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“I know its shit,” I murmured as I gave in and walked to his car. “It’s your fault,” I said quietly as I got into his Bentley.
“What is?” he snapped.
“That your suit smells like whiskey,” I stated.
“Addie you poured the whiskey on me. My favorite one I may add,” he challenged as he sped off.
“You made me,” I said curtly.
“How?”
“You broke the rules. I wasn’t going to sit there and have some girl hang all over you.” Once I said it, I seriously wish I had a way to take it back.
“You were jealous?” he said smugly.
“No. I was playing the part of an angry girlfriend,” I said saving myself.
“What did you want me to do, Addie? I was pissed. I did it to hurt you. I know I was wrong, but fuck, you pissed me off,” he said gruffly.
“How? How did I piss you off?” I asked in a serious tone. “And don’t you dare say it’s because I didn’t tell you anything,” I challenged.
“You said nothing to me, Addie, not one word. Everyone else knew, but not me,” Daimon said bitterly.
“What did you want, Daimon? That the moment I signed that contract, I’d lay all my chips down. Did you really think I would tell you, you of all people?”
Daimon stopped his car in front of my home and turned to face me. “Why me of all people?” he said annoyed.
“You’d lord it over me, Daimon. I lost my mother. It was my fault she died. If I didn’t ask her to do something special for me, she wouldn’t have died. Once she died, everything turned to shit. Everything I touch turns to shit and that’s what going to happen to you, too. So that’s why I never told you anything. That’s why I never wanted you to go anywhere near Frank and my shit-filled life,” I cried gently.
Daimon sat quietly in the car taking in all I had said. I began crying and laughing at the same time. “I'm such a fucking loser. My dad got so sick and I thought I could take over for my mother and work the diner, but even that I turned to shit,” I laughed and wiped my tears. “Maybe this is my penance for killing my mother, who knows. Look what I did to Frank,” I said still laughing.
“Addie, you didn’t kill your mother and you didn’t make Frank beat you!” Daimon shouted.
“Stop! Don’t even try. Nothing anyone can tell me is going to change how I feel. I fucked it all up, Daimon. I did. Not Sofia, not my father, me. It was all me,” I cried. Daimon reached over to try to comfort me, but I stopped him. “Enough!” I no longer wanted to talk about it. Daimon saw a side of me no one had ever seen.
“Addie, you didn’t do anything,” he said vehemently, but I ignored him.
“Thank you for helping me today,” I said wiping the last of my tears. “Again, I'm sorry you had to deal with Frank, but I'm not sorry about the whiskey,” I smiled trying to lighten the mood. I could no longer stand myself anymore. I never told anyone how I felt and here I was telling Daimon everything.
I reached for the door, but Daimon clasped onto my arm, pulled me in and kissed me. It was soft and tender, as his warm lips slowly moved over mine. I melted into his embrace, seeking his comfort. I sought out his dominance as he took my lips, giving me what I didn’t know I wanted. His mouth softly pressed onto my lips as I moved in closer, pulling at him. Daimon gently placed his hands on my face and took me in. I could feel the jaded pieces of my broken heart begin to soften. That’s when I pushed him away. Daimon held onto my face looked at me intently, as he began to caress my hair.
“I'm sorry,” he said softly. Those words rang so loudly inside his silent car, piercing my soul. I didn’t want his pity; I didn’t want him to be sorry.
I pushed myself from him, jumped out of the car, and ran inside.
I kicked off my shoes and headed to the bathroom upstairs. I turned on the water and splashed my face. I took the towel and bit into it as I stifled yet another cry. My tears fell as I remembered the day we had buried my mother. I remembered the smell of those fucking lilies as they sent wreath after wreath. I remembered her funeral and all her friends sending their condolences to our family. I remembered Sofia holding me tightly by the hand, afraid of everyone around her, as she snuck behind me, trying desperately to hide. She hated the attention and so did I. I hated the look of pity and sadness as they all looked at us. At night, Sofia kept asking for Mom in her sleep, calling out to her constantly. It took months of me holding her in my arms for her to finally sleep normally. I did this to them, to all of us.
