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Saint
I carry Jeanette up the stairs to my room at the warehouse. We go straight to the bathroom and I sit her on the counter to undress her. She’s covered in dirt, and her hair is a mess. I take off the ripped sheet she had wrapped around her and her silk panties. She’s completely naked and I try not to let my rage take over.
“Did they touch you?” I ask calmly. I’m holding on to my control by a thread because I don’t know what will set her off and send her back into her dark place, but I need to know.
Jeanette gets a distant, faraway look in her eyes, but I grab her chin and bring her focus back to me. “Talk to me, Mama.” She’s dirty and a little bruised up, but otherwise looks okay. But I know her, and I know she covers up her shit like a pro.
A little smile curves one side of her mouth, and I can see I’ve brought her back with just that name. She loves it when I call her that. No matter how much she says she doesn’t.
She shakes her head, but I look at her sternly and she tells me what happened. I breathe evenly and just let the story wash over me. I make mental notes, but otherwise I don’t move a muscle. After she’s finished with the whole story, my first thoughts are of how I’m going to kill Marco. I play it out a few different ways in my mind and I go through a couple of scenarios before Jeanette snaps her fingers in my face.
“Hey! Focus please. I believe you were undressing me—in preparations for a shower, I hope?”
“Yeah, Mama. We’ve got to wash this funk off you.”
She laughs a little and I can see she’s pushed the dark thoughts away. I don’t know how she does it, but she’s so much stronger than I could’ve ever imagined. When I first met this sassy blonde, all I could think about was how to get her over my knee. Who would have thought I’d be the one bending over just to have a chance with her?
Some people might see the way I love her as weakness. The way I give her what she wants and allow her to take the lead may come across as spineless, but what most people don’t see is that’s the only way to keep her. My Jeanette has been through so much and one day she’ll tell me, but I know she has to be in control. For her, control equals love. I think men before me have tried to tame her, and that’s where they went wrong. You can’t tame a tidal wave. You can only hope to hold on, ride it out and pray it doesn’t drown you. My Mama is fierce, and where other men have failed her, I won’t. I’m the first, last, and only man to have her heart and it will forever stay that way.
I turn on the water in the big walk-in shower and get it ready for her. Once it’s heated up, I help her off the bathroom counter and follow behind her to the shower. She goes to the spray and puts her face into it, washing off the dirt. I get the hand-held showerhead and start washing her hair. We don’t speak for a while as I wash her body tenderly. She lets me pamper her this way every time we shower. It’s my way of showing her that I will always worship her, and it’s her way of showing me her vulnerable side. She’s allowing her body to be touched, not in a sexual way, but in a loving way, and that’s a first for her. It’s a first for me too, but I don’t think about my past. To me, there was never anyone before her, and there won’t be anyone after.
It’s been so long since she let me touch her. I hate what drove her into my arms today but I’m glad that she’s here. That even if she was pissed at me she knew I would take care of her. I would always be there for her.
I’m on my knees in front of her washing her long beautiful legs when she looks down at me. “Tell me you love me,” she says.
“I love you, Jeanette.”
This has become our thing now. I didn’t know how she would react the first time I wanted to say it, so I held it in. I didn’t want to scare her off, so I just kept it to myself and tried to physically show her how I felt. Instead, my sassy Mama gave me the cockiest look I’ve ever seen and said “tell me you love me”. She knew exactly what I felt and wanted to make me admit it. It was a crossroads for us. Either I submitted to her and said it or I held my ground. I didn’t have a single doubt in my mind which path I would take. If I had to crack open my chest and give her my heart, that’s what I would’ve done.
She hasn’t said it back to me and I don’t know if she ever will. It’s not in her nature to give something up so easily, so I know if the day comes, she’ll mean it.
I keep washing her legs, and she starts running her fingers through my wet hair. I close my eyes and enjoy her attention while reminding myself of what could have happened, and how lucky I am she’s here with me.
“I think my heart died about a thousand times while we were searching for you,” I tell her.
“Good thing it didn’t. I happen to really enjoy our shower time together, so try to keep that ticker going, okay?”
