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That comment was no help at all. And then the rest of the dinner guests joined them, and it was impossible to get away, so she sat and talked and ate and danced, as if everything were as it should be.
When the royal party left, it was a sign that everyone else could leave, but she had to be sure that Khalid wouldn’t disappear again when they reached his London home. ‘Can we talk when we get back?’ she pressed as he escorted her out of the ballroom.
‘Of course,’ he reassured her with a slight frown. ‘I hadn’t forgotten you wanted to speak to me.’
Though he could have no idea about the subject of that talk, she thought as he helped her into the rear seat of the royal limousine, with its flag of Khalifa flying proudly from the roof. And a uniformed chauffeur seated only feet away from them, which made confidential conversation impossible.
‘You’re very quiet,’ Khalid commented as they drove smoothly through the London streets. Raising the privacy panel between them and the driver, he turned to face her. ‘What’s wrong, Millie?’
‘I’m just tired,’ she said, unable to meet his eyes. Telling him such momentous news in the back of a car, however grand, didn’t sit with her any better than in a crowded ballroom.
‘And you look quite pale,’ he observed as the street lights flickered across her face. ‘But I don’t buy you being tired. You were the star of the ball. Adrenalin must be pumping through your veins.’
And it was, Millie thought, but for all the wrong reasons. After the intimacies they’d shared, telling Khalid that she was pregnant should have been the easiest thing on earth, but instead it was turning out to be the hardest.
‘What is this mystery?’ he asked. There was a pause, and then he said, ‘Are you pregnant?’
Millie gave an audible gasp. Never one to shirk the truth, she could do no more than admit, ‘Yes, I am.’ She could only wait for his reaction and play off that, but Khalid remained silent until they reached his London home, where he helped her out of the limousine as if he’d learned nothing unusual that night, and ushered her up the steps with his usual care.
‘Ten minutes,’ he said, turning to face her when his butler opened the door.
She watched him jog up the magnificent mahogany staircase. He didn’t look round, and there was no offer of a steadying hand. It should have been a relief to have her wonderful news out in the open, but instead she felt more diminished than ever as she stood in the magnificent vaulted hall.
Rubbish! She was about to become a mother. And that took guts. This was no time for feeling anything other than confident about the future. Once she had reassured Khalid she wouldn’t make any call on him, he was sure to see she meant it and be relieved.
* * *
A child. They were having a child. Shocked at the enormity of this turn of events, he was fiercely excited. A baby was the natural consequence of so much sex, he reflected, and however careful he’d been, there had been times...
Releasing his grip on the back of the chair, he began to pace his study. He needed time to think. Ten minutes wasn’t long enough. This was as much emotion as he’d ever felt. Having grown up in a home where displays of emotion were frowned upon, his older brother, Saif, had been indulged, while Khalid, as the younger son, and by far the more spirited child, had largely been ignored, and consigned to the care of servants. By the age of seven he had learned not to yearn for the love of his parents, and had known that he would have to make his own way in the world. He’d studied hard to be the best he could be, and had gone on to serve his country in the forces, before going into business. Saif had never shown any interest in the sapphire mines, only in spending the money they produced, so it had been up to Khalid to bail out the royal treasury.
Duty remained as vital to him now as it had been then. The chance to have anything more than a formal royal life had never occurred to him, but before he could reassure Millie, he must open Pandora’s box. He had no option now, but telling her everything about that night was a risk. It could destroy her; destroy all the trust she’d built and the confidence she’d gained. Withholding the truth would almost certainly drive her away from him, but he would never contemplate building a child’s future on lies and evasion.
* * *
Having received the call to join Khalid in his study, she knew after he’d only been talking for a few minutes why he had wanted to keep things formal between them. ‘Let me get this straight,’ she said, holding up a hand to silence him. ‘You’ve been receiving reports on me since that night?’ She hated the way her voice quavered with shock.
‘Every school report,’ he confirmed evenly, as if this were completely normal, ‘and every course you ever took. Every friend you made—’
‘How dare you snoop on me like that?’ she demanded, incensed.
‘You were made an orphan that night,’ he continued, ignoring her outburst, ‘and I hold myself responsible for that. I felt protective towards you from the start, and I couldn’t just turn my back on you and walk away.’
‘So you paid for everything throughout my entire life.’
He remained silent.
‘You thought it your duty,’ she guessed bitterly.
‘Miss Francine was more than eager to give you a home,’ he argued in the same calm tone. ‘She was already very fond of you, but that isn’t an excuse for either of us to expect an elderly woman to bear the additional cost of housing you.’
‘I never did,’ Millie exploded. How dared he suggest such a thing? ‘I always paid my way.’
‘Yes, you did,’ he agreed, ‘but Miss Francine’s finances were perilously balanced, and she still refused to take any money from me. The least I could do was cover your education.’
‘So my scholarships—’
‘You earned every one of them,’ he stated firmly. ‘Khalifa does not bestow grants where they are not deserved.’
‘Khalifa?’ One shock on top of another. ‘I thought my awards came from the college. There was never any mention of Khalifa.’
‘Nothing is ever done in Khalifa to garner public acclaim. Everything is low-key.’
The way he liked it, she thought, still trying to come to terms with the fact that Khalid of Khalifa had been
a major player in her life since the day of her mother’s tragic death.
There was a question she had to ask him. ‘Was it guilt that made you do this?’
‘Partly, yes,’ he admitted.
‘I would rather you’d told the truth to the court, than be here now.’
‘I did tell the truth to the court.’
He had just left a lot out, knowing it would make the headlines and those headlines would live for ever, taunting Millie with the truth of her mother’s death.
‘You told your version of the truth,’ she accused him.
‘Doesn’t everyone?’ He opened his arms wide. ‘The truth is always open to interpretation.’
‘Not in my world,’ she shot back bitterly.
‘Some facts aren’t helpful, Millie.’
‘Like those that prove your brother guilty of murder?’ she suggested with a short, humourless laugh.
‘Someone else pushed your mother. I told you that it was her dealer.’
‘But your brother drove my mother to the edge—he held that party—his guests mocked my mother. Whatever your lawyers said in court about my mother’s fate being in her own hands—her own shaking hands,’ she added hotly, ‘surely someone could have saved her! You should have saved her! I should have—’
‘You’re torturing yourself unnecessarily,’ he said as she broke off.
‘Says the man who fathered my child!’ she raged. ‘You lied to me, Khalid. You’ve been lying to me since the day the Sapphire sailed back into King’s Dock. I should have gone with my gut then, and stayed away from you.’
‘Your gut told you to see me,’ he argued quietly. ‘And you did the right thing. You’ve never turned your back on a problem yet, so why start now?’
‘Some things are better avoided? And you’re one of them! Why couldn’t you just tell me that you were going to be part of my life?’
‘Would you have preferred me to feed the scandal sheets?’
‘I would have preferred the truth,’ she flared. ‘It makes me wonder what else you’re hiding,’ she added with an acid glare. ‘You saved your brother—’
