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His chest rumbled as he laughed. “Thank you, and I agree, but I was asking about the apartment.”
She could draw out the decision and try to talk herself out of it, but what was the point? Moving in here made sense. Feeling a bit wicked, she said, “It depends. Does it come with a regular helping of that, Mr. Jacobi?”
His grin was almost wolfish. “Oh, yes, Ms. Elliott. I can guarantee your full satisfaction whenever you request it.”
“In that case, I’ll take the apartment.” She almost added conditions, like only until after she recovered from birth, but hesitated. The moment was so good, and she didn’t want to ruin it with squabbling. Besides, she might not want to leave after the baby’s birth. Being honest with herself, she might never want to leave, because that would mean giving up what she had with Jake.
Whatever that was. It was fluid and undefined. Frustrating and satisfying. He was everything she could have imagined in the perfect lover, except she hadn’t been looking for a partner. The confliction was exasperating, but she decided there was no sorting it out tonight. Instead, she would just enjoy the moment with her lover.
CHAPTER THREE
Her roommates were thrilled to move uptown, and the three of them settled into Jake’s apartment within a week. She couldn’t bring herself to think of it as her apartment even after living there for a month. It wasn’t that she didn’t feel at home, because the apartment felt more like that than any place she had lived since her father died. It was just a strange environment, and every time she left the apartment, she was reminded she didn’t belong.
Tonight, she was unable to banish that thought from her mind as she stood beside Jake in his elegant living room. Somehow, he had convinced her to be his hostess for a party for his friends, family, and colleagues. Sondra was certain she had refused on multiple occasions, but here she stood in a black velvet dress that hid any swelling of her tummy. There wasn’t anything obvious to anyone else yet, but she could see a difference, and Jake had commented on how firm her stomach had become during one of their nightly sex sessions.
She refused to call it lovemaking, because that would imply love, and while she liked Jake—they were surprisingly compatible and had a good time together—she didn’t love him. She couldn’t allow herself to do so. As much as they had in common, their differences were greater, and it was only a matter of time until they imploded.
It was difficult to remember that as she lay in his bed, or he in hers though. Somehow, she’d found herself staying longer periods of time with him, and he was doing the same. They went to bed together and almost always spent the entire night together. Their things had comingled in each apartment, and she was feeling at ease in his palatial penthouse.
Except tonight. Sondra was the farthest from comfortable she’d ever been. A fake smile hurt her cheeks from the strain to maintain it. She had nodded and murmured assenting sounds so much that she was starting to feel like a marionette. She hated being surrounded by Jake’s social circle. It felt like they could all see she was inferior.
His mother was the worst. She’d shown up with Eleanor in tow, and the ice maiden had thawed slightly for the evening. For the first time, Sondra saw the glimpse of a beautiful woman under the hardened veneer, and she had experienced a flash of jealousy at the idea of Jake working with the cool blonde every day.
That had faded when Jake greeted Eleanor with distant politeness, brushed a kiss on his mother’s cheek, and steered Sondra away as quickly as possible. She might have assumed he didn’t want her interacting with them because she embarrassed him if he hadn’t complained about being unable to escape Eleanor recently. He’d whispered, “Heaven help me, but I think you were right about her wanting me.”
He’d been so horrified that she hadn’t been able to keep in a rich laugh. Sondra had relaxed a bit after that, but each run-in with Whitney or Eleanor left her feeling raw and reminded her she was the daughter of a literature professor who had worked at a small community college his entire career. These people wouldn’t even judge her by that. Instead, they would be salaciously thrilled to learn her mother was in prison and horrified to find her in their midst.
She had to get a handle on the low self-esteem. Sondra made her way to the restroom for a break, freshening her makeup and leaning against the counter for a moment. A few deep breaths restored her calm, and she looked at herself in the mirror.
“You are a strong woman who has worked hard. You’re just as good as they are, and better than some of the narrow-minded ones who would throw around their judgments. You belong here because Jake wants you here, so grow up and stop whining about not fitting in.”
