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Two Weeks Later
Rand paused, scenting the wind. He looked down the slope of the hill, to where the younger wolves were currently pulling apart and devouring the deer that he, Fane and Stalker had brought down. They had a second one, untouched, they'd bring home, to store the meat the way a human would. Another of the many ways they smoothly straddled two different worlds.
They had a good setup here. A good life.
He was miserable.
He shouldn't be, damn it. Cai's note had been clear. They were friends, brothers-in-arms, if ever he had need of him, he'd be there for him. It was similar to what Cai had said when he'd figured out the infinity mark on Rand's wrist. He'd even drawn a simple replica at the top of the note, a reminder to Rand.
The vampire had finished up the note with some stuff like how maybe their paths would cross again soon. Blah blah blah. If all that was true, the bastard would have told him that in person, clapped him on the back, indulged one more intense fuck and been on his way. He'd literally fled after that dinner. A dinner where the guy who was as emotionally repressed as a brick wall had put everything out there for all to see. For Rand.
Rand had wanted to go after him, soon as he received the note, but he'd thought it through and hadn't. Because everything Cai had said, whether it was bullshit on his side of things or not, could very likely be true for Rand.
These were his people. No question. The ache over Sheba and Dylef and the pups would never be gone. It would hit him hard when he least expected it, and those nightmares would come and go, forcing him to relive it. But during his time with Cai, it had lessened enough that his self-destructive urges couldn't take the upper hand, and he could feel good things about life again. Thanks to Cai, Rand could be part of a pack again.
His leg was still giving him trouble. Which meant him hunting in a pack wasn't a bad thing, since he doubted he could have caught the deer on his own over open ground. Fane and Stalker had handled the running and directing. Rand had trailed behind--just behind, but still behind--until the kill point, and then Rand had jumped in.
He'd agreed to the X-rays Sangra recommended and meeting with her alternative healing contacts, but he'd anticipated the outcome. None of them had direct experience with what they diagnosed as the problem. An injury infected with strong magic needed to be healed by a magical healer who understood that specific kind of magic
The limp wasn't bad, and he managed to pull his weight just fine in the pack, so he asked Sangra to let it be, for now. Even with the handicap, he was considered the next beta in line behind Stalker. At full strength, he would have stepped into the role of Fane's top beta with no objections from Fane's son. They all knew he was really an alpha being a polite pack member.
But this worked. He had no problem deferring to Fane or Stalker. He trusted their judgment. Rand didn't have to be chief, but he could be if needed, his injury notwithstanding. That knowledge brought Fane peace. Though they'd crafted a pretty safe world here, and were growing a strong pack, Fane only had to look as far as Rand's experience to know it was important to be prepared for the worst to happen.
With Rand present, Fane's pack now had backup if something happened to Fane, and Stalker needed the mature guidance of an older male. Or even during the times that were more mundane, like Fane being gone on temporary trips with Chad, who worked together with him on his lucrative carpentry business.
But in his heart, Rand knew he was padding. Overall, their world was decently secure, well connected to the human one where those threads were needed. Stalker was almost equal to Fane in strength. Todd, Cilya and Sangra more than pulled their weight, and the teenagers were only a few years out from being able to contribute in their own way to the pack's overall strength.
But function wasn't all that a pack was about. It was also about family, and wolves loved a big family. He was accepted with no qualms. They knew girls weren't his thing and no one commented on it. Not ignored, like they didn't want to talk about it. It simply was, and nothing needed to be said.
He wasn't a monk. He would need male company in time, but he could drive to the nearest town, where there were plenty of opportunities for hook-ups.
An idea which made him nauseous. He needed that male company now, but he didn't want "male company." He wanted one particular male. One excessively foul-mouthed, cynical, sarcastic, strangely honorable, foolishly brave and touchingly vulnerable at unexpected moments, male. A male whose commanding touch he craved, even as he felt the desire to hunt him down to stay close, protect him from his worst enemy--himself. They had that in common, didn't they? They both needed the occasional reminder to pull their heads out of their asses.
Ever since Cai had left, Rand had to tamp down an anxious pulling in his gut, like Rand wasn't where he needed to be, with the person he needed to be with.
