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I lock down the house and head for my bathroom. I opt to take a hot shower instead of a bath. All I want is to wash away the hospital smell. I don’t bother to dress and just throw on my pink fluffy robe and grab my Kindle. My tummy rumbles loudly and I realize I haven’t eaten today. I don’t feel like making anything, so I just order Chinese.
I’m getting to a really juicy part in my book when the doorbell rings, making me jump. Figuring it’s my takeout, I grab my wallet, turn off the alarm and open the door.
“That’s how you open a fucking door, Cherry?” Carter growls. I jump back in shock and end up tripping over my own feet, falling flat on my ass.
My heart starts pounding at the sound of his voice. Looking up at him, I see his face is set in a hard glare and his jaw is tightly clenched. He’s just a big as I remember, but I swear his effect on me is magnified. After all, now I know how he kisses, what his hands feel like as they caress my skin, how it feels to be owned by him.
Instantly he’s on me, lifting me off the floor like I weigh nothing. I automatically wrap my arms and legs around him to keep from falling. Kicking the door closed with his foot, he walks to the couch, dropping down on to it so I end up straddling him. I know I should be screaming and yelling at him, but my body just clings to his, and I bury my face in his neck. I felt scared all day and I finally feel safe again. It’s as if he’s taken all my worries away with just his presence.
That’s when it hits me. My moment of relief is swept away by sadness and jealousy. All I can smell on him is cheap women's perfume. I lose it. Angrily, I push myself off his lap. God! To think I curled myself around him like a loyal puppy. Here I am clinging to him, and he’s spent his night with another woman? What happened to all that “I’m yours, and you're mine bullshit”? I swear I can feel my tattoo of his name burning my skin.
“You stink, Carter. You smell like another woman. I understand that you don’t want to be with me, but, Jesus, have some compassion.”
“It’s not what you think, Cherry,” Carter says softly. He starts to rise and I hold my hand out, not wanting him to get up. He looms over me, filling my entire field of vision. He’s easily over a foot taller than me, and right now I need to be on the same level as him.
“I don’t believe you. See, you have this problem of lying to me and running away. You’re just that kind of man it seems,” I throw the words at him as my anger gets the best of me.
“Never lied to you,” he clips.
“Doesn’t matter. I don’t want to fight about this and I’m done crying. I’m letting you go,” I say forcefully. Maybe if I’m forceful enough with my words, even I’ll believe them.
“You’re letting me go?” he says in a tone that implies I’ve lost it. Maybe I have. God, why does he have to be so beautiful?
I tear my eyes away from him and shift my gaze to my feet. “I can’t justify this to myself anymore. I fight with myself trying to rationalize your actions. I go over and over everything that happened between us in my head. I’m driving myself crazy. Every time I give myself over to you, it’s just a waste of my love. Leave me alone, Carter.” I put my hand over my belly and his eyes go there. “Leave us alone. Please.”
I wish I could sound more commanding, more convincing but I can’t. I feel my shoulders drop in defeat and I close my eyes tightly
The silence is deafening.
Chapter 3
Carter
Did she just say “us”? She didn’t just say “us”. Did she?
I look up at Layla as she stands over me and I see her shoulders start to shake. I watch in horror as tear start to run down her cheeks.
“No, no, no, no, no,” I chant, standing and picking her up again. “Don’t cry, baby, please don’t cry.”
I’m making my way to her room with her in my arms when the doorbell rings. “Who the fuck is that?” I ask.
“Crap. That’s the Chinese I ordered,” Layla says hoarsely.
“I’ll take care of it,” I tell her and put her down. I walk to the door, open it up and see the young guy holding the food. I grab some bills out of my pocket and shove them in his hand, mumbling a “thanks” as I grab the food and slam the door in his face. I flip the lock, set the alarm, and then throw the food in the fridge. I stalk over to my girl as she watches me warily and pick her back up.
“I can walk you know,” she sniffles.
