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Staring down at her, he saw the exact moment her hazy gaze refocused and reality set back in. She could’ve walked away, but she only took a step back. An invisible force pushed and pulled between them. Need sparred with duty and honor. Summoning inhumane willpower, he let honor win.
“I needed you to know that,” he said, a lame excuse for his earlier behavior, which, if he was honest, was nothing but irrational jealousy.
One of them had to leave before he did something impulsive and unwise. One of them had to gather the strength. Instead of placing that responsibility on her shoulders, he turned for the door, but she gripped his hand. “Give me one more night.”
He allowed the sweetness of the request to seduce him before he pushed the temptation away. “Not here.” Not on a narrow cot in a cabin with paper-thin walls that served as her jail cell.
“Why not?”
He couldn’t scrounge the courage to say it to her face. “You know.”
“We may never have another chance.”
Suspicion hardened his tone. “Why are you talking like this?”
“No reason.” Taking another step back, she said, “Forget I asked.”
Fuck. Why was this so hard? Resting his hands on his hips, he hung his head. “I’ll take you back to the cabin. Maya will keep you company.”
“Maya is a poor substitute,” she said, trying hard to go for humor, but her smile didn’t fool him. “You can at least walk me back.”
Offering his arm, he led her to the deck. Walking arm in arm was pretending something that wasn’t true, and even if he hated himself for the playact, he couldn’t make himself pull away.
The sun was dipping behind the horizon. It would’ve been nice to spend a few minutes in the fresh air, but the boat wasn’t moving and he had to get her back to her cabin before someone noticed he was breaking the rules. The team was already suspicious enough where Clelia was concerned. He didn’t need to give them more reason to doubt his intentions. Luckily, they didn’t run into anyone. The team was probably still gathered in the lounge where he’d left them earlier.
He opened her cabin door and stood aside for her to enter. Obediently, she strolled inside. He was going to say goodnight and close the door, but then she lifted her arms and pulled her T-shirt over her head. He stood rooted to the spot, staring at the curves of her breasts under the black lace of her bra. The tips of her breasts were hard like candy. Had he kissed those breasts when he’d been drunk? He sure as hell hoped so. They’d be a perfect treat for his tongue. His cock grew hard, straining against the zipper of his pants. When she undid the button of her shorts, he snapped out of it.
“What are you doing?” he asked, raking his eyes over her pale, slender form.
Laying down on the bed, she said, “You started it this time. Finish it.”
Fuck. Just a kiss. He was just going to taste her lips. That’s what he told himself as he kicked the door shut and prowled to the bed. Once he’d reached his destination, he stood there like a fool, feeling like the dog that had caught the car. He could only clench and unclench his hands to prevent himself from touching her.
Taking his hand, she placed it over her heart. His fingers curled involuntarily around the soft curve of her breast. Her heartbeat spiked when he squeezed, mirroring the erratic rhythm of his own heartbeat.
“Make the need stop,” she said.
It took every ounce of his willpower, but he managed a small smile. “I can’t make it stop.”
“Then take it away.”
Fuck it. He was only a man, and she was a temptation he found near impossible to resist. He had no idea how this was going to play out. He only knew this crazy attraction wasn’t going to blow over by itself. It wouldn’t let them go until they’d fucked it out of their systems.
Only a kiss, he reminded himself with stern intention as he sat down next to her and framed her face between his palms. She’d taken something from him in that graveyard—his ability to remain objective where she was concerned. But he’d taken a hell of a lot more from her. He carried all the blame, and he’d be damned if he wasn’t going to fix this mess.
Lowering his head, he let her warm breath ghost over his lips. He closed his eyes so he wouldn’t see her pretty face. If he looked into the dark pools of her eyes, he wasn’t sure he’d be able to stop.
Gently, he kissed her eyes, nose, lips, and jaw. He kissed the column of her neck and sucked at the juncture with her shoulder, selfishly leaving a new mark on her skin. Only the fact that she kept perfectly still prevented him from stopping. He wouldn’t be able to if she laid her hands on him. He could worship her body, but wouldn’t take them to the point of no return.
