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Astonished, she started to stand and then sat back down. “Did you know that when you rented it?”
He shook his head. “I hoped. I didn’t know. It wasn’t until I arrived today and saw the small wood sign hung on the back door, Cray Cabin, that I was sure.”
“Does the cabin feel familiar? Do you recognize anything being here?”
“No. I hoped I would, but nothing resonates.”
She knotted her hands, hearing his disappointment. He so badly wanted a memory…something to tie him to his mother and his brothers…to the past he’d lost…
“Why don’t you reach out to Brock?” she asked. “Tell him who you are and what you know. Maybe he’ll remember something. What is the age difference between you?”
“He was born in 1975. He’s seven years older.”
“So he could remember his mother taking you all to the cabin and then leaving them to go see you.”
“Or he could just think she’d gone for groceries.”
“At seven, yes, but you said this went on throughout your childhood…for four years…? By eleven he had to suspect something.”
Shane stopped pacing and shoved a hand through his dark long hair, pushing it from his forehead. “I’d hoped,” he said, his voice pitched low.
She felt his anguish and the critical words that had rushed to her lips disappeared.
How could she criticize when he’d struggled and suffered so much as a child? How could she second-guess his decisions when he’d pieced this much together on his own? There had never been anyone there for him, not after his grandmother’s death, and she saw for the first time why he was really here, in Montana.
Not for a murder investigation.
He’d come to find his family.
He’d come to find himself.
Her eyes burned and she drew a deep breath to ease the aching in her chest. He’d probably come hoping to discover that he belonged. Carefully, and as gently as possible, she said, “Shane, they can’t accept you if they don’t know who you are.”
His broad shoulders shifted, a careless dismissal, and then he walked out of the cabin, out through the front door, into the night, letting the old door bang behind him.
She was right.
Jet was absolutely right.
And yet nothing ever quite worked the way one expected.
He’d come to Crawford County with hopes—high hopes—and in the past nine months he’d learned all over again that expectations were bound to lead to disappointment.
To be honest, he hadn’t even thought he had any expectations when he arrived late last March looking for a place to live.
He’d told himself he wasn’t attached to this family, or even the outcome of meeting them. He wasn’t a Sheenan. He wasn’t part of them. All he wanted were facts. Information. He just wanted to understand why he’d been given away. That was all.
But it wasn’t true.
It was a lie he’d told himself. The Douglas story was just an excuse to come to Montana. The real reason he was here was to unravel his past.
And he’d nearly done that now. Nearly, but not quite.
The door opened and closed, he didn’t turn around, not wanting Jet to see how raw he was…how frustrated he remained. He’d come to terms with his mother. But he still didn’t know what to do about his father or brothers.
The father was gone. Dead. But the five brothers? They were very much alive.
Chapter Twelve
Shane made dinner—a simple chicken and pasta dish—with groceries he’d picked up at the market earlier in the day. They had wine and salad, too, and it was all tasty and satisfying, but Shane was distracted during the meal, and Jet didn’t press him for conversation. To be honest, she welcomed the quiet, needing to process everything she was learning about him, and the Sheenans.
Jet had come to know Brock as well as anyone not in his inner circle, but she couldn’t imagine how Harley’s husband would react when confronted with the news that he had a missing brother. Was it something he’d known or suspected? Or had Catherine managed to keep it a secret from everyone?
Either way, Jet hoped Brock would be positive and welcoming. It would be important because as the eldest, he also wielded the most authority, but as a loner, Brock might not be pleased to have Shane on his doorstep.
At bedtime, Jet very much wanted to spend the night with Shane. She didn’t want to sleep alone, not when he was so close by, but when their goodnight kiss became sinfully hot, Shane drew back, again demonstrating tremendous control.
“This is exactly how mistakes get made,” he said, his deep voice pitched low, regret in the husky tone. “I want you so much, babe. You have to know that.”
“I do.”
“Then we have to hold off until it’s right.”
She tried to smile but failed. “You are seriously disciplined.”
“You’ll thank me later.”
“Will I?”
“That serious discipline will pay off nicely in bed.”
Her eyebrows lifted. “Oooh. Sounds interesting.”
“Even better, it feels so good.”
Harley called Jet the next morning while they were having breakfast at a cute little restaurant in downtown Cherry Lake. “This has gone on long enough,” Harley said wearily. “Everyone’s upset. It can’t continue—”
“What’s happened now?”