I rest my forehead on her lower stomach and kiss the smooth skin there. I take a deep breath and wrap my arms around her. “I grew up living with my grandmother,” I say, and I feel her stiffen. It takes a second before she relaxes again and goes back to stroking my hair, and I keep talking. “My mother was a prostitute and had no clue who my dad was. She got into drugs when I was little, and at some point my grandmother found out and came to get me. My mom would visit when she could, which wasn’t much. But I remember she always loved how I could make her laugh. So every time she came over, I would do whatever I could to get her to smile. I remember thinking if I could make her pain go away, or make her forget for even an hour, then that’s what I needed to do.” Jeanette remains quiet as she plays with my hair and the warm shower steam surrounds us.
“The last time she came to see me, I was 12. I tried all day, and I couldn’t get her to crack a smile. Nothing worked, and when she told me goodbye, she cried a little. I knew that would be the last time I would ever see her, and it was. She killed herself the next day and it broke my heart.” I look up to see Jeanette gazing down at me and we lock eyes. “I blamed myself for a long time for that, but I know there was more to it than me. It took me years to understand that it wasn’t my fault, and it was her choice. Maybe there’s still a little part of me that will always need you to laugh and smile so that I know you’re okay, but no matter what, I need you to stay with me. Got it?”
She gives me a sad smile and nods her head. She touches the side of my face with her palm, and says, “I got it, Michael.” I know when she says my real name she means business, and I’m so relieved.
I stand up and help her out of the shower, drying her off first and then myself. I go over and she wraps her arms around my neck and I lean down grabbing her ass and picking her up. Jeanette wraps her legs around me and I silently carry her to the bed. When we get to the edge, I let her down and I kneel beside it in front of her. I put my forehead to her stomach again and wrap my arms around her waist. I hug her like that for just a moment before I lean back on my heels and look up at her. “What does my Mama want?”
“Get on the bed on all fours, Saint. I need to feel control right now.”
“You got it, baby.” My cock is already hard and pointing at her. My piercing is like a star on top of a Christmas tree, just waiting for praise. I stand up and she looks down at it with a big smile. She knows all she has to do is look at me and I’m done. Anytime, anywhere, I’m hers to play with.
I crawl on the bed and get on my hands and knees.
“Spread your legs a little. I want to see everything from behind.”
I spread my knees further apart and feel her get on the bed behind me. I’m nervous about exactly what kind of mood she’s in, but I know whatever it is, I would give it to her.
I feel her hot breath on the backs of my thighs and then her warm, wet tongue licking there. Her hands come around and rub my legs, slowly working her way to my cock.
Jeanette’s tongue works its way up to my ass cheek and suddenly she bites me there.
“Fuck!”
“God, I love your ass,” she murmurs, and I can hear the smile in her voice. She bites me hard, but it feels so good to have her mouth on me.
I fe
el her kisses move and then she licks my balls. “Goddamn, that mouth of yours,” I breathe. I feel her hands on my hard shaft. She works my cock with both of her hands and sucks my balls from behind. I leak precum all over the bedding and I’m so scared I’m about to blow a load in under sixty seconds.
I feel her mouth move and the warm tip of her tongue is tracing my asshole. “Jeanette!” I shout, but she doesn’t stop. She loves pushing my boundaries, and allowing her to do that makes her feel like she has the control. I close my eyes tightly and give myself over to the sensations. They are so foreign because no one has ever done that to me, and it feels so good. She’s gives my ass tentative licks and I start to shake. Suddenly, she uses her fingers to pull on my cock piercing, and I can’t think.
“Mama. Oh God, Jeanette. I’m gonna…”
I’m unable to finish the sentence before cumming all over her hands. Big, thick, streams of cum coat her fingers and I hear her giggle of satisfaction at my undoing. She fucking loves to make me cum on myself.
I collapse in a heap on the bed and I feel her climb over my body. “Get it back up, Saint, my pussy needs some attention.”
I laugh and roll over on my back showing her my still-hard cock. “Please. Like this thing ever goes down when you’re near me. Plus, I haven't had you in months. I’m sure the thing will stay up all night for you.”
She gives me a sad smile, as if remembering that she’s been fighting me.
“True. I do love that magic stick of yours,” she says and winks lasciviously at me. She glances over at the nightstand and I know what she’s thinking. I clench my teeth to stop me from telling her “no” but she reaches over, opening the drawer and pulls out a box a condoms. How they got there I have no fucking idea, and I want to curse whoever put them there. I haven't fucked anyone since I laid eyes on Jeanette, and I sure as hell never fucked her with a condom. The only woman I’ve ever had bare is her—my woman. Not that I slept around a lot before I met her, but every now and then when I did hook up, it was quick and just for one night.
