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Kota put a calm hand on his arm. “Alright, we’ll figure this out, but we can’t do it tonight.”
“There’s nothing to figure out,” I said. “You can’t do anything about dreams.” Suddenly I was desperate for an earthquake or for someone to interrupt. I wanted them to forget about all this. It really didn’t matter to me right now about nightmares. They didn’t mean anything to me. My eyes fell on North’s arms and the blood drying in spots against his forearms. I leaned forward, taking his arm gently. “Oh, North. It is bad.”
North drew his arm away from me. “I’ll live.”
I frowned. “We should clean you up.”
“I agree,” Kota said. “Sang, find the medical kit, okay? I’m going to go calm the others downstairs and we’ll all try to get some sleep. It’s late. We’ll talk in the morning.” He slid his glasses up with a forefinger before turning away, unlocking the door and marching out.
I jumped off of the counter and dug in the drawers for his medical kit.
“I don’t need a bandage,” North said. “Just let me wash.” He nudged me away from searching and made me stand behind him as he turned on the sink and started rubbing his arms under the water. The wounds opened again. Blood dripped into the sink.
“North,” I whispered. I ripped tissues from the box on the counter and collected one of his arms, pulling it close. I applied pressure against the marks. “I’ll sleep on my hands from now on,” I promised. “Maybe I shouldn’t have done this at all. I should have known better--”
North lifted his other hand out of the water. He pushed two fingers to my lips, drawing my mouth closed. “Stop talking like that.”
“But...” I mumbled through his fingers.
“What do you want?” he asked. “Is being locked up by your parents the life you really want? Do you want to leave us?”
My eyes widened. My head started shaking. No! I didn’t want to leave them at all. They were all I ever had.
He slipped his fingers away from my mouth. “This is what we are, Sang Baby. You’re one of us now. Your problems are our problems. Running away from us isn’t going to help. So stop it.” He smirked. “Besides, I’m bigger than you. I’ll sit on you if I have to.”
I closed my eyes, cracking a smile. “North...” I didn’t want to laugh. I didn’t want to go back to crying either. I didn’t know what I wanted. Maybe I did and I was lying to myself. I wanted to feel that connection he did. I wanted to understand.
He took the tissues from my hands. “I think I’ve stopped bleeding,” he said. He tossed the tissues into the trash and clasped his hand around mine. “Let’s go.”
Friends hold hands. Friends help each other. Friends were there for you when you had nightmares at a sleepover.
It was a lot to get used to.
Downstairs, the lights were off. North held my hand to guide me back to the makeshift bed. I couldn’t see in the dark, but I sensed something wrong. The room felt empty. When my eyes adjusted enough, I realized Nathan, Luke and Gabriel weren’t in the room. North ignored this, dragging me down into my spot and commanding I go to sleep.
I wondered if Nathan was keeping his promise to look in on my mother that night. I wondered if Luke and Gabriel went with him. If so, what was taking so long?
Or was the Academy demanding their attention?
IN It Together
Cracks of light seeped between my eyelids. My cheek pressed against Silas’s bicep.
My eyelashes flickered over his skin each time I would partially open my eyes. His face was close enough to the back of my head that his breath swept at my hair. I was lying on my side facing North, who had both of my hands wrapped up in his as he slept. They were both so close I didn’t need the blankets to keep warm. I was so cozy and comfortable. I kept drifting in and out of sleep.
“It’s time guys.” Kota’s voice drifted softly to us that for a moment I wondered if I had dreamt it.
Silas stirred. He leaned over me and I felt his lips at my ear. “Aggele mou,” he whispered. “I need my arm back.”
I groaned, lifting my head up so he could slide away from me.
When he pulled away, he rolled over and I sensed him sitting up.
North grunted something and released my hands. He stuffed his arms around my waist and drew me close to him, pulling me underneath his blanket. His hand went to the back of my head to press my face against his chest and he yanked the blanket over our heads. His mouth, chin and nose dropped against the top of my head. The gruff feeling of unshaven face scratched at my scalp. His leg hooked over both of mine.
He fell still. I snuggled against him, drifting back to sleep. Why didn’t it bug me that he was holding me so close? Maybe if I had been more awake I would have been flipping out that he was doing this but for the moment, I was too sleepy and comfortable to care.
