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“I love you, Ari. I love you with every portion of my heart and soul. I’ve never lied about my feelings—never once. Please give me a chance to explain and make this right for us.”
“How much of a chance did you give me, Eli?” he asked softly. Slowly, he walked toward me. “I’ll offer you the same opportunity you gave me.” He stood in front of me and his eyes dropped to my lips, giving me false hope. “I wanted you to love me so much that I allowed myself to fall for your lies. Please leave Colorado, Eli. It will be difficult for both of us with you here.”
He reached up and touched my cheek. “Don’t follow me and don’t contact me again. I’ll turn my notice in tomorrow. It was good to see you again.”*****AriThree weeks had passed since I walked out of Eli’s life…without much of a fight from him. He hadn’t chased after me that day. He hadn’t dropped to his knees to plead for forgiveness. Nothing. He’d just let me go. With every step I’d taken, another piece of my heart had broken off and dissolved into nothingness. How was it so fucking easy for Eli to survive without me in his life when each day we were apart had been nothing short of hell for me?
Because he doesn’t love you as much as you do him, my brain mocked quietly.
Damn but that acknowledgment hurt every time the words whispered inside my head. The day the relationship fiasco exploded in my face, humiliating me in front of Seth, Baker, and some unknown man, my brain had screamed the words at me—screamed so loudly that my head ached from the assault. As each day passed, the painful reminder still echoed inside me, but the voice grew quieter. Strange, the whispered words mocked me even more, caused even more pain.
When I’d planned my disappearing act on the cruise, it had taken Eli exactly zero minutes to figure out what I’d do. He’d tracked me as easily as one of the vampires tracked his mates in the supernatural romance books I read religiously. This time? I could only assume he hadn’t put forth any efforts to find me. It wasn’t like I had many hiding places available to me, so I had to accept he wasn’t looking.
I snorted out loud, causing Havoc to dig her claws into my leg, “Easy girl, put those away. I’ve suffered enough.” She meowed and blinked her eyes at me…then dug her claws in again just because she could. “Why doesn’t Eli want your daddy, Havoc? I’m not that big of a loser, am I?” Another twitch of her claws and this time the nail went straight through my jeans. Yeah, that one broke the skin. Hell, even my cat knew I wasn’t worth much.
“Forget it. You’re right. Oh well, I’ve been alone forever so it’s not like I can’t adjust to it again, right baby? Me and you together forever!” Like an idiot, I grabbed her paw and made her give me a high-five, which resulted in a scratch mark across my palm.
God, this poor cat. I’d rescued her from a shelter as soon as Eli had left me the first time. She’s seen me at my worst and at my…well, she’d seen me at my worst. Obviously, I’d peaked at my worst. This was it—my past, present, and future.
A soft knock on the door caused me to jump in fear and Havoc to disappear from my lap and wiggle her fat rump under the couch to hide. A huge part of me wished it would be Eli, that he’d come to find me and tell me everything was going to be okay. The tiny part of my brain still working assured me it was either Seth or Baker, even if they weren’t scheduled to be back from their assignment for another two weeks. I clicked the security remote and the door swung open. Baker walked in, carrying a load of groceries. He wrinkled his nose when he looked around the living room.
“Why are you frowning? The place is spotless. I suffer from OCD and have germophobia. It’s not like I let myself go like you did when you thought Seth ditched you.” I cocked a brow at him. “I’ve bathed twice a day…unlike the twice a month you went for when you were grieving the supposed loss of your love.” Baker and Seth had gotten a happy ending—why couldn’t I?
After sitting the groceries on the counter, Baker walked over and plopped down on the oversized chair across from me. “I’m frowning because Seth agreed to let you hide out here in exchange for you painting the walls.” He looked around at the unopened paint cans, sitting in the same spots where Seth had left them. Paint brushes were spotless. Nothing. I’d done nothing but pout and mourn the loss of the love of my life.
