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“All right, Joss. Let’s follow your illogical train of thought. Why would I want the entire school to know what a ‘big man’ I am?”
“What?” It took a moment for his question to sink in and I shrugged. “Because it was inevitable that people would find out about us and this way you can seem like the good guy, instead of…not.”
“So, I send you flowers so everyone will think you broke my heart?”
“I won’t pretend to understand the twisted workings of your mind.” I didn’t want to know. All I wanted was to curl up in bed for a few days and get over him completely.
“Well then I’ll just tell you. Have a seat.”
“I’m fine right here.”
His gaze heated as it raked over me and a slow smile spread across his face. “You are, but that’s not the point. The point is that a man can change. A man can realize that he made a huge mistake when he had a gorgeous, smart, kind and loving woman in his life, his arms and his bed. And, like a fool, he let her walk away.”
“A man can, sure.” I ignored the way my heart fluttered and the little pulse at the base of my neck raced as hope took flight in my belly.
“I am that man, Joss.”
“All evidence to the contrary?”
Ben nodded and took a step closer but this time my feet were rooted to the ground, stubbornly refusing to back down. “The flowers didn’t tell you how I felt?”
“No Ben, those are just things.” I shook my head furiously and my hands unraveled and found themselves back on my hips. “I thought, foolishly, that spending time together when you brought meals or cooked for me, meant something. Turns out it didn’t mean a damn thing.”
“It did, I just didn’t realize it at the time.” Ben sighed and rubbed a hand over his head. “I didn’t know Joss. I didn’t know that every moment we spent together was special, not until you walked away. Which you should have done.”
“Thanks,” I snorted, but my heart was still, waiting for his next words.
“Every smile. Every laugh. Every moment we spent together came back to me in vivid color and that’s how I knew.”
My throat was so dry it was hard to swallow around the lump that had formed in my throat. “Knew what?”
“That’s how I realized that I’m in love with you, Joss.” He huffed out a laugh and shook his head. “It’s crazy how in the moment, those small moments seem so insignificant, like you’ll just have them and live them forever. But then they’re gone and you feel…incomplete.”
Yeah, I knew that feeling. “You. Love. Me.” It didn’t make sense. It couldn’t be true but the gleam in his eyes felt true.
He nodded. “I’m in love with you, Joss. I hate that I had to hurt you to figure that out, but I didn’t know that’s why you were so special. I didn’t know that it was love that caused my heart to ache when you walked away from me. It was rage when I saw you hug that guy at the game.”
“That was my brother. Half brother, anyway.”
He grinned. “Mara set me straight and that’s when I knew I had to make my move. The next guy might not be your brother or your half-brother. He might be some loser trying to steal you away from me.”
“I’m not yours,” I told him, but my heart raced like hell, desperate to be claimed by this man.
“Not yet, no.” He took a cautious step forward, but that irresistible smile had me taking my own step forward. “But you said you loved me, before. I’m hoping that’s still true.”
“Love isn’t a switch you can flip on and off, Ben.”
His grin widened. “That’s what I was hoping you’d say, and that was the reason for the deliveries. I needed you to know that I see you Joss, how special you are. How funny and kind, how dedicated you are to your students and your athletes. I see your beauty whether you’re in sweat pants or a sexy blue dress, or nothing at all.”
“Ben…”
“And I sent the arrangement today, because I wanted you to know that I love you enough to break my own stupid rules. That I don’t care if the whole world knows that I love you. That I want to be with you. More than any damn thing.”
“You do?”
“Damn straight I do, Joss. I wasted too much time making excuses, telling myself that the new teacher was off-limits because we work together. Pretending I didn’t notice you flirting with me or that little blush you got when I said hi to you.”
I rolled my eyes. “You knew.”
“I knew and I had a crush too, but I couldn’t act on it.”
“Wouldn’t,” I shot back, feeling bold with his declaration of love.
