She doesn’t need to say more.
My embrace senses the rest when I pull her into my arms, realizing how special this day must be for her, coming back to confront memories that are almost as dark and confusing as mine.
“He never contacted you?”
“I think he meant to. Years later, Mom said he was asking about me, after he knew they were over. He was human. He screwed up a lot, but I’ll always love how he’d take story time so seriously and act out the books he read to me before I’d go to sleep. He helped me love reading. And he also passed along this bucket list he always said I had to finish if he couldn’t.”
“Mundane bucket list?”
“Yeah, um, the ordinary places you want to visit that aren’t totally crazy—the places most people have a chance at before they die. Like, I want to go on a date and watch the sun rise in Maui, and I want to eat gelato made by an actual Italian under an orange tree in Sicily. Dad never made it to Hawaii or Italy, and I guess I got a little more specific. But they’re in the crazy bucket for sure.”
“Not crazy. You’ll find plenty of gelato places in New York, as good as Palermo or Catania,” I say, unable to stop looking at the woman in my arms. “What else is on the list? Yours, I mean, not the one you inherited.”
“I want to buy a book from fifty independent bookstores,” she says, totally seriously. “Oh, and I want to get cotton candy at a real fair!”
“You’ve never done that?”
“I went to county fairs when I was little, but I never got cotton candy any time. So I added it on my little mundane list.”
I grit my teeth, knowing that was probably her mother’s doing.
I also wonder if her marriage falling apart fed Julia Sage’s health mania.
“What else is on the crazy list? The interesting one.”
She steps out of my arms and looks at her phone, bringing up the next bookstore on her list, finding directions to it and leading me in that direction.
“Just the usual stuff. Pretty mountains, picturesque oceans, lots of pampering. I want to swim with dolphins or check out sea lions up close. I’d love to see New Zealand if I’m really lucky. But honestly, I’ll settle for anything with cool history or movie scene vibes.”
“Never took you for a dolphin girl, Pages.”
She wrinkles her nose as she grins up at me, her skin freckling from the summer sun. “Maybe you don’t know me that well yet.”
“Book nerd on the outside, marine biologist on the inside. Got it.”
She laughs, and the sound warms me.
“You make me sound more interesting than I am.”
“Not fucking possible.” Before she can drag me too far out of my way, I lean down and kiss her forehead. “I need to head in to the office for a meeting, though. A couple presentations on deck for the ski lodge plans. You’re sure you’ll be okay on your own?”
She raises her eyebrows.
“With books? I’ll be fine, Ethan.”
“See you at home, then. Try not to lose track of time and end up in another dimension.”
“No promises, but go!” She flashes me an adorably wicked look before she waves and runs across the road with her bag knocking against her hip.
Reluctantly, I turn and head to the office several blocks away, speedwalking through the sweltering midday crowds.
Five tortuous hours later—after it feels like my head’s been pushed through a paper shredder and set on fire—I return to my parents’ house via Uber.
Hattie’s still lost in the city’s bookstores. I’m not worried since she’s been sending me photos of her finds nonstop.
When I get home, Margot waits in the living room, a tablet on her lap with some shoe design feeding her damned obsession.
“Hello, Brother,” she says with a sharp smile.
