Page 80 of Bad for You (Dirty Deeds 3)

I rushed out of the room before I made another sound.

The tears were instant, pouring out of me, fast and heavy. There was no stopping them. Pushing the bathroom door closed behind me, I sank to the floor in front of the toilet and sobbed into my hands. I was as far away from the door as I could get without climbing inside the shower.

Maybe I should’ve done that.

I wasn’t in there a minute before the door swung open and I’d been found, and because I didn’t want Sean knowing why I was really crying since I wasn’t ready to have this conversation with him, being in the current state I was in and feeling the unrelenting weight of my emotions ripping me apart, I lunged at the toilet and hung my head in it.

“The fuck?”

His voice hit me over the sound of my cough/sob, which was the only word I knew to describe what I was doing.

After flushing nothing but toilet water, I wiped at my mouth and lifted my head, blinking away tears so I could see him.

“I just really hate throwing up,” I whispered, then immediately began crying again, because he was standing there with those words written on his body and I was mad at myself for not finding Sean sooner so I could’ve somehow prevented him from doing that to himself.

With worry in his eyes, Sean stepped inside the bathroom and squatted down beside me. He placed his hand on my lower back. “You still got more to get out of you?” he asked.

I stared into his perfect face, belonging to this perfect man, who had overcome so much to be here.

“No, I think that’s it,” I said, crying more heavily now. “I-I’m done.”

Sean stood, grabbed the small towel off the sink and got it damp. He wiped my mouth with it. Then he set the towel aside and lifted me off the floor so I was cradled against his chest.

I buried my face in his neck and sobbed.

“Shit. You really fuckin’ hate throwing up, don’t you?”

I nodded.

I wasn’t lying. I really did hate throwing up. Typically, it didn’t upset me like this, but I was okay leading him to believe that.

Feeling the bed underneath me, I opened my eyes as Sean sat me down on the edge. I wiped a few tears away and watched him slide a small bucket out from between the trunk and the bed. He sat it beside my feet.

“Why do you have a bucket in here?” I asked him.

“Nightmares,” was all he said.

I pulled my lips between my teeth and trapped a sob inside my mouth.

Oh, God.

Oh, God.

He didn’t need to say any more. He got sick just from thinking about that awful woman and the childhood he’d had. I just knew he did.

I was softly crying still when Sean lifted my feet into bed and forced me to lie back in the spot he had been asleep in.

He pulled the quilt up and around my body and tucked it in, then he climbed in himself, planting his knee in the bed below my feet and getting up beside me. He lay on his back. He gave me all the covers. He didn’t take any for himself.

“You all right?” he asked.

I nodded, swallowing down the emotion thickening my throat. Knowing I wasn’t anywhere near finished crying, especially after what Sean had just revealed to me, I turned away from him and faced the door.

So many things filled my head, but one thing was standing out over all the others. I wanted Sean knowing he belonged. That people cared for him, and wanted him around.

“Sundays are family dinner nights at Syd and Brian’s house,” I began, tears still pouring down my face, but my voice sounding steadier than it had been. “You’re invited. It’s a standing thing, no matter who can make it or not. Sometimes people bring a dish, but it’s not required. You absolutely do not have to bring a dish. Tomorrow, I obviously can’t make it and neither can you due to work, but if you’re up for it, I would really like it if you’d accompany me to the next one I’m able to attend.”

Sean was silent for a moment, then I felt the bed move behind me, and a second later, Sean’s chest was pressing up against my back. His arm draped over my waist, and he buried his nose in my hair.

I could feel his warm breath on the back of my scalp.

“Um, is that a yes?” I asked hesitantly.

I felt his head move. He’d lifted his chin.

That was a yes.

I closed my eyes and felt my body melt deeper into the mattress.

Hands folded in front of my mouth, I used my fingers to wipe my tears away, then I looked off the bed.

“Sean?”

“Yeah.”

“I’m gonna get you to a place where you no longer need that bucket.”

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