I ignore her protest and carry her across the room and down the small hallway to her bedroom. I can’t handle her tears and seeing her upset breaks my heart.
I take her into her room and set her down gently on the edge of the bed. I straighten and gaze at her small body. I feel my protective instincts overwhelm me.
“Cherry, baby, look at me,” I demand. I know she needs me take control. It’s how we work, and now is no different. She looks up at me with big watery eyes and it’s all I can do not to break down with her. These past months apart from her have torn me to pieces inside. Seeing her push me away is enough to end me. I reach down pull my shirt off. I need to get this fucking stink off of me, and get my girl’s scent where it should be – on me.
She looks at my bare chest and then back at my eyes. “Cherry, I will explain everything to you. I swear. But right now, you need to explain what you meant by ‘us’.”
She breaks eye contact and looks out the window. “Don’t pretend like you don’t know, Carter. I’m sure Saint went and tattled to you the day he found out. It’s fine. Whatever. The baby and I didn’t need you three months ago and we sure as hell don’t need you now.”
Her words send me over the edge and I fall to my knees in front of her. “Baby?” I whisper.
She looks at me, confusion written all over her face.
“You didn’t know?” she asks, tentatively. Hope creeps across her beautiful face. She reaches her hand out to touch me but then stops herself and lets it drop to her side. Seeing her stop herself from touching me hurts more than if she had smacked me.
For the first time in my life I feel tears well in my eyes. “A baby,” I whisper again and let my head fall in her lap. She’s wearing only a bathrobe and it comes undone with the movement. If this is going to be the first time in my life I cry, I don’t want her to watch me do it. I didn't even cry when I lost my parents. I wrap my arms around her waist and bury my face against her belly. “My baby,” I gasp, and feel warm tears on my cheek.
Layla starts rubbing my head and shoulders and I feel her starting to cry too. “You really didn’t know? God, Carter, I thought you didn’t want me. Where have you been? Why did you leave me? I’ve been miserable without you.”
“Cherry. Just give me a second to feel this. I’ll tell you everything. I just want to have this moment. Please.” I hear my voice crack.
I’m on my knees, holding her naked body to my bare chest for what feels like forever. I hear her laugh a little and sniff,
and I know she’s enjoying this moment too. I move my head so my lips are against her belly and start to speak. “Hey, little guy, I’m your dad. I love you and your mom so much.” I kiss her soft belly once and lean back to look at her. She has a huge smile on her face and I finally feel like my world is complete. Who would have thought my path of vengeance would have led me to what was taken from me?
“‘Little guy?’ It’s a bit soon to know what we’re having, Carter.”
“A man can dream, can’t he? You’re here, so my first dream came true.”
Cherry rolls her eyes at my lame joke, but I know she’s eating it up. I reach up and rub her leftover tears away and kiss each cheek. I move my arms down and push her robe off her shoulders.
“Carter, wait. I want to talk first,” she says, and makes a move to cover herself up.
“Cherry, my love, it’s been three months since I tasted your honey. I’ll talk, but it’s gonna be muffled.”
Layla laughs and lets me finish taking off her robe. Once she’s completely naked, I stand up and get out of my jeans and boots as quickly as possible. I look at her beautiful naked body before me, and I notice something on her ribs.
“What’s on your side, Layla?”
I see the red spread across her cheeks and I feel like she’s hiding something. I get closer and move her arm out of the way, so I can see what’s on her perfect body. That’s when I see it. My name tattooed on her ribs in black ink.
“Oh, Cherry. Why would you mark your beautiful body with my name? I’m not worthy of this.”
“I got it the day I woke up and you were gone. I knew that no matter what you’d always be a part of me. I wanted to have a physical representation of what I carry in my heart.”
I lean down and kiss the tattoo of my name. I trace it lightly with my fingers and kiss it again. I know I don’t deserve this from her but seeing my name on her, knowing she put it there makes me feel ten-feet tall.
“Thank you, baby, I love it. And I love you.”
