heat rose in her. “I do not!”
“If you don’t, then I’ve not been doing my job. Are you saying I haven’t?” He gave her a look that implied that if she didn’t answer correctly they would return to the on-call room.
She gave him a shy grin. “No, I wouldn’t say that at all.”
A self-satisfied smile came over his face. “That’s what I thought.”
“On that note, and so I don’t feed your ego further, I’m going to work. See you around, Dr. Davenport.”
She held her head high as she continued down the hall, with Elijah’s low chortle following her.
* * *
The rest of the day consisted of a steady stream of patients. Nothing difficult or out of the ordinary. She passed Elijah a couple of times and each time he winked at her. She tried not to react but regardless of her efforts a tingle of awareness ran through her. Then despair swamped her. She was getting in deeper and deeper.
Their shift was about to end when she sat down at the unit desk. Lauren said, “Dr. Davenport said to let you know he needs to see you in the office when you have a moment.”
“Great. And this is one of the few times I’ve gotten to sit down all day.” Helena pushed her way out of the chair. “Off to see the boss.”
The secretary smiled then turned her attention back to the computer screen.
With a flutter that felt like a thousand wings in her stomach, Helena knocked on the inconspicuous door that concealed the ER chief’s office. What did Elijah want? At his muffled, “Come in,” she opened the door.
“Hey, I was told you wanted to see me.”
Elijah sat behind a metal desk piled high with papers and magazines. He immediately stood and came toward her. “Close the door.”
It had hardly clicked shut before Elijah had her in his arms. One of his hands cupped her behind, bringing her intimately against him, before his hungry mouth met hers. A long, very delicious minute later his lips left hers. “I’ve been wanting to do that every time I saw you today.”
“I’m glad you didn’t,” she said, a little breathless. She pushed against his chest, putting space between them. “I hope you called me in here for more than a kiss.”
Elijah looked around the tiny room where there was nothing more than one uncomfortable chair and the desk. “I only wish. I wanted to let you know I’m working over tonight.”
“I appreciate you telling me but you know you don’t have to explain your life to me.” It wasn’t like they were a couple. He’d made that clear this morning.
Hurt appeared in his eyes for a second. “I realize that but I thought you might wonder what happened to me.”
He sounded a little disappointed. Was he downcast because she was acting as if it didn’t matter to her that they wouldn’t be seeing each other that evening? “Thanks for letting me know. I would’ve wondered.”
Elijah looked pleased with her response. His desk phone rang and he nodded its direction. “I need to get this.”
“Okay. I’ll see you later.”
Elijah’s attention was already focused on the conversation over the phone by the time she opened the door.
An hour later, Helena was putting the finishing remarks on the chart for her last patient for the day when laughter drew her attention. She looked down the hall to see a young nurse who was new to the ER and Elijah standing close. He was holding a chart and the nurse had one of her hands on his forearm. A sour taste rose in Helena’s throat. It looked like they were having a cozy conversation. Was the nurse why Elijah was working late? Was he already looking for his next fling participant?
His look met hers for a second, held. There was a question there. Bewilderment? Concern?
Helena had seen enough. Quickly
finishing her charting, she said goodbye to Lauren and headed to the locker room. Why had she ever believed she could have an affair with Elijah and not become emotionally engaged? Already she couldn’t handle another woman speaking to him. What had made her think she’d be able to let him go when the time came?
Entering the room, she quickly pulled her belongings from her locker and made her way out the side door of the hospital into the cold night air. The blast felt good, helping to clear her mind. All she wanted to do was go home, curl up in her warm bed and sleep, if she could. Her fear was that all she was going to do was miss being in Elijah’s arms.
* * *
For the third time, Elijah listened to the phone ring through to voicemail. Helena should pick up regardless of the late hour. Was she not doing so because it was his number calling?
He tried her number again. Relief washed over him when her sleepy voice said, “Dr. Tate.”
“Helena, it’s Elijah.”
“Is something wrong? Where are you?” Her voice cleared some.
“Outside your door. Let me in,” he answered impatiently.