“North,” Silas said above us.
“Go away.” North grunted. His fingers gripped at my back against my rib cage to draw me in tighter.
“If Erica comes out here and sees you like that, she’ll never let us do this again.”
North mumbled something that even I couldn’t understand.
“We’ve got to go,” Silas said.
“Where are you guys going?” I whispered to North.
He sighed heavily and spoke against my head. “Nowhere, Sang baby. Go back to sleep.” He grunted again and put me down in his spot, slipping away out onto the floor to stand up.
I wanted to wake up more. I wanted to ask where they were going. It should have bothered me. I pressed my cheek to his pillow, smelling the musk. I felt his warmth still around me and the blanket blocked out the light. As much as I willed myself to sit up and ask the questions, sleep dragged me down again.
When I woke again, it was Erica hovering over me, shaking my arm. “Sang? Do you want to get up?”
I sat up quickly, shoving the blanket away and dragged a palm over my eyes to rub away the sleep. Through squinting eyes, I gazed over at the others.
All of the makeshift beds were empty.
Erica smiled. She dressed in black yoga pants and an oversized gray t-shirt with USMC scrawled in yellow block lettering across the front. “I recommend if you want a shower, you should do it now.”
“Where are they?” I asked.
“Outside,” she said. She pressed a hand to my knee. I willed myself not to flinch at her touch. Somehow the sensation was stronger to pull away when she did that compared to the boys’ touches. I wasn’t sure why. “Come see.” She nodded her head toward the far window.
I crawled out of North’s spot and wobbled on my feet behind Erica, following her to the dining room. She stopped at the window where the simple white blinds were closed. She threaded her fingers between two blind slats and separated them with her fingers, peeking out into the yard. She stepped back, motioning with her free hand in the direction of the open space to indicate I should look.
Dawn light blinded me for a moment. I blinked back against it. Familiar voices were shouting and it was enough to wake me fully. I focused.
All seven of the boys were outside. They were lined up, side by side, faces firm, eyes set. They were doing push-ups in the grass. Each one had matching, fitted gray shirts and sweatpants. They were barefoot. As they moved, they counted off together. I could hear Silas’s booming voice and Victor’s baritone and the others chorused. Kota’s glasses had fogged. They were all sweating, their hair soaked. Gabriel’s arms shook but he kept up with all of them.
After a few minutes, they jumped up together and started doing jumping jacks, starting together in eerie unison.
My heart tightened in my chest. My brain couldn’t piece together this puzzle. “What are they doing?” I whispered.
“From what I understand,” Erica said, her head moving next to mine to gaze out at the boys, “this is a punishment of some sort.”
“Punishment?”
“When they’ve been misbehaving too much. I probably shouldn’t say punishment. It?
?s more like a reminder.” Erica sighed, a haunted smile tucked into the corner of her mouth. “My son has been enrolled in the Academy since he was little. When he was twelve, they sent him, everyone, to something like a boot camp for eight weeks.” She paused as there was another change in the boys’ routine. They fell to the ground to do sit ups. “When he got back, he had changed so much. I didn’t really recognize him. He was stronger, faster. He started giving orders like a sergeant. Now whenever they’re together, if there’s a scuffle, the next morning they’re out there.”
“How long will they keep going?”
She shrugged. “An hour. Maybe two. It depends on Kota.”
That’s what it was yesterday. One hour meant working out together that long. “He tells them to? And he does it too? They do it all together?”
“All in,” she said. “If they do it, he does it. They’re a team. I don’t understand it, really, but they’ve formed this brotherhood. I used to worry about this. I wondered why a twelve-year-old boy was working so hard and how could he order kids, sometimes twice his size, around like that. Instead, ever since then they’ve worked together, they’ve played together. They became each others’ world.” She laughed softly. “To be honest, I never thought they’d talk to anyone else,” she said. She faced me. Her green eyes lit up, familiar like Kota’s. “I thought it was those boys for life.”
I wanted to share her curious looks. I couldn’t get over how this was my fault. I knew it. I stirred them up. Kota said I was giving them something to fight over. “Is it bad that...”
She turned on me, grabbing my hands and looking me in the eye. “Sang,” she said. “You’re a bright little girl and for some reason, whatever reason, they’ve picked you to join them. To be honest, I’m rather jealous.”