That could easily be explained by biology. In his note, Cai had told him he'd left Brian what was needed to end the marking. After Rand read the note, he sat there for a while, quelling the desire to search the grounds--as Cai might say--like Lassie frantically trying to figure out where Timmy had fallen down the well. After a time, he'd left his room with its smell of Cai in the bed linens, and gone to find Lord Brian.
Rand's mind went back to that last night at the mansion, to that conversation and his decision. Which would have been unexpected, except...it really wasn't, was it?
"We still don't have many of these requests, but it must be requested by the vampire," Lord Brian said. He frowned. "Cai left direction that it would be done, if it was your wish. That he was indifferent to the decision. Which is rather unorthodox and suggests the exact opposite to me. While the nature of that lies between the two of you, a bond remaining between a separated vampire and servant can be problematic, especially where the servant's memory of the bond is not going to be blocked. It requires Council approval. I spoke to Lady Lyssa."
That caused a spurt of uneasiness in Rand, especially when Brian paused, as if considering what was appropriate to say to a servant.
"She told me that due to Cai's youth and his relative unimportance, requiring the separation is not as critical to the Council as it would be normally." Brian shook his head as Rand scowled. "I'm not insulting your Master. She meant he isn't a highly placed overlord or one whose servant's unsupervised connection could make the vampire world more vulnerable. The memory block is not required for you because you're not human. You understand the gravity of revealing the nature of beings that humans convince themselves don't exist."
Translation: If you rat on us, we rat on you. It wasn't said that explicitly or unkindly. More a sensible practicality Rand understood. Unwittingly, Brian had also confirmed that they didn't suspect Cai's magical abilities. If they had known about that, particularly the fertility angle, Rand expected Cai's political importance would have skyrocketed.
"So the decision remains with you," Brian continued. "There are complications, if you're not having the mark removed and you and your Master won't be together. The mark creates a magnetism, if you will, between the vampire and servant. When separated, you'll experience an anxiety, in greater or lesser amounts, depending on your personality or environmental stressors. Over time, you can learn to manage it, but it will be uncomfortable at first."
Rand considered. "Does he experience it?"
Brian hesitated. Debra's head lifted from her microscope at the question, her gaze on her Master unfathomable. "Vampires experience it to a lesser degree, for the most part," Brian said. "Particularly if they view the bond as more functional. But if they have grown attached to their servant, yes, they will experience it."
Rand frowned. "How can you tell what's from the marking, and what's simply missing each other?"
Debra suppressed a smile. Brian cast her a wry but fond look and lifted a shoulder. "I deal in science. The realm of the heart is a powerful but completely unquantifiable measurement. I leave that answer to your own speculation. But thank you for the reminder that science can never cover all th
e variables."
"One day, with the right brilliant mind, it just might," Debra pointed out, letting her smile show. Brian snorted.
"Time will tell," he said. "But if I had to guess which scientist here would figure out the universal equation, I would have to defer to my servant's intelligence...and female intuition. It has often progressed our work in ways I didn't expect."
Debra flushed and shook her head at him before returning to what she was doing. Brian looked at Rand. "So, do you wish the mark removed?" He lifted a generous vial of blood. "Cai left this to facilitate things. We've made improvements to the process recently where we create a profile from his blood and your physiology to determine how to tailor the separation serum more closely to your bond. I just need to know if you want us to begin, since that procedure is fairly labor-intensive."
Rand knew the smart thing to do. What did it matter? Cai could always mark him again, right? If their paths crossed in the future, and things were different, and they both wanted... Though that time it would stay permanent, because it was clear this procedure was a rare and by Council-approval type thing. They didn't do it like returns at Walmart.
He'd thought about it ever since reading Cai's note. Waffled on the way here. Thought about all the variables, even during Brian's explanation. But when it came down to it, Rand trusted his wolf more than he trusted his human side. So he asked that part of his heart, and the wolf's answer came without hesitation.
"Thanks," he said. "But I want to keep the marks. Um...can I have the blood, if you're not going to use it?"
With a neutral look, Brian handed it over. "Thanks." Rand nodded. "I'll be leaving shortly. Is there anything...do I need to sign out?"
Brian's lips twitched. "No. If your Master has already departed, then your business here is concluded. Do you have transportation to where you're going?"
