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“Her husband never gave her what she needed.”
“She told you that?”
“Yes. There was so much more to her than he ever saw. He wanted her to just be this complacent wife. But she was a pistol with fire inside. The husband was apparently a good, hard-working man, but he didn’t get her, and he wasn’t… affectionate.”
“And you were…affectionate? That doesn’t sound like you at all.”
“Maybe adventurous is a better term. I gave her what she needed. You really want me to spell out what that means?”
“No. Spare me. Please.”
“What we had was very passionate—sometimes volatile. In the end, she decided she wanted to save her marriage for the sake of her children. That was when things ended between us. But apparently, from what you’re telling me, that didn’t work out for her after all. I assume any trust that was broken couldn’t be repaired. I’m sorry for any part I played in disrupting her family structure, but I don’t regret our affair. It was one of the most memorable times of my life. I still think of her from time to time, and that’s rare for me.”
“I don’t even know what to say. I want to be mad at you, but I suppose you couldn’t have known I would meet and fall for her daughter someday.”
“I certainly didn’t.”
“This is so bad. Bianca and I promised each other that there would be no more secrets. How am I supposed to tell her that her mother is not exactly the saint she thought she was? How do you tell someone that their entire view of their childhood is wrong?”
My father seemed to ponder my question then said, “Okay, listen. Now you may not agree with what I’m about to say, but I’m going to say it anyway.”
“What?”
“I think sometimes in life there are exceptions to the ‘honesty is the best policy’ rule. In a case like this, no one stands to gain anything from your telling her what you know. Think about it, Dex. What happens if you tell her and Eleni denies it? What then?”
I challenged him. “Or to the contrary, when Eleni finds out who I am…what if she confesses everything to her daughter anyway?”
“Then you play dumb. No one needs to know we had this conversation. I’m certainly not going to tell anyone.”
“I don’t know. I really don’t think I can keep this from her.”
“It’s one thing to tell the truth when it’s for someone’s own good. But nothing good can come from this. All I’m saying is to think about it. Don’t rush into anything. There is no logical reason to drop this kind of a bomb now. It’s been so many years. Leave it alone. That’s my very strong suggestion. If Eleni wants to come clean, let her. But it’s not your responsibility to explain.”
Staring up at a plane flying overhead, I said, “I am going to have to really think about this.”
“Try not to stress yourself out. Life is too short. I’m learning that more and more every day as I see friends dropping dead from heart attacks left and right.” He stood up from the rock and kicked the sand off his feet. “Come on. How about a game of golf?”Carving the giraffe’s neck wasn’t easy. I followed as closely along as I could while Jelani demonstrated the correct movements of the knife as we sat under the lamplight in his basement. My mind just wasn’t in it today.
After only one night in Florida, I’d flown back just in time for my weekly whittling session at his Brooklyn apartment. While Jelani’s lessons were always a quiet, meditative experience, spending time here also made me feel like I was contributing to society by looking after him.
Jelani never complained, but I knew his cancer treatments were wearing on him. He mostly stayed home aside from setting up shop at the Brooklyn Flea on weekends. He also had very few family members who checked in on him. A nephew took him to his appointments but sometimes had to cancel. I insisted he call me the next time that happened. While he wouldn’t take any money from me, I was prepared to pay for whatever he needed if he’d let me.
“How are you feeling?” I asked.
“I have to push through. If I let myself dwell on it, I’ll feel sicker. It’s part of why I ask you to come here. Watching you attempt to carve is like pulling teeth, but it gets my mind off things. The mind has incredible power over the body. Speaking of which, tell me what’s on your mind.”
“You can tell something is on my mind?”
“You’ve whittled the giraffe’s neck so thin, it looks like a pencil. You’re not concentrating today.”
I chuckled. “You got me.”
“So, tell me. What is it? Does it have to do with the Greek goddess?”
