Page 41 of Dirty Letters


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“You thought about it because being around me makes you think of sex.” He wriggled his brows. “You imagined us both naked in broad daylight fucking against that wall over there. Am I right?”

I gulped.

Well, I wasn’t before. But now I certainly am imagining that!

“Jesus, Luca. You’re turning red. Did that turn you on, babe?”

“A little.”

“Just a little?”

“Maybe more than a little.”

“You’re so fucking adorable.” He leaned in and whispered in my ear. The heat of his breath gave me goosebumps when he said, “That reminds me. I need to collect my prize, don’t I?”

I got chills. “Where are you going to kiss me?”

“Well, there really is no wrong choice here. I’d love to kiss any part of you that you’d let me. But given that you’ve made it clear we won’t be taking things too far tonight, I should probably ask you what my options are first.”

I wanted him to kiss me everywhere, but I knew opening up the “options” could lead to things I wasn’t ready for. “Can I think about it?”

“Of course. And if you don’t want me to kiss you again tonight, you can just tell me. I can take a rain check for my prize—because I do really hope to see you again. I wish to God you could stay longer than just one day.”

I thought about that. Honestly, if I could have stayed longer . . . how much would I even be able to blend in to his life here? Pretty sure the answer was: not at all.

He must have noticed the look of worry on my face. “What’s wrong, Luca? Talk to me. I’m still the guy you can tell anything to, despite all this ostentatious crap you see around you right now. Ignore all that, and tell me what’s on your mind.”

After a few seconds of silence, I looked into his eyes. “How could this ever possibly work, Griffin?”

He took my hand in his. “Crazier things have happened. For one, I’ve been in a relationship with pieces of fucking paper and words for the past several weeks. They were my only window into your soul. And you know what? They made me happier than I have been in a very long time, even with just the letters and nothing more.”

“But now, we can’t ever go back to that, can’t ever go back to what we had. You deserve more than some woman who can hardly leave her house except to go food shopping in the middle of the night. It’s only a matter of time before you figure out that there is no way for this to realistically work. You don’t realize how limited I am.”

He stared off in thought. When he looked into my eyes again, he asked, “Will you do me a favor?”

“Yes.”

“Can you put all of the reasons we’re wrong for each other on hold for one night and just be with me? Because while you’re worrying about the future, I can’t stop thinking about how damn lucky I am that my dream girl drove all the way across the country to see me—the real me. I’m on a high right now that you can’t even imagine, Luca. And while you’re sitting here trying to convince me that it could never work between us, all I can think about is whether you taste as good as you fucking make me feel.” He squeezed my hand. “Can you do that? Can you just be with me and fuck the rest for a little while?”

How can I say no to that?

My eyes were watering. “Yeah. I can do that.”

“Good.” He stood up. “How about I show you around a little bit?”

“I’d love that.”

Griffin gave me the grand tour of his massive house. One of the stops was the downstairs home theater that featured several rows of plush seats along with a popcorn machine.

We plopped ourselves down into two of the seats.

He rubbed his hand along the arm of the velour chair. “I have this great theater that I don’t even use. When I do watch movies, it’s usually alone at night in my room after a long day at the studio. I can’t remember the last time I watched something down here.”

“That seems like such a waste.”

“Yeah . . . well, this room is made for more than one person, and when you can’t even count on one hand the number of people you trust, well, it’s kind of hard to fill a theater.” He shook his head, seeming to catch himself getting into serious territory. “I’ll tell you one thing, though, Ryan . . . when they make a fucking movie out of one of your books, you’d better damn well bet I’ll be screening it down here.”

That made me smile.

Next, he took me upstairs and showed me the bedrooms. There were five in total. The one at the end of the hallway was his—the master.

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