“Nope, whatever you’re going to say, don’t.” Aaron puts a hand up and shakes his head. “You might not have fourteen years under your belt with him, but he’s your boyfriend.” It’s weird hearing someone else say that word. I’m not sure I’ve even said it out loud other than in a discussion with Matthias. Only in my head—repeatedly. “If you called him, he would’ve dropped everything and come running. And, if for some reason he couldn’t, he’d have called one of us.” I open my mouth to say something, but Aaron cuts me off again. “And any one of us would have come to get you. No questions asked.”
“So, we could say that it worked out the same?” I’m starting to question whether I made the right choice tonight. Matthias works hard, and I know he’s got a big interview coming up for a promotion. I’m also aware that I take up a lot of his time. Not only with fun dating things but also studying. Sometimes, he sits next to me and works, but often, he’s helping me better understand my calculus homework. With finals, the time we spent on me went way up. I love that he’s willing to give me that, but I also feel guilty that he’s neglecting things that are important to him. Things he’s worked hard for.
Aaron shakes his head and laughs. “I don’t think he’s going to see it that way. Look, I know Matthias can be a little overprotective.” I nearly choke on my sip of coffee. When I catch Aaron’s eye, I can tell he knows that Matthias is a—my Daddy. “But it’s because he cares so much about you.”
“I know. I just don’t want to screw things up,” I admit.
“I get that, more than you might think.” For a moment, I wonder if he had a crush on Matthias at some point, but the look on his face says that he’s thinking about someone else. “I think the biggest way you can mess this thing up is by not being all in. And all in for Matthias means letting him help you with your problems. Even if you sometimes have to tell him to back the fuck off and listen.”
Yeah, I can’t imagine saying that to him, but it’s not bad advice. I’m used to fending for myself and figuring out how to put things together. It’s not that I don’t want help. It’s that no one has ever reliably been there to help me. At least not without a lot of yelling. Dealing with all of it on my own is easier, safer.
“Did Matthias tell you about the time I got stuck in a tree?”
“What?” I’m not sure I heard him correctly.
“Yep, back in college. I had this big engineering project that I was working on. I got it in my head that I wanted to build a pulley system that would… never mind, the details aren’t important. What’s important is that I needed a space high enough to test things. Most of the windows on campus didn’t open, for safety reasons or something. So I thought I’d use one of the big elm trees on campus.” He pauses as the waitress shows up with our food.
“So, anyway, I managed to climb up and get my whole system going without issue. It worked perfectly, better than I could’ve imagined. Then, it’s time to climb down, and I can’t. I’m not sure what happened, but I couldn’t find any of the footholds I’d used to get up. No matter what way I moved, I couldn’t get myself down.”
“Let me guess, you called Matthias, and he came to your rescue?” I can see it. Matthias has been my knight in shiningarmor so many times. Only makes sense that he’s been practicing for years.
“No, that would’ve been way too reasonable. I sat there feeling sorry for myself for hours. I was at my breaking point when it got dark, still trying to work out my own solution, when Matthias showed up.” He takes a few bites of his meatloaf, humming his approval. “When I missed our usual meet-up, he got worried and came looking for me. It’s a big campus, but he knew my usual areas, saw my pulley system hanging down from the tree, and figured out what happened. It took some work, but he was able to get some additional people and help me work my way down from the tree.”
“I bet you were thrilled.” More reasons to avoid being outdoorsy.
“Embarrassed is more like it. Even more so when Matthias took me back to his room and lectured me for over an hour about how I should’ve called someone and that no matter how stupid it is, the most important thing is that I’m safe.” Of all Matthias’s friends, I think Aaron’s my favorite. He gets me and my constant embarrassment in a way I’m not sure the others can.
“That sounds like the same talk I’m going to get.” So far, I’ve managed to avoid breaking any of the rules he’s set for me. It hasn’t been that difficult. Doing homework is easy when he sits close to me. Staying hydrated and eating enough is simple when he provides both the food and water.
“Probably about right. Though yours will probably include more cuddles and kissing than mine did.”
My face flushes because Aaron knows that, even if it is probably obvious.
“Eat up.” He motions to my plate. “But not too fast. When we’re done, I’ll take you to Matthias’s house.”
“Oh, I’m not going there tonight.” I thought I’d said that already. “I’m going to go home since he’s working.”
“Yeah, I texted Matthias. He’ll be waiting for you.” Aaron smirks.
Shit. Maybe Aaron isn’t my favorite.
MATTHIAS
“Are you okay?” I pull Frank into my arms as soon as he steps onto the porch. He wraps himself around me, not answering the question. At least he looks physically alright. I wave at Aaron as he pulls away. I’m so thankful that he found Frank today. More thankful right now that he knows I need some time alone with him. “Come on, Firecracker. Let’s get inside where it’s warm.”
I pull him into the house, steering us toward the living room. I’ve got the fire going for warmth and some snacks and drinks on the coffee table. Even though I know Aaron fed him, I worry. Plus, it’s hard to know if there was enough for him to eat wherever they went. Finding food out is hard, and Frank wouldn’t say a word if the menu didn’t meet his needs.
“Now, tell me what happened,” I say, pulling him into my lap. I keep my voice soft. Aaron didn’t say much over text message, only that he had car trouble.
“My car battery’s dead. Again.” The dejected tone in his voice pulls at my heartstrings. “I swear I didn’t leave the light on. I don’t know what happened.”
“There’s a lot of things that could be wrong with it.” It’s an old car and might simply need a new battery. I don’t say that right now since it won’t solveanything. “These things happen sometimes, even if you do everything right.” I rub my hand over his back as he buries his face into my chest. I can feel the stress coursing through him, unable to relax even now that he’s back. “Why didn’t you call me?”
“You were in meetings.”
“None of which are as important to me as you are.” I hide my surprise at the words that came out of my mouth. People have always been the most important to me. Ask my friends, and they all know I would drop work for them in a heartbeat, no questions asked, no second thoughts. In fact, at some point over the years, I’ve done exactly that for all of them.
I don’t think my past partners would say the same. They always claimed that work was the most important thing in my life. I didn’t argue with them either. Probably because they weren’t entirely wrong.
