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Dress rehearsal wasn’t a complete disaster. Though I was ready to strangle Katelyn Lawson by the end of it. She had taken every opportunity to insert herself where she didn’t belong. If she did that tonight, during opening night, then I was going to personally kick her out of the pre-professional company. I really didn’t know how Kathy had dealt with her. If anyone acted like that at the School of American Ballet, they would be sent home. No questions asked.
Luckily, I hadn’t heard a peep from her as we got ready for curtain rise. Nick had, thankfully, agreed to speak to the crowd. I had no interest in public speaking again, and our executive director was charismatic as hell. Let him work his magic while I stayed backstage.
“All set, Peyton,” Cassidy said with a head nod.
“Good. Drosselmeyer is in position?”
Cassidy listened into her headset. “Yes, we’re ready. Ten minutes.”
A whispered chorus of, “Ten minutes,” rang out to the other dancers.
A smile came to my face. At least all of this felt familiar. I stepped into the backstage area, crowded with young dancers in long dresses and suits and a few lonely mice, chatting excitedly.
A hand tapped my tights. “Miss Peyton?”
I turned in surprise to find the tiniest little mouse of them all. I knelt down before her. “What can I do for you, Aly?”
Her mouse head was off, and she had a furrow in her brow. “I don’t think that I can do this.”
I raised an eyebrow in surprise. “Why not? You’ve been wonderful in rehearsals.”
“But this isn’t rehearsal. This is the show!” she answered emphatically, as if that made a difference. “There are people out there, watching. What if it’s not perfect?”
“Want to know a secret?”
Aly nodded.
“No one is perfect. Not even me.”
“Yeah, but—”
“I messed up onstage once, and you know what I did?”
She shook her head.
“I went back out onstage, and I did it right the next time. The only way we get better is to keep trying…even if it’s not perfect.”
Aly sighed heavily with all the drama of a five-year-old. “But I don’t want to mess up.”
“Let me show you something.” I stood and held my hand out, which she took easily. I stepped back through the door that led to the wings.
The professional company stood in clusters, stretching and practicing particularly difficult turns to warm up. They all grinned as I walked a small mouse through them. A few even waved at Aly and said her name reassuringly. Distraction was also a good method, and Aly was well loved among the company.
I stopped right at the corner of the curtain. I held my finger to my mouth, and Aly nodded solemnly. Then, I pulled the curtain aside, barely an inch, so that we could both see out to the awaiting crowd.
And it was packed. My heart lurched with excitement and a flutter of nerves. Even the greatest dancers in the world got pre-show jitters. Which was why I didn’t blame Aly at all. This was her first real show. I couldn’t even remember mine, but I was sure that I’d been nervous.
“When I was a little girl, almost as young as you, I had stage fright, too.”
Aly’s eyes widened. “You?”
I put my finger to my mouth again and tried not to laugh. Her whisper hadn’t quite been a whisper. “My favorite dance teacher told me, when I got nervous, I should look to this special place in the audience, and it would make me feel better.”
“There’s a special place to look?” she asked in awe.
I nodded and pointed. “You see that spot where you look up, right past the bottom level of seating, but not up to the balconies? It’s a black spot, where they direct the music.”
“I see it,” she said in excitement.
“That’s where you look, and poof, nerves go away.” I let the curtain fall shut. “So, when you’re onstage, if you get nervous, then you just find that spot, and everything will clear right up.”
“Wow,” Aly said with wide-eyed adoration. “Thank you, Miss Peyton.”
Then, with a grin, she darted away. I could hear her giggling with her friends from here until a stage parent shushed them. I just laughed softly and went back to Cassidy.
“You’re so good with her,” Cassidy said.
I flushed and was glad she couldn’t see it with the dark lighting and pound of makeup on my face. “There’s always someone who’s nervous before the first show.”
“Well, I thought it was adorable. Isaac would be happy to know you’re looking after his baby.”
I blushed an even deeper, darker red.
“That’s Nick’s cue,” Cassidy said after listening to her headset a moment.
I cleared my throat, putting the thought of Aly and Isaac out of my head. “Everyone, to your places. Quickly.”
Then, the performance began in a flurry of rushing dancers preparing to take flight. The curtain rose, Drosselmeyer took stage in his workshop, and we were off. Cassidy handled the stage while I did final directions for the dancers until it was my time to perform the pas de deux.
