AllFreeNovel
Share Us
Julie took a scone. "If you keep feeding me like this, I am going to become a very round theater manager."
Madison cocked a brow. "Okay, that time you cut your eyes away from me. You did something with Des other than the orchid date that wasn't a date, didn't you? Did you do the rope session with him?" When Julie refused to say, focused on chewing, Madison hmphed. "Hence the Grand Canyon question. And the type of math you mentioned is the area of union of two intersecting circles. Geometry."
"Do not practice your mathematical wiles on me. Let's ask Troy to come over and model some underwear." Julie looked toward one of the wall displays in Madison's shop. "Ooh, or that harness thing. We could test body oils on him."
"Shale put a halt to any experimentation on Troy. I'm only allowed to do that if she or Logan is present. Spoilsport bitch."
"Which one of them, Logan or Shale?" Julie grinned. "And she only put the kibosh on you. I can say it's a skit idea for the upcoming show."
Troy was Logan's hardware store employee, as well as a submissive for the stunning and intimidating Mistress Shale. Shale and Troy were part of the Consent cast, so Julie had had the pleasure of getting to know both of them better, enough to enjoy teasing them in absentia, like now.
Madison's shop was closed today, the front drapes drawn so they weren't disturbed by the sidewalk traffic. One of their reasons for meeting here had been to go over things in the erotica boutique they would be using as props in the upcoming show.
"In your dreams, girl. I'd advise you to keep your greedy paws off Troy's body. I've seen what Shale can do with a whip." Madison sobered, reaching across her glass display counter to touch Julie's hand. "Seriously, what's going on? You look a little miserable. Was Des unkind? Does Logan need to break his legs?"
"No. Far from it. He's amazing. Too much, really." Julie put down her scone.
Madison's friendly openness, the kind expression on her face, were a welcome invitation to open up about the chaos of feelings Julie had been experiencing since what had happened with Des. She hadn't seen him in several days, though it wasn't because he'd dropped her like a hot potato. He'd left her a couple of messages and inquiring texts, gentle leads to give her space but welcome her communications.
She'd responded generally but she guessed she'd done a good job at indicating she needed a little space, because he hadn't pushed. Though she wondered if that was because it didn't matter to him what the sub whose world he'd rocked was doing. She was just one of many subs with whom he'd done scenes. It was stupid of her to resent that, since she'd stated up front that was what she'd intended their session to be. Just a session. But she hadn't expected it to feel...the way it had. World rocking. She hadn't expected to feel this way about him.
She hated this insecure side of herself, but Madison was in a position to understand it better than anyone. Julie didn't know if that made things better or worse.
She started with halting sentences before pouring it all out in her usual circular, free flow way that could tie a listener's brain in knots. Fortunately, Madison kept pace with her. Her road with Logan had been zigzag, double-back and upside down, too, though he'd helped her find her way forward again.
Was that something that all Doms had, or just the really good ones? The ability to steady a submissive soul? And did they also always leave that soul so flipped out and feeling out of control once the session was done?
"Yeah, at first," Madison said. "In session, you have this mind-shattering experience. Outside it, you have to wrap your mind around what happened, what it all means, how it will impact your world, and what does this guy really want from me, blah, blah, blah."
"That sums it up," Julie said glumly. "But that's the thing, Madison. It was incredible, it really was, but it happened so fast and so smoothly, I can't tell if it's like a doctor's office. The doctor knows his role, and steps into it with all this authority, and we understand our role as patient. But when we leave, here comes another patient. I don't know if I can handle that this guy can give me this incredible experience, and yet I'm just one of many incredible experiences he hands out like ice cream from the back of a truck on a summer day."
"Have you asked him to clarify?"
"Uh, no. I have no desire to be the woman who says 'Hey, I know we met about a minute ago, but I'm just wondering. That mind shattering orgasmic experience you gave me? Was that headed on the road to permanent commitment, a shared apartment and adopting a dog together, or was it more in the hippie category of a great LSD trip, aka let's do it again when we're both in the mood, sometime, maybe?' I am so done with being the clingy, strangle a commitment out of somebody, kind of girl."
She stood up.
"I said I wasn't going to get into any more goddamn, freaking relationships, so why am I thinking about him like this?"
She shook her head, holding up a hand before Madison could answer. "I have a hard enough time with vanilla relationships and not screwing them up. I don't have the strength for this. I should just let it go. I can't become part of his harem."
Madison tapped her fingers on the glass counter. "Okay and fine, if he did take you at your word and it was just a session for him. But what if he's genuinely interested in you?"
The leap in her chest at the idea was far too immediate and schoolgirl crush crazy. "Why would he be?" Julie retorted. "It's far more likely he just wants to encourage me to do more sessions with him, so I can be another fascinating submissive experience. He'd walk away after a few more times, and I'd be blown away by it. Quite literally, with me looking for the pieces for the next five years. But that's not what I'm looking for."
"What are you looking for then?"
"Nothing," Julie said bluntly. "Nothing anymore. Let's go shopping."
On Monday, she'd decided she should reinforce her point by oh-so-casually telling Des she'd really enjoyed their time together, but that was all she needed in terms of firsthand experience on rigging. Closure, end of story. Over the weekend, by firmly blocking any memory of his touch, voice, scent or otherwise overwhelmingly masculine attributes, she'd been able to regain perspective, and she knew what she'd told Madison was right. She just had to hold on to that. He wasn't interested in her like that, and she wasn't interested in thinking otherwise.
Okay, yeah, she was, but what had captured her was the first, exciting, wonderful, lighter-than-air feelings that happened with infatuation. She wasn't interested in the soul-sucking crash and burn that always happened afterward. If the cookie was poisoned, say no to the cookie. The two couldn't be separated.
Regardless, there was no time to deal with it today. The lights and sound equipment had arrived, along with a few of the scenery pieces and larger props. The theater was overrun with students setting up the technical elements, as well as carpenters, electricians and a few cast members providing extra hands. Tomorrow the full cast would start doing the run-throughs in the theater with the sound and lighting in place. Prior to this, they'd been meeting at Harris's house as a temporary rehearsal studio, since his Mistresses had a large basement for both home dungeon and rec room.
Like her, her stage manager was a tornado of energy today. He was making constant updates to his production book, which he maintained on his tablet and file shared with her and the volunteers who would be in charge of light, sound and scenery cues during the performances.
"Hey, Julie." He buzzed her on the radio, since she was in the lobby with the house manager. "We've almost got Pablo's frame set up and Des texted me. He's going to come by shortly to review the rigging stuff with Pablo like you wanted."
