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“There’s someone else,” he said. Not a question. A statement.
“S-someone…? A boyfriend, you mean? From before? No. Never. I wouldn’t-”
“Go out with me if there was. I know. ” He took another step back, the heat of his body fading, the chill of night air moving in. “I don’t mean a guy from before, Chloe. I mean one from now. ”
I stared at him. Now? Who else…? There was only one other guy-
“D-Derek? Y-you think-”
I couldn’t finish. I wanted to laugh. You think I like Derek? Are you kidding? But the laugh wouldn’t come, just this thundering in my ears, breath catching like I’d been smacked in the chest.
“Derek and I aren’t-”
“No, not yet. I know. ”
“I-I don’t-”
Just say it. Please let me say it. “I don’t like Derek. ”
But I didn’t. Couldn’t.
Simon jammed his hands into his pockets and we stood there in that awful silence until I managed to say, “It isn’t like that. ”
“It wasn’t. Not at first. ” He stared out at the woods. “It started to change after the crawl space. You guys hanging out together, the…vibe changing. I told myself I was just imagining it. When you and Tori escaped from the lab, it seemed like I was right. But then, after the truck stop, when you guys came back…” He went quiet, then looked over at me. “I’m right, aren’t I?”
There was a note of pleading in his voice. Tell me I’m wrong, Chloe. Please. And everything in me wanted to say it. This was Simon. Everything I’d ever dreamed of in a boyfriend and here he was, mine for the taking. I only had to say the words, and I tried. I tried. But all I could manage was another weak, “It’s not like that. ”
“Yeah, it is. ”
He started to walk away, back in the direction we’d come. Then he stopped and, without turning, he reached into his jacket and held out a rolled-up paper, murmuring, “This is for you. ”
I took it, and he continued walking.
Fingers shaking, I unrolled the paper. It was the picture he’d drawn of me, now colored. It looked even better than it had in the sketch. I looked better. Confident and strong and beautiful.
The picture blurred as my eyes filled with tears. I quickly rerolled it before I ruined it. I took a few steps after him and called out. I could see his figure in the distance, still walking, and I knew he heard me, but he didn’t stop.
Seventeen
I WATCHED SIMON WALK away, then wiped my eyes with my sleeve and headed for the lights of the house. I’d just passed the edge of the woods when the rear door opened, light spilling into the nearly dark yard. Then a hulking figure blocked the light.
“No,” I whispered. “Not now. Just go back inside-”
The door slapped shut, sound echoing as Derek marched across the yard, dead on target.
I looked around, desperate for an escape route, but there was none. Go forward and deal with Derek, or run back toward Simon and have to deal with both of them. I kept walking.
“Where’s Simon?” he snapped.
Relief washed through me. I didn’t trust myself to speak, so I just pointed back to the woods.
“He left you? Out here? At night?”
“He dropped something,” I mumbled, trying to get past him. “He isn’t far. ”
Without a sound, he was right in front of me, blocking my path.
“You’re crying?” he said.
“No, I-” I tore my gaze away. “Just dust. From the path. Simon’s that way. ”
I tried to pass him, but he stooped, trying to get a look at my face. When I wouldn’t let him, he caught my chin. I jerked back, flinching at his touch, heart thudding at it, too.
I told myself Simon was wrong. I’d never be dumb enough to fall for Derek. But I had. With him so close, my stomach kept doing weird little flips. It wasn’t fear. It hadn’t been fear for a while.
“You have been crying,” he said, voice softer. Then his breath caught, the growl coming back as he snapped, “What did Simon-?” He bit off the words, cheeks reddening like he was embarrassed even to think Simon might be responsible.
“What happened?” he said.
“Nothing. It just didn’t work out. ”
“Didn’t work out?” He spoke slowly, like he was processing a foreign language. “Why?”
“Talk to Simon. ”
“I’m talking to you. What’d you do to him?”
I stiffened. Only he was right. I had done something to Simon. I’d hurt him. And for what? Some stupid crush on a guy who barely tolerated me most of the time? Was that the kind of girl I was? Pick the jerk over the nice guy?
“I screwed up. Again. You’re shocked, I’m sure. Now, let me go inside-”
He blocked me. “What’d you do, Chloe?”
I sidestepped. He sidestepped.
“You like him, don’t you?” he said.
“Yes, I like him. Just not…”
“Not what?”
“Talk to Simon. He’s the one who thinks…”
“Thinks what?”
Step. Block.
“Thinks what?”
“That there’s someone else,” I blurted before I could stop myself. I took a deep, shuddering breath. “He thinks there’s someone else. ”
“Who?”
I was going to say “I don’t know. Some guy from school, I guess. ” But Derek’s expression said he already knew the answer. The look on his face…It’d been humiliating before, having Simon accuse me of liking Derek, but that was nothing compared to how I felt when I saw Derek’s look. Not just surprise, but shock. Shock and horror.
“Me?” he said. “Simon said he thinks you and I are-”
“No, not that. He knows we aren’t-”
“Good. So what does he think?”
“That I like you. ” Again, the words flew out before I could stop them. This time, I didn’t care. I’d completely humiliated myself, and now I was just empty and ashamed. All I wanted was to get him out of my way, and if telling him that made him run in terror, then good.
But he didn’t run. He just stared at me, and that was worse. I felt like the biggest loser at school, admitting to the coolest guy that she liked him. He stood there gaping like he must have heard me wrong.
