She bends toward me. “Have you lost it? You could sit there and stare at his face for two hours. Twice! No way am I going to let you sit in the back and play third wheel.”
I know the loss. I have taken a strong liking to that face. “You ride shotgun both ways or you can’t come.”
She stares at me, incredulous, but doesn’t press. “You’re insane.”
I nod, oddly comforted. She says it like a sad fact, not to taunt or tease. I’m so tired of pretending to be normal, so her directness is a balm, removing the need for my cracking facade.
She waves her hand. “Fine, but you’re breaking it to Mr. Dreamboat. He’ll think I’m trying to steal him from you or something. Acca-awkward.”
I desperately hope she never tries. She’s beautiful. And functional.
I pinch the bridge of my nose and consider the real hurdle. How do I explain to Levi why I never sit in a guy’s front seat? Everything is so complicated and I’m exhausted. My head closes in on itself just imagining telling him the whole truth. It would be so much worse than with Tess?—
I shake my head. No crying right now. Squash it down.
“I’ll tell him,” I finally concede. “He says he expects a road tripplaylist for the ages.”
“Ooh, yes. It’s gonna be stellar. Just wait.”
I’m sure it will be … if she remembers to book her flights.
She spins away, humming.
I chuckle at her version of “Come Fly with Me.” Sophie has a knack for pulling me out of my Eeyore moods. Always by accident, but I’ll take it.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
Please,no nightmares tonight.
I brush my teeth again, stalling. Maybe there’s mouthwash. I fish under the sink. There. My teeth are spotless now. What’s next? Clipping my nails? I close the drawer with a sigh. Enough. Wash my face, go to bed, and deal with it. If the nightmares come, they come. It’s nothing I haven’t endured before.
I hear Mia stride into the suite as I turn on the faucet. Her determined steps are a dead giveaway.
“Mira, we need to talk.“ From behind, her resolute gaze catches mine in the mirror.
Uhh. I pat my face dry with a towel and twist around. “Sure … what’s up?”
“You’ve been doing this thing that drives me nuts. I’ve been thinking, and it’s sort of like an inferiority complex? It doesn’t make any sense to me because you have a good head on your shoulders.” She motions along as if it will help me interpret. “Imean, I know it’s not a ‘You Don’t Know You’re Beautiful’ kind of problem.” She drops her hands. “What’s happening to me? Sophie has me talking in song titles. Anyway, you’re one of the few girls I know who isn’t insecure about how you look or who you are, which is just mature and awesome of you.”
Okay, that’s really nice, but this is clearly the sandwich method.
“So what’s with all the deferring?” She lifts her hands. “You’re all ‘No, you pick the movie. No, you tell your story. No, you first in line. No, you choose the plan.’ You do know nice and kind aren’t the same thing, right? You let Sophie walk all over you. You won’t take up space. And, obviously, the whole general Levi thing.”
Get me the condiments. It’s the sandwich method all right. “Whole general Levi thing?” I ask, and immediately regret my active listening.
“That guy is falling for you, and I know you’re here for it. You wanted him day one, but you’re still holding him off like the Secret Service. If you have a reason, I would get that, more than most, but I have a bad feeling you’re deferring again.Qué te pasa? Are you assuming he’s gonna move on? Are you letting some other girl snatch him up? Luckily, he’s picked exactly one to take a liking to, so that doesn’t seem like a huge risk, but seriously, Kit, cut it out!”
When will she quit yelling at me? I’m paralyzed with the towel in my hand. I must have stepped back, because my spine is flush against the countertop.
“Am I making you mad? I’m not trying to make you mad. I just want you to think clearly. I want all the good things for you.”
What is this? What do I even say?
Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.
Tenderhearted. Okay.
“Mia, I’m trying to listen. This is a lot.”
