That man is making me crazy.
I know that I acted like a child at that practice forum, but he crawled under my skin like an infection pulsing through my veins, changing my chemistry. And I’m still not over it. In fact, I’m stillreally on it, as if that practice forum was a mountain I hiked up and I refuse to climb back down.
But this trip…this book tour,issupposed to be the beginning of everything for me.
All I have to do is survive Evan.
“You’ll do great, Rach. You deserve this,” Mal assures me.
I nod.
“He’s not that bad,” Mal continues. “Remember, this is a business trip meant to launch your own career. Your dreams are coming true, even if it doesn’t look the way you thought it would.”
“You’re right,” I agree. “I don’t know why I’m so worried about it.”
“It’s because people are going to see you, finally! They are going to see you like I see you, Rach, and they are going to love you!” she exclaims.
I know I’m a good writer. I don’t know why my fanfiction was noticed instead of the manuscripts I’ve been sending to agents for six years, but Ihavebeen noticed.
“What time does your plane leave?” Mal questions, picking up Wonton to snuggle him against her face.
If I did that, he’d pluck my eyeballs out of their sockets with his claws.
“Two,” I reply, picking up my carry-on to secure it to the handle of my checked bag. “Uber will be here in about ten minutes.”
“Only give your best, Rach. You don’t want your hate for Evan to look like hate for the opportunity,” Mal says. “Five things you’re grateful for?”
“Opportunity. A bag full of dresses. Having a comma in my bank account. Getting to explore new cities. And you,” I answer with a smile.
“I’m grateful for you, too, Rach,” Mal replies. “Now get out of here. Dreams are for doers.”
I throw my arms around Mal, careful to keep my face away from Wonton’s paws. “I love you.”
“I love you, too,” Mal says as she pulls back from me, her eyes watering.
I feel a tear slip down my cheek. A genuine moment.
This trip might change everything. I might come back and leave Mal. My Mal, who sees the best in me and knows my worst. There have been very few people that have chosen to love me for both my sunshine and my darkness. Usually people only want my smile; they don’t know what to do with the rest of me. With my sharp edges. Or my mood swings. Or the neediness I pretend I don’t have.
They want the woman who makes jokes and lifts the room, not the one who overthinks texts or spirals after a bad dream. They want the cheerleader on the sideline, not the girl who had to cheer herself through eight years of walking on eggshells.
But Mal knows, and she’s stayed with me.
I think that’s the part that breaks me the most. Love like that shouldn’t surprise me as much as it does. Like it’s an accident instead of something I deserve.
I blink hard and step back, brushing my cheeks before I say softly, “To dreams.”
“To dreams,” Mal repeats. “Go get yours.”
I pull my luggage to the front door of our small apartment and look back to see Mal using Wonton as a tissue. I give her one last smile before shutting the door behind me.
Chapter 11
Evan
She’slate,andItry not to let it bother me. If she’s late, it’s her fault. Not mine.
I’ve been sitting at our gate for over an hour with a large coffee in hand, watching as airplanes come and go. I prefer being early so I can choose the best place to sit. Being late has cost me too much in the past. Tardiness wasn’t ever a luxury I had, and even though I have it now, my internal clock is trained to timeliness.
