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“Neither do you,” I answer dryly.
“Yeah.”
“I’ll come this week.”
“Monday or Tuesday.”
Confused why he’s so adamant about those days, I open my mouth. Before I get the question out, he’s standing and signaling the guard that he’s ready to return.
I hate this. Hate it.
Dear Rock,
After I left today, Teller and I drove Heidi to school. It was a cloudy, overcast day for an outdoor June graduation. Somehow it seemed fitting though.
Heidi was quiet the whole way. Her silence made me question whether it had been a good idea to bring her to the jail. But when we got to the school, she gave me a fierce hug and thanked me for letting her see you.
Everyone met us there. The club took up three rows of seats, which seemed to please Heidi.
During the ceremony, so much anger overwhelmed me. Anger that you were being denied this event with your family.
Afterward, Heidi couldn’t wait to leave. She very earnestly explained to me that two of the girls in her class had teased her about being an orphan for years, so having the club there meant so much to her. It took all my strength not to cry.
Now that she finally has her learner’s permit, the club (i.e. Murphy) got her a car. It’s a cute little thing, Murphy described as a mix of hatchback, SUV and sports car. I asked him why he didn’t get me one instead of my old lady Subaru and he got all flustered. I felt bad and spent a good ten minutes assuring him I was only kidding.
More family stuff you missed. And I got angry again.
Because of the weather we moved the “cookout” inside. Afterward, Heidi and Axel left to hang out with her friends. I actually think they left to be with each other, but I kept that hunch to myself. I think Teller’s given up hope that her virginity boat is still on dry land, and I’m keeping my nose out of it.
I went through a lot of emotions today. But there’s one thing I never was—lonely. And that’s because of you and the family you’ve given me. I don’t think I could survive this without them. The brotherhood that you and the others have fought so hard to create is vibrant and alive.
I miss you terribly and you’re in my every thought.
Love,
Hope
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
As usual, per Rock’s instructions, Wrath and I arrive at the jail promptly at eight. We’re so early the front door hasn’t been unlocked yet. The guard who opens it isn’t familiar to me, but waves us inside.
“Attorney Hope Kendall here to see my client, Rochlan North,” I pull out my identification and motion for Wrath to do the same. One of the guards leaves to get Rock, while the other one studies my credentials.
“You ain’t his attorney. He’s got that high-priced suit.”
I’d been afraid of this. “Yes, I’m working of counsel to Mr. Glassman.” This isn’t a lie. I’ve provided Glassman with a lot of research and memos of law on a number of topics. None of those required me to visit with Rock, but that’s not something I need to share.
To my astonishment, he looks up Glassman’s number and calls him to verify my story. With wide eyes, I turn and stare at Wrath. His blank face does nothing to stop my palms from going slick.
Glassman—or someone at the firm—thankfully acknowledges that yes, I am of counsel to Mr. Glassman—not the firm, only Mr. Glassman. Only for this case. Big help, thanks so much.
The guard glares at me and I can’t fathom what I’ve done to irritate this man so much. It bothers me on a few levels. I’ve always tried to be kind and professional when interacting with anyone—law enforcement, client, adversary—until they give me a reason not to. Here, I’m not sure what will work and what might piss this guy off and bar me from seeing Rock. I work a casually flirtatious smile onto my face. “Is everything okay?”
“You’re clear to go. But he—” he says with a jab of his finger in Wrath’s direction while walking around to my side “—has to stay out here.”
A rush of fear burns beneath my skin. Somehow I manage to answer calmly and professionally. “Why, officer? He’s my assistant. He’s accompanied me before.”
His face transforms from asshole-blocking-me-from-seeing-my-man to something much more sinister. “Assistant my ass. I know you’re North’s bitch. That’s what those MC boys do. Get their ol’ ladies to do their dirty work. For a lawyer you’re awfully stupid,” he hisses in my ear.