“What do you think has happened? Jet, you’re staying at the Sheenan family cabin in Cherry Lake, and it’s seriously disturbing. First the ranch house and now the Cray cabin!”
Jet slid out of the restaurant booth and stepped outside to finish the call. “How did you find out?”
“The booking form. I get copied in on reservations after the property manager accepts payments.”
“This isn’t our issue, Harley. We have to let Shane and the Sheenans sort this out, and none of you have even given him a chance.”
“Oh, I think he’s had plenty of chances, but booking the Cray cabin without telling anyone who he was? Staying at another Sheenan property when he’s been given notice to vacate the ranch house?”
“He paid to stay.”
“That’s not the point, Jet, and I don’t have the energy to do this with you now. I’ve been up all night with the baby. He’s having night terrors again, and I’m so tired. Tired of having to defend you. Tired of taking heat for you. I can’t do it anymore.”
“Then don’t. I can take care of myself.”
“Right.”
“I can.”
“So what is the deal with you and Sean Shane Finley? Are you sleeping together?”
“That’s none of your business.”
“So you are.”
“No. Not yet. But hopefully soon.”
“Oh, Jet.” Harley’s sigh was heavy across the phone line. “I promised Mom and Dad I’d protect you.”
“I’m almost twenty-five, Harley. You guys have to let me grow up.”
“We love you.”
“And I love you, and Mom, and Dad. But at my age, Harley, you were already married and a new mother. Let me do what I need to do.” When Harley didn’t answer, Jet added, “But I think this is less about me than it is about Shane.”
More silence.
Jet drew a slow breath. “I love him, Harley.”
“You only met two weeks ago!”
“Give him a chance.”
“I can’t.” Harley’s voice cracked. “The guys are at the ranch house now, packing up his stuff. They’re throwing him out. Jet, it’s over. He’s gone. When you guys come back today, he’s being chased out of town.”
Shane knew something was wrong when Jet left the table, but her expression when she returned was nothing short of heartbroken. “That was Harley,” she said huskily, sliding back into their booth.
He hated seeing her so upset. He hated how she was still in the middle. It wasn’t fair to her. It never was. He blamed himself for starting this, but knowing her now, knowing how she made him f
eel, he’d do it all over again, given the chance. “I gathered.”
Her hand shook as she reached for her coffee cup. “They don’t want you back.”
She gulped the coffee. His coffee had cooled so hers must be lukewarm at best with all the cream she’d added to it. She took another quick drink, and then another.
“That’s nothing new,” he said calmly, trying to soothe her.
“But they’re at the house now, packing your things.” Her coffee sloshed as she set her cup down. She looked up at him and there were tears in her eyes. “They’re kicking you out.” The tears were falling now, one after the other. “It makes me so upset…makes me hate them.” She was dashing away the tears but she couldn’t catch them. “And it makes me so upset with you, too. You are so stubborn. You didn’t have to let it play out this way. You could have told them, Shane. You could have done something before it came to this. It didn’t have to be so ugly—” She broke off, and grabbed her purse and walked out.
He watched her go, his gut churning. He hated drama and intense emotion as it made him so uncomfortable, but Jet’s emotions were different. She wasn’t trying to make him feel bad. This wasn’t about shaming him or punishing him. She was upset for him, and upset with him because he hadn’t done enough to avoid the conflict.
He quickly dropped bills on the table to pay for their breakfast and then followed her out. She was pacing up and down in front of his car.
“I can’t do this,” she choked as he approached. “I want to be with you, Shane, but not like this. It’s suffocating. Overwhelming. It’s us against them but it doesn’t have to be that way. You can fix this. I just don’t think you want to.”
“You’re afraid you’re going to lose them,” he said.
She spun around and jabbed her finger in his chest. “I’m afraid I’m going to lose you.”
He grabbed her hand, held it over his heart. “Why? Because they’ll demand you make a choice?”
“Because I will demand you make a choice, and Shane, you’re this tough lone wolf. You don’t need anyone, and I’m so scared, so scared, you won’t choose me.”
“But I’m choosing you, Jet. I’ve chosen you.”
“No, you haven’t. Not if you don’t even try to set things right with the Sheenans.”
“What are you saying?”
