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Because I was in such a good mood, I decided to make pancakes. No one else was awake yet, so I went to the kitchen and started pouring and measuring and mixing. When I got the first flapjack on the pan, Olivia and Scarlett walked in.
“Good morning, sleepyheads.”
“Are those pancakes!” Livvy came to stand right next to my leg, trying to get a look at what I was doing on the counter.
“Yeah, I thought we could have some pancakes for breakfast. Do you guys want pancakes?”
“Yay!” She pumped her fists up, smiling. I looked over at Scarlett, and she nodded.
“Pancakes sound nice.”
“Great. You two relax, and I’ll get you some food.”
“Okay!”
Livvy went to sit down at the table, and Scarlett joined her. The two of them chatted while I cooked. I could see Scarlett looking over at me every so often. I knew we would need to talk, but I wanted to enjoy the extra spring in my step that I woke up with. It was nice to wake up happy for a change. I was going to let myself sit in it for a little bit.
We were all sitting and eating the pancakes I had made. Olivia was lost in the sticky sweetness of her over syruped plate, but Scarlett was obviously lost in her own mind. I could tell she wanted to bring up last night, but it was impossible to do so. I didn’t want her freaking out all day, so I did what I could to assuage her fears.
“Do you guys want to go for a hike? All together?”
Olivia agreed immediately, but Scarlett seemed wary. “A hike?” she asked.
“Yeah, I think we could all use some fresh air, and it would be nice to spend some time together. If you want to, we could even head over to the lake.”
“Can we do the paddle boats?” my little angel asked.
“Of course, sweetie.” I ruffled Olivia’s hair a little, and she giggled.
“The paddle boats are the funnest. You will like them, Auntie Scarlett.”
“I’m sure I will,” Scarlett smiled.
She kept that smile when she looked at me. There was still a lot unsaid between the two of us, but we were beginning to get somewhere warmer with one another.
***
Olivia, Scarlett, and I were on our hike, making our way to the lake. We were almost there. The walk up had been enjoyable. Olivia was a bit of a firecracker, taking off through the woods. I’d never seen her like this before, but it was nice. It was clear that she was happy
“We’re here!”
Olivia ran over to the small dock where the paddle boats were located. Scarlett and I gave each other a quick look before racing after her. I got there first and scooped up my little bundle, holding her close to my chest.
“And where do you think you’re going?”
“I want to get out in the boat!” She was wiggling in my arms, trying to get back on the ground.
“We will. We will! You have to put on your water shoes and floaties. We have to be safe before anything else.”
She suddenly went limp in my hands. It was so surprising, I almost dropped her. “Okay, Daddy…” She sounded so disappointed, it was hilarious to me, but I kept my laughter zipped up. It was time to take care of my little drama queen. I walked over to the table where Scarlett had put down our bags. She saw Olivia in my arms, and a secret smile grew on her lips. Scarlett took out everything Olivia needed for a boat ride. We helped her get dressed and placed her on top of the table.
“Now sit for a few seconds. Scarlett and I have to get ready.”
Olivia nodded. We put on our water shoes and flotation devices. The three of us packed into one of the paddle boats, Livvy between Scarlett and me.
We went around the lake, Livvy being our navigator telling us where to go. All the anger and sadness I was feeling, I wouldn’t say it was just gone. I’d probably always be sad thinking about Kylie’s death, but I wasn’t consumed by it anymore. I could go through the day and simply enjoy it.
The rest of the day, we hung around the lake and relaxed in the outdoors. Livvy and Scarlett had packed us a secret lunch, and it was delicious. Olivia sat across from the two of us, Scarlett and I, side by side. I saw her hand was resting on the bench, and I softly placed mine on top of hers. Surprise passed over her face as she looked at me. We couldn’t say much in the moment, but we both smiled. I was finally able to admit to myself that I was glad to have Scarlett back in my life.
Livvy went to sleep almost immediately when we got back home. The three of us ended up spending the entire day by the lake, and it was so surprising to see it getting dark. Since we hadn’t prepared to be out at night, we made sure to make the walk back quicker. Olivia was already tired, so I ended up carrying her most of the way back, but it did help make getting back home faster.