My whole life I’ve tended to stick my foot in my mouth when I’m flustered. So it takes a second to bite back the “Can I speak to your supervisor?” request forming on my tongue.
This problem isn’t going to be solved with bureaucratic complaint filing. If I make a fuss, Rock will be the one to suffer for it.
“Are you denying my visit as well?” I ask as calmly as possible.
In the minute he takes to think it over, fear wraps its cold arms around my middle, squeezing tight.
“Nah, come on through the metal detector.” He motions me with his hand and a chilling smile.
The buzzer goes off on my first try. He makes me take my shoes off and walk through again. I know it’s the underwire in my bra setting it off but I’m too afraid to draw attention to any part of my body. Any time this has happened to me at the courthouse, the officers have just used their wand over me and let me go. I’m a lawyer for God’s sake. Not a threat.
But this man—Officer Izzard his badge says—wears a sadistic smile when the buzzer goes off again.
“Step over here, miss.” He points. “Palms against the wall.”
This time I can’t keep my mouth shut. “You’re going to frisk me? Shouldn’t a female guard do this?”
He leans in close, stale coffee breath assaulting my nostrils. “No. You wanna see your man, this is the only way. I can’t have you smuggling contraband in.”
“I’m not, I wouldn’t.” My pointless protest seems to amuse him. This has nothing to do with safety and everything to do with humiliating and degrading me. My need to see Rock rises to overwhelming proportions.
“Hope, what’s going on?” Wrath calls out.
Rock’s powerless and at the mercy of this sadistic asshole inside these walls. I need to see him and make sure he’s unhurt. “I’m okay.” But by the tone of my voice it’s obvious I’m anything but okay.
My palms press into the cold, scratchy cinderblock.
He pats me down professionally—at first.
“Get your fucking hands off her, you piece of shit!” Wrath yells from the other side.
The groping stops. “Sit down and shut the fuck up, or I got a cell you can park your ass in for a few days.”
“Hope. Forget it. Let’s go.”
“I’m okay,” I repeat. I’mokayI’mokayI’mokay I keep saying in my head until the words blend together in a senseless mush.
The guard’s hands return to my hips, slithering down my legs, his fingers brush against my ankles and I fight the urge to scream. A different kind of fear takes hold as his hands travel back up my body, under my sweater, tickling my stomach, grazing the undersides of my breasts, tracing the bottom of my bra. Chilling, sweaty fear paralyzes me.
“Izzard!” Someone calls out from around the corner.
His slimy touch vanishes. “Keep your mouth shut, or I’ll fuck your man up after you leave,” he growls in my ear.
I nod once to indicate I understand his threat. My mouth can’t form any words.
Humiliation and terror still crawl over my skin as he leads me into the visitation room.
Rock stands. Anger radiates from every part of him when he sees Izzard at my back.
“Have a nice visit,” he says before leaving.
As soon as he’s gone, I collapse into the seat on my side of the table. “Hope, are you okay?”
Chin up. “I’m fine. How are you?”
“Where’s Wrath?”
“He’s, um in the waiting room. They wouldn’t let him in with me today.”
“Why?”
r /> I shrug. Lying to the man I love adds insult to the hideous thing that just happened outside, but I can’t tell him this. Not now when he’s so vulnerable.
Later.
Later I’ll tell him everything.
Because I know in my heart Rock will be the one to solve this problem. His way. And much to my self-horror, that’s the only thought that gives me comfort.
Knowing that slimy motherfucker put his hands on Hope tested every single bit of my willpower. Violating and disrespecting her won’t go unpunished.
I’ll make sure of it.
I should have gotten Hope out of there the second that weasel picked up the phone to call Glassman’s office. It’s on me that she got hurt.
Waiting for her to return is torture.
Izzard—you bet your ass I got that fucker’s name memorized—sits behind the window with his feet up on the counter.
Cocksucker.
Hope seems less rattled when she returns. Until the guard calls out to her. “Have a nice afternoon, Miss Kendall. See you again soon.”