The whispered pep talk improved her mood and gave her a dose of self-confidence that had been lacking all evening. Sondra straightened her shoulders, smoothed her dress, and patted her stomach lightly. This crowd would someday be her son or daughter’s as well. She couldn’t deny her kid the kind of privilege that came with this life. Nor could she foist her own insecurities on the little one. Her baby needed to see a strong, positive role model who was confident among the elite, not one cowering in the bathroom.
She started to open the doorknob when she realized she was visualizing a future where she attended these things regularly. A vision of herself on Jake’s arm, a massive rock on her finger—not that she cared about the carets, but if it was a fantasy, it might as well be a huge diamond—telling the world she belonged with him.
Was that what she wanted? Did she want a future with Jake? Could she adapt to being Mrs. Wallace Whitcomb Jacobi? She stared at her reflection one more time. “Yes,” she said softly. Somehow, Jake was getting through her carefully built walls. She was falling in love with him.
Unsure whether to be happy or depressed, she opened the door a crack, bracing herself to return to the party. Just before she stepped into the hallway, she heard her name and froze.
“Don’t worry, dear. Jake has always enjoyed trying new things. He’ll sample his black floozy for a bit, and then Sondra Elliott will be a thing of the past.”
“I don’t know, Whitney. He seems to really like her, and he never looks at me that way.” Eleanor’s normally icy voice was thick with insecurity and actually broke on the last word.
Sondra might have felt a little sorry for her if Eleanor hadn’t been plotting with his mother to get her out of Jake’s life.
“She’ll be gone soon enough. His father was the same way. He always had an inappropriate taste for the ethnic women in our employment. It got to the point where I could only hire men or white women. Do you know how hard it is to find a white maid? Then it got to the point that I didn’t care about his dalliances if they were discreet, because he was out of my bed, and I still had the most important thing from him.”
“Jake?” asked Eleanor.
“No, darling.” Whitney’s laugh sent chills down Sondra’s spine. “His bank account, of course.”
Eleanor laughed too. “I’m sure that went a long way toward easing the sting of infidelity.”
“You have no idea,” said Whitney with another cold laugh. “You’re a pragmatic girl, Eleanor, and my best friend’s daughter. I will see you married to Wallace, and no cheap floozy will get in the way of that. She will be out of his life in a flash. There might always be another slut filling the void, but there will only be one wife. You. My son will eventually realize he needs a good girl with impeccable breeding to
give him heirs. You might not have his love, but you will have his name, his bank account, and his children.”
“That’s more than anyone could ask for,” purred Eleanor.
To her relief, the two vultures moved on down the hallway a moment later, allowing Sondra to make her escape. Somehow, she got through the rest of the evening, maintaining a bright smile and a confident attitude.
Each time she caught a glimpse of the two women plotting against her, it renewed her resolve to thwart them. It wasn’t a childish competition, or a refusal to bow down before them, that prompted her reaction. Well, maybe a bit, but her primary motivation was Jake. He had no idea what kind of shark his mother was, and what barracuda she had introduced into his tank.
Sondra might only be a guppy, but she cared about him in a way Eleanor didn’t. That, along with the baby in her stomach, made her willing to go against the sharks to protect her man.
All the aquatic analogies were making her crave sushi. Sondra giggled and moved closer to Jake as they started easing people toward the door.
He paused to press a kiss to her cheek before whispering in her ear, “What’s funny, love?”
“Nothing, really. I was just craving some sushi.”
“Your wish is my command. Let me get rid of these hangers-on, and I’ll have my personal chef whip you up some.”
Sondra grinned. “I should say no to such extravagance.”
He lightly patted her stomach before maneuvering them around a group of people gathering their bags and wraps. “If not for you, then for him.”
“Yes.” If not for herself, then she had to fight for him. Not the baby, but the other him who had become such a huge part of her life in such a short time. Leaning against him, she spoke impulsively, “I think I’m falling in love with you, Jake.”
