AllFreeNovel
Share Us
He didn’t.
I side-stepped his big body, holding my breath to block out the warm, masculine scent of him, and hurried to my car, angry that Ben would rather spend the evening alone than with me. Out in public.
I should have known. Maybe I did know and just didn’t want to believe it because the truth was, my crush on Ben had only grown since we started spending time together. “Maybe, maybe, maybe.” It was all speculation and I was tired of thinking about it so I slammed on the horn when I pulled up in front of Mara’s place.
She came running down a few seconds later, a confused look on her face. “Who pissed you off in the twenty minutes since we spoke? And don’t lie to me.”
“Ben. I don’t want to talk about it.”
Mara laughed. “Oh yes you do, but I’ll do you the favor of not pushing you to talk until there’s food between us. And if it turns out to be bad, I might even ply you with booze and drive us home.”
I looked over at Mara and laughed. “Who are you, and what did you do with my friend Mara?”
“Shut up, I’m being supportive and shit.” She flashed a grin and rolled her eyes with a sigh. “Sheesh.”
“My bad,” I told her, slightly amused. “I stand corrected.”
“Damn straight you do.” Mara was true to her word and she didn’t ask why I was upset until we arrived at The Black Olive and there was a plate of anchovy-stuffed olives and meatballs between us, to start. “All right, what happened?”
I sucked in a deep breath and told her what had just gone down between me and Ben. “He didn’t even consider going, just I don’t feel like going out and that was it. What the hell is up with that?”
Mara sighed and chewed her olive. “What do you think is up with that? Because it sounds like you’ve got your panties in a twist over a theory, cockamamie, or otherwise.”
I glared. “It’s not cockamamie, it’s a theory, period. I think Ben is embarrassed to be seen with me. Or maybe he’s embarrassed that he’s attracted to me, I don’t know anything other than he is most definitely embarrassed by me.”
“Bull.” Mara stared me down with that steely look she usually reserved for Xander, and I sighed and waved at her to finish whatever she had to say. “I think you’re being crazy, but let’s just say you’re right. What do you plan to do about it?”
“That’s the problem, I don’t really know. My instinct is to test him, figure out why we’re only together in my house. Not even his house,” I said as realization dawned. “Not even his house, Mara. Am I some dirty little secret?”
“Now you sound ridiculous.” Mara snorted and shook her head before she popped an olive in her mouth.
“I don’t want this to be true, but he told his mother we were just friends not long after we had sex. And I was sitting right there.”
“Ouch. I’m sorry, Joss.”
“Don’t be. It’s not your fault. It’s mine for letting him in, over and over again.” Was I so desperate for a man, any man, that I would take whatever scraps Ben was willing to give? “I invited him along, clearly upset, and still he decided to go home. Rather than be seen eating a meal with me.”
“With us,” she clarified. “Maybe he just wanted you all to himself?”
A nice thought, but I didn’t believe it. “If that were true, he would’ve said so.”
“Would he? I mean, it sounds like your whole problem, both of you, is an extreme lack of communication.”
“Exactly,” I said, barely hearing her words. “That’s why I need to test him. It’s the only way to know for sure.”
“Er, well, that. Or you could just ask him.”
“No. If I ask, Ben will just tell me what he thinks I want to hear. His actions will tell me the truth.”
“You’re asking for trouble, but I can see that you’ve talked yourself into this ridiculous plan.” Mara leaned back when more food arrived at the table, a knowing smirk on her face. “Just know that when this all goes to hell, which it totally will, I’ll be here for you.”
“Thanks. I think.”
“And I’ll only say ‘I told you so’ one time before I offer comfort.” She flashed a smile before she shoved a meatball in her mouth.
I was sick of hearing the sound of my voice, so I enjoyed way too many anchovy stuffed olives, meatballs, potatoes and an obscene amount of bread before I said another word.
“Fine, I won’t test him. It’s stupid anyway, and chances of success are slim.”
Mara sighed, seemingly satisfied with my decision. “You’re both educated people, use those college words to figure it out.”
Words. Sounded easy enough, in theory, but in reality it would leave me as confused as I was now. “I’m done talking about it. I’m done overthinking it too.”
