“A whole bunch of things.” I sigh.
“Give me the top ones on your list then.”
“Your parents are going to think that I’m in this relationship for your money, or that I’m too young for you, or too stupid for you, or not high enough society or…” Matthias puts his finger up against my mouth. Those are all valid concerns. Especially now that I agreed to let Matthias pay my spring tuition. I didn’t want to say yes, but honestly, I didn’t have a lot of choices. I did, however, make him let me draw up a contract where I’ll pay him back. He won the part where payments don’t start until after graduation. That’s a long time from now. It’s weird to think where we’ll be by then. And that Matthias honestly believes we’ll still be together.
It’s not like my tuition isthatexpensive. To him, it’s probably nothing. To me, it’s the difference between eating or not.
“That’s a lot of things.” He hums as he holds me close to him. “I can’t tell you not to worry, but I can assure you that they won’t think any of those things. My parents are far from perfect, but they’re very reasonable people. They’re going to adore you.”
“But—”
“And even if they don’t, it doesn’t change anything here. I’m an adult, and my parents don’t get a say in who I do or don’t date.”
“That all sounds so… reasonable.” It’s tough to imagine what that looks like. Matthias talks about his parents frequently, and I’ve heard him on the phone with them. They always seem warm and supportive, but in my experience, that doesn’t always mean anything. How people behave in private can be very different.
“I’m going to be right next to you all day. If you get uncomfortable or worried about anything, all you have to do is let me know. You still have your safeword, and we can step away for a few minutes so we can regroup or talk.”
I know Matthias means it, but I don’t want to take him away from time with his family. Especially not on Christmas.
“Now, before we get ready, what about we open a few presents?”
I nod enthusiastically. I spent a long time coming up with something that would be good enough. Given my limited funds, it was a real challenge to think of something that would adequately show him what he means to me. Plus, I know he got me something, and I didn’t want the differences in our financial status to be on full display for the day—especially knowing his parents would ask about it.
“Grab them for me?”
I hop off Matthias’s lap and grab the two wrapped packages from under the tree. The one I got for him is a small box wrapped in blue and silver paper covered in snowmen. The one for me is in glittery red with a big gold bow on top. It took me more time than I’m willing to admit to wrap his. I’m more of a gift bag person, but I wanted this to look extra nice. After he went to all the trouble of letting me help decorate the house, including me in all his customs, and bringing me home to his family.
“Open yours first.” I thrust the snowman-adorned box toward his chest and take up my spot next to him on the sofa.
“You really didn’t have to get me anything.”
“I did.”
He nods at me. I can tell he doesn’t agree, but he’s conceding the point. He opens the paper carefully, tearing the edges and undoing the careful folds in the paper. Of course, all it reveals is a brown box. I found it among my mother’s stuff to help put the package together since the gift didn’t come with any packaging.
When he pulls the top off the box, I hold my breath. It’s a bit of a gamble, but I hope it pays off.
“Frank, this is incredible.” He holds up the black and tan abacus I found at an antique market. I don’t know all the details about it, but the person told me their grandfather used it in his accounting practice.
“You mentioned that one of your colleagues had one on their desk a while ago.” I got lucky with that find. It put me a bit over budget for the holiday, but once I saw it, I knew it was the right choice.
“It’s perfect.” He moves the bead on one of the rows back and forth a few times. I may have played with a few times before I got it wrapped, and they’re heavier than I expected. It gives it that expensive feeling, even if I think a newer version might be lighter because it’s made from better materials. When he seems content, he sets it carefully down on the coffee table. “Thank you, really. This will go right on the bookshelf behind my desk the next time I’m in the office.”
I can’t help beaming.
“Now it’s your turn.”
I turn the package over in my hands a few times, trying to guess what it might be. Nothing pops to mind, though. After watching Matthias gingerly open his, I do my best not to rip into it like a wild animal.
I’m not successful. By the time I have the paper off, it’s in a pile on the floor. I’d bemore upset about it if I didn’t recognize the logo on the box. “I can’t accept this.” A tablet? Seriously?
“Why not? You need something to help with school, and this is a great way to give you a place where you can more easily take notes in math class, organize and do your reading, plus carry your schoolwork around more easily.” My laptop is old and heavy, making it a pain to cart around in my backpack. That doesn’t mean I need something like this.
“It’s too much.” This isn’t the base model either. This thing has all the bells and whistles that no one ever needs. Yes, it would be a big help for studying. Especially in math class when I struggle with putting my handwritten notes together with the slides from the professor.
“It’s not. You work hard in school, and this will make it a little easier. Please accept the gift. I want you to have it.”
I stare at him, unsure of what to say. It’s a big gift, but I also know the cost is a drop in the bucket for Matthias, a fact I’m still getting used to.
