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But it wasn't okay. I had to find him. I had to--
Suddenly, I couldn't move. I jerked awake to find myself in bed with someone behind me, arms around me. My hands flew up--
"Whoa! It's me. No lethal spells, please."
I twisted to see a familiar figure sitting at the edge of my bed, his boyish face and dark eyes uncharacteristically solemn.
"Adam?"
"Key," he said, holding it up. "From Jesse. And I checked to make sure you were decent before I came in. I was sitting over there--" He pointed to the chair, a textbook now resting on it. "You were having a nightmare. When it wasn't going away, I thought I'd better wake you up."
I blinked and wiped my hand over my face. My fingers came back damp
. I glanced across the room and saw my reflection in the mirror, hair snarled, mascara running, face streaked with tears.
"Yep, you look like shit," Adam said. "And I took plenty of pictures, which I will keep until an appropriate opportunity for blackmail arises."
When I turned, he reached over and pulled me into a fierce hug. I resisted, but when he whispered, "It's okay. I won't tell," I collapsed against him. He just held me, and I needed that. God, how I needed that. I knew then that this wasn't about whether or not I could handle the case professionally. It was personal--right now, I needed a friend.
When I got myself under control, he still held me there, and whispered, "Jesse tells me you went out with him last night. The detective. Michael."
I nodded.
"I'm sorry." His arms tightened around me. "I'm so sorry."
I backed up then, wiping my sleeve over my eyes. "It's just ... He was ... He was a nice guy. God, that sounds lame but ... He was just ... really nice."
"You liked him," Adam said softly.
I lowered my gaze and nodded. "It wasn't--I just ... I ..."
"You liked him."
I nodded. "And I feel ..." I took a deep breath, then blurted out the words I'd been holding in all day. "I feel like I could have stopped it. He wanted to come in last night and I said no. I was goofing around, holding him off and ... But it's not just that. I gave him a lead about Cody and I think he was following it and I ... I shouldn't have given him any leads. If I thought there was a supernatural connection, then I was putting him in danger. He walked into something he knew nothing about and got killed for it."
"You had no way of knowing that could happen."
I looked at him. "Didn't I? Sure, it's not like I thought hmm, this could be dangerous for a human' and gave him the tip anyway. But I should have stopped and thought about it."
"Do you know for certain that he was following up on the lead you gave him?"
"No, but--"
"Did you think that lead about a delivery had any supernatural connection?"
"No, but--"
"Then stop beating yourself up over it."
When I tried to get off the bed, he tugged me back down and turned me to look at him. "You aren't responsible, Savannah. You gave him what you thought was a clean lead. He may or may not have been following it. And as for saving him by inviting him to bed ..."
I glowered. "I didn't mean it like that. Just that I keep thinking--"
"--of all the things you could have done differently. And for all you know, you could have invited him in, and he would have gone to that warehouse later anyway. Or you would have gone with him and gotten both of you killed. So the next time you think about letting a guy stay the night, remember that sex probably won't save his life. Even really good sex."
I lifted my fingers, making them spark.
"Hey, two can play that game, remember." He made a fist, then spread his fingers, the tips glowing red. "And mine leave bigger burns."