She doesn’t turn or hesitate, just heads for the door.
When we’re in the truck she stares straight ahead and doesn’t say a word.
“Tell me everything now. I know he frisked you, but I couldn’t see—”
“Wrath, please—”
“I need to know.”
She lets out a long sigh and I think it’s better that we’re in the car so we don’t have to look at each other when she gives me the details of how he fucking felt her up. All my anger threatens to boil over when I think of this sweet, innocent woman being manhandled by that dirty piece of shit.
“I’m so sorry.”
“It’s not your fault,” she answers softly. “I’m just so thankful you were there so something worse didn’t happen.”
I don’t know what to say. I’m supposed to be protecting her. I failed, and she’s thanking me. “We’ll take care of him. Believe it.”
“I don’t—”
“Retaliation is what we do, Hope. How he disrespected you? The president’s ol’ lady. It’s an insult to the entire club.” It’s more than that though. I can’t look at her anymore and not see her as a little sister.
“I know,” she whispers.
We’re silent for a few more miles. Then I ask what’s weighing on me. I hate that I couldn’t see Rock. There are a thousand signals I could have picked up from him to give me a hint of how to handle this guard. “How was he?”
“Okay.” Out of the corner of my eye, I see her shaking her head. “No. Something’s wrong, Wrath. I’m scared. That guard. This wasn’t random. Rock was furious when he saw who escorted me back there. He asked me all sorts of questions. He knew something bad happened. But I couldn’t tell him. I can’t have him get in trouble—”
As much as I hate saying it, “You did the right thing.”
“How can we leave him there?”
“Rock can handle himself, sweetheart.” I’m amazed at how calm and rational my voice comes out, since I feel anything but. I’m ready to blow that fucking place up if that’s what it takes to get Rock out. “When’s his next bail hearing?”
“Thursday.”
“Good. You focus your energy on helping Glassman with that. The club will handle the guard.”
“Okay.”
She doesn’t protest. Doesn’t suggest we file a complaint or contact Glassman. The fact that she’s put all her trust in the club to solve this, punches me in the gut with a number of mixed feelings.
Trinity meets us in the living room when we get home. “Everything okay? How’s Rock?”
Hope glances at me before answering. Shit. I don’t want to lie to Trinity, but I don’t want to upset her either. “There were some issues, but we’re handling it.”
She looks to Hope who just nods and takes Trinity’s hand. “I need to go upstairs. Can we talk later?”
“Of course.”
After Hope leaves, Trinity swings her curious gaze my way. Christ, those beautiful honey eyes hypnotize me. “What happened?”
“Nothing, babe. I need to call the guys in for church. Can you help me with that?”
She folds her arms and cocks her head. “Is Rock okay?”
“Yeah. Hope saw him.”
The phone call I’d been expecting since we left the jail comes in just as Trinity’s about to ask more questions.
“I’ll get the guys,” she whispers as I answer the phone.
“Will you accept the charges—”
“Yes,” I snap at the automated question.
“What the fuck happened?” Rock asks in a controlled voice. I know he’s got no privacy, so he’ll watch what he says.
I can’t tell him that piece of shit put his hands on Hope. Rock hears that, he’ll lose it and kill the guy. Then there’ll be no chance in hell of getting him free. “That fucking guard wouldn’t let me in. What’s going on? Is he messing with you?”
He sighs. “Nothing I can’t handle. But that’s it for her. No more visits. Tell the rest of the guys.”
“I’m calling everyone in for church right now.”
“Good. But no action on this. This one’s mine when I get out.”
We’ll see about that. Technically, Rock has no vote while he’s incarcerated. The club’s so tight, that we’ll honor Rock’s orders for now. But if this gets worse—we may take a vote to handle the guard on our own and suffer Rock’s anger later. Either way, I’m letting everyone know now.
“Hope said Thursday’s the next hearing?”
