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“I should tell you,” she says. “I’m a virgin.”
Now I freeze solid – truly, freeze. Of all the things I might have expected her to say… a beautiful young woman like her? With that body? Surely, it can’t be true? But I look down at her frightened expression, the innocent and youthful way her wide eyes stare up at me, and I know that she’s telling the truth.
I’m about to open my mouth to say something else, already moving off her, when I hear a knock at the door.
“Boss? I’ve got your dinner.”
Enzo. Just great. Perfect timing, as always.
With a groan, I get up from the bed, heading over to the door to open it and take the food.Chapter TwelveCarinaJust like that, everything I foolishly allowed myself to daydream about shatters into pieces.
I sit up awkwardly as Tommy goes to the door, not wanting to stay in that vulnerable position. I scramble down from the bed, trying to rearrange my clothes, to make sure it doesn’t look as though we were doing what we were just doing.
How could I have been so stupid? It was a miracle that he even kissed me – I should have been satisfied with that. But no, I had to open my big mouth. I had to remind him how much younger than him I am, how much less experienced. I’ve put him off me, now. All the hope I had before is gone.
I hear muttered words at the door, and then Tommy brings in the cart full of food just like always. I take a seat in my armchair, clearing my throat awkwardly. I can still feel his lips on mine, taste his tongue. God, why did I have to ruin everything?
“Why did you move?” Tommy asks, bringing the cart to a stop next to the table.
I stare up at him in surprise. “I can’t eat in bed,” I say.
He smirks. “Well, first of all, you can,” he says. “But who said we’re eating?”
I gawk at him, probably looking like a total idiot. “The food came.”
“Yes. But we were in the middle of something,” Tommy says, looking pointedly over at the bed.
“I thought…” My cheeks flame before I can finish the sentence. I don’t want to say it out loud. It’s too embarrassing.
“What?” Tommy says. He moves to stand in front of me, cocking his head. Somehow, in spite of what we were doing, he barely looks ruffled, still sharp as ever in his suit. “You thought that I’m not interested in you anymore, because you’re a virgin?”
“Yes,” I say, my voice barely more than a whisper. Does he really need me to say it? Does he not think I’ve been humiliated enough already?
“Well, you’re wrong,” Tommy says. I look up at him sharply. Is he playing with me? Being cruel on purpose? “It doesn’t make me think less of you.”
“You froze up,” I say, accusingly. The embarrassment is fading now, perhaps because he’s given me something to feel a bit angry about.
“I was taken aback,” Tommy says. He reaches out a hand and I take it automatically in spite of myself, allowing him to draw me back to my feet. “A woman like you? I didn’t think it was possible that you could still be pure. You must have been fighting the boys off with a stick.”
“No,” I say, my face burning again. My eyes drop to the floor. Now I’m almost sure he’s teasing me. “I’ve never had that kind of attention.”
He laughs again, but it’s not cruel. More… disbelieving. “Come on. There must have been some.” He tilts his head. “Maybe you’re one of those people who can’t tell when someone is attracted to you.”
“I don’t think so,” I say doubtfully.
Tommy’s hand raises my chin until I look up at him. “Well. Can you tell that I’m attracted to you?”
I shiver under his gaze. “I don’t know,” I say again. With him looking at me like that, I’m not sure if I know my own name.
“I am,” he whispers, his breath hot on my neck as he swoops his head to kiss me there. A shiver goes through me, from my head to my toes. A shiver of want, and need, and some kind of magic. “I want you so badly.”
It’s all I can do to gasp quietly, a sound of pure desire, something I didn’t even know I could make.
“But tonight, I restrain myself,” he says. “This isn’t right.”
And just like that, my heart is plummeting down to my feet again.
“Just because I haven’t…” I start, wanting to protest that it’s fine, that it means nothing if I’m inexperienced. But he holds up a hand, silencing me.
“It’s not right for you to have your first time like this,” he goes on. “It should be special, not rushed. I should give you the whole world on a plate before I dare to deserve to take that from you. As much as I want you now, I would be doing you a disservice. It should be an event. Something planned for, to make sure you have everything you need. Everything you want.”
