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Keep going, a voice said. Just keep going.
Was the voice inside my mind? It seemed to drift into me along with the wind, but it didn’t sound like my voice. Didn’t sound like a man at all.
It was a woman’s voice.
Keep going. Keep going.
I moved along, now warm inside my parka, dancing around the roots as they presented at my feet.
But the trees. They never stopped. Never ended. Just when I thought I’d gotten closer to the light, more trees appeared. They popped up like they did in a child’s storybook.
Pop. Pop. Pop.
So much to get through. So dense was this forest. So many layers to peel. So many. So many.
Onward I trudged, through the dense foliage, over the tangled roots. Warm now, clothed in the parka, the down insulation like a fire on a hearth.
Keep going. Keep going. Keep going.
I inhaled deeply, gathering my courage and my strength. Keep going, I said to myself, closing my eyes. Keep going. It’s getting easier. You figured out the roots, you found a coat to keep you warm. Only the trees left to master.
Only the trees.
I opened my eyes.
A clearing. No more trees. And in the distance, a metal cube stood.
I walked toward it slowly, slowly, slowly.
Until I could see what it was.
An elevator.
A fucking elevator.
And lying on the ground in front of it was…
A key.My eyes popped open.
“Mr. Wolfe?”
Where the hell was I? My arms were still warm until I regarded them. I no longer wore the parka, and goosebumps popped out from the cold. Yes, my arms were cold again. Cold like they’d been…
“Was I in a forest?” I asked.
“You seemed to be,” Dr. Woolcott said.
“But why? I’ve never been in a forest in my life. I’m not really an outdoors person.”
“You were inside your mind. Your mind created the forest as a barrier to the memory you seek. It’s quite common.”
“Forests?”
“Forests. Mountains. Water. All are barriers. One patient of mine actually created a black hole.”
“So buried memories are common?”
“I wouldn’t say common, exactly, but more common than you might think.”
“Why? I finally got through the forest, finally made it to a clearing…and then pop. Here I am. Why didn’t it work?”
“It did.”
“But it didn’t. I found the key. Actually saw it lying in front of an elevator, but then suddenly I’m back here.”
“I understand your frustration, but you made great progress for your first session.”
“But now I’ll have to start all over.”
She shook her head. “It will be easier the next time. You’ll have a coat, and you already know how to get through the tapestry of roots on the ground.”
“Wait. How do you know about that?”
“I was guiding you. Instructing you.”
“You showed me how to get through the forest?”
“No. I simply gave you the tools to get through yourself.”
“The coat?”
“I suggested it.”
“You suggested it, and all of a sudden it was there? I don’t understand.”
“I can’t make you do anything during hypnosis, Mr. Wolfe. I can only suggest. You want to get to the bottom of this. If you didn’t, you would have ignored my suggestion for the coat.”
“How did the coat just appear?”
“You made it appear. This isn’t real life. It’s in your mind. You can make anything appear in your mind. As an artist, you know that better than anyone.”
“If I wanted to get there, why did I stop?”
“It’s a normal response,” she said. “You’ve buried this thing for so long that it will be difficult for you to find it. Part of you wants to take the easy route. Keep it buried. But part of you wants very much to find it, to deal with it and be rid of it. It’s that part that I try to bring out of you.”
“But we failed.”
“Hardly. You did much better than a lot of my patients in their first session. You actually got through the barrier. That says a lot about you and your determination, Mr. Wolfe. I can’t make any guarantees, but I think you’re going to be successful.”
“Can we go on?” I asked. “Finish this tonight?”
“You’ve been here for two hours. This takes a lot out of you. You need some rest.”
As if on cue, my face split into a giant yawn. Right. I hadn’t slept in over a day. I probably did need to rest.
“But I want to keep going. I don’t want to lose it. I don’t want to find myself in the forest again.”
“You may very well find yourself in the forest again, but like I said, you’ll have an easier time getting out.”
“When can I come back?”
“We’ll set something up with Nanette on the way out. I’ll get you in as soon as I can.”
“I’ll come anytime. Money is no object.”
She laughed. “Not for a Wolfe, I’m sure. I’ll do my best to accommodate you.” Then she stood. “Shall we?”
I followed her out of her office.