“Yeah. Glassman wants her there to testify. I want you and Z with her. But stay outside the courtroom.”
“You got it.”
“I didn’t get to ask her, everyone okay?”
Christ, my brother’s going through God only knows what and he’s worried about us. “We’re fine.”
“How’s Trinity?”
“Okay. Hope and I didn’t say anything. I didn’t want to upset her.”
“Yeah. Don’t.”
We’re cut off before we finish, and I wish Rock would let me get a burner cell to him. But he’s stuck on the idea of doing everything by the book, so he can get the fuck out as soon as he’s cleared.
I guess I don’t blame him.
The somber mood of each brother doesn’t improve my attitude one bit. Z and I have refused to take Rock’s seat, so it sits there empty. A grim reminder of why we’re all here this afternoon.
Once everyone’s seated, I get right down to the meat of this session. “Went to see Rock today. Guard there—” Shit I’m still so fucking pissed I can’t say the words. “Threw attitude at me and Hope. Made things difficult and wouldn’t let me see Rock.” Guys grumble at that and I haven’t even gotten to the worst of it. “When she couldn’t get through the metal detector without setting it off, he—” my jaw’s so fucking tight I don’t know if I can get the words out. The room’s silent, everyone waiting. “He used a pat down as an excuse to feel her up. She wouldn’t give me a lot of details, but—”
Murphy, surprisingly is the first one out of his chair. “He’s dead. No fucking—”
“Easy, brother.”
Z’s staring at me with a slack jaw and some serious fury building in his eyes. Shit, one glance around the table and it’s clear everyone shares Murphy’s opinion.
“I spoke to Rock right before coming in here. He doesn’t know what happened to her. But I got the impression he’s having issues with this asshole aside from today. He wants to handle it when he gets out.”
“Fuck that,” Dex barks out. “No one gets away with hurting her. And we can’t let him have free rein on our prez either.”
“Break his hands,” Teller says. Murmurs of approval go around the room. “Retribution should fit the deed. He put his hands on her. We cripple his hands.”
Murphy picks up Teller’s train of thought. “Side benefits, he’s out of work for a few months but still alive for Rock to deal with when he gets out.”
> “Blanket party,” Ravage shouts and I shake my head. A blanket over the fuck’s head and a beating in a back alley might actually end up being how we take care of this.
“Let’s vote,” I ask.
“Do it,” Z says.
Everyone else is in favor too.
I settle into my chair so we can discuss details. “We can’t have this look like it’s connected to Rock in any way.”
Z nods. “Needs to happen away from the jail.”
“He’s met you,” Murphy points out. “You probably shouldn’t go.”
“Fuck that.”
He holds up his hands. “Just sayin’.”
I hate that he’s right.
Z jots down the little bit I know about Izzard. In a few days this guy will no longer be a threat.
Dear Rock,
My hands are still shaking as I write this. I couldn’t tell you what happened today. I’ve never been so scared in my entire life. Not for myself. For you. I’ve been so worried that a rival MC member or some gang member would harm you inside. Even though I know better, this situation hadn’t occurred to me. I’m more terrified than ever thinking of you unable to fight back, because I know you won’t do anything to jeopardize getting out as soon as you can.
He threatened to hurt you if I said anything. But that’s not why I didn’t tell you. I knew if I told you what he did. The way he spoke to me. The way he put his hands on me. You’d kill him.
I knew this because the thought of him hurting you made me want to go back to the jail tonight, follow him to his house and shoot him without a hint of remorse.
The only reason I endured his foulness was to see you. The knowledge that either you or the club would punish him when the time was right gave me strength. I fully understand now why you say an insult to one is an insult to the entire club. I think Wrath was as angry as you would have been. I know he feels like he failed me. But he didn’t. He did the right thing.
I love you and need you back where I know you’re safe.
Love,
Hope
I knew something was wrong the minute I saw Hope.
Lizard escorting her into the room brought all the rage I’ve been stuffing down to the surface.
