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My hand is getting sweaty. I feel an intense urge to let go of Adam’s hand to wipe the sweat on my hip, but I don’t. Being uncomfortable is part of being on a date, right? Like holding in your farts when you’re in a new relationship. It’s a necessary evil. Suddenly, I think of the first time I farted in front of Chris and I can’t help but smile.
“Why are you so happy?” Adam asks as we trudge across the sand toward the bleachers.
“I’m thinking of how sweaty my hand feels right now.”
He grips my hand tighter. “Too bad. I’m not letting go.”
“I’ll never let go, Jack,” I whisper dramatically, and he shakes his head.
“You jump, I jump,” he replies, and I laugh.
“You love Titanic,” I tease him. “You know, that first day I saw you in the café, I kept calling you Jack Dawson in my head.”
“Do I look that old to you?”
“No, and you’re much better looking than him, anyway.”
“You’d better watch out, Claire,” he says as we climb the steel steps up to the bleachers. “If you keep saying stuff like that I’m going to be forced to take you into the water for a swimming lesson.”
“I know what that means and I would never. There are a million people out here.”
We sit at the end of a bench a few rows down from the top and the steel bench is hot against the backs of my legs.
He finally lets go of my hand and leans over to whisper in my ear. “I thought you liked taking risks.”
His lips linger against my ear and his breath sends a tingling sensation racing through me. I swallow hard as I shift in my seat and he finally pulls away.
“The first group hits the water in a few minutes,” he says, as if I care. “So we have some time to finish our little game of questions. But this time we have to actually answer. No answering a question with a question.” He grabs my hand again before he begins. “What’s your favorite time of day?”
I pause for a minute to think, though I already know the answer. “That time of day when the sun hasn’t come up yet, but you can already feel it coming. It’s an elusive warmth, like a subtle promise whispered in your ear and you can go on with your day knowing you’ve been given another chance to get it right. Sometimes I get up early just so I can sit outside with a cup of tea and feel it.”
I turn to Adam and his face is serious. “I know it’s a total cliché, but my favorite time of day is sunset.” He takes a deep breath then turns his gaze to the water. “We used to live near Carolina Beach and my dad would take me out every day after school to surf until the sun went down. It’s bittersweet because the sunset always made me a little sad knowing that it was the signal for us to leave—and I never wanted to leave the water. But it also brings back some really good feelings about that time in my life, you know, before things got complicated.”
There’s so much I want to ask him now, but I have to pick just one question.
“Okay, why do you still work for your dad if you hate it? And don’t give me the obvious answer of family obligation because you don’t strike me as the kind of guy who would let that stop him from doing anything.”
He leans forward, resting his elbows on the tops of his legs and I’m forced to lean forward with him since he’s still gripping my hand like a life raft.
He encapsulates my hand in both of his and my hand disappears. “I guess we both have some questions we’re not ready to answer.”
I wait a moment before I nudge his shoulder for him to look up. “Hey, the first group just paddled out.”
During the entire first round, and half the second round, Adam explains the rules of the tournament and what each surfer needs to score to move on. Every time one of them executes a difficult trick without bailing he gets so excited and cheers with the crowd. His enthusiasm is infectious and before long, I find myself cheering so loudly my throat aches by the end of the second round. I haven’t had this much fun on a date since… well, I don’t know if I’ve ever had this much fun on a date.
As we’re sitting there waiting for the third round to begin, a group of guys in board shorts with beads of water and sand sparkling on their shirtless chests pass us on the way up to the next row of bleachers. A couple of them ogle me as they pass and Adam’s grip tightens on my hand. I look at him and the tiny muscle in his jaw is twitching.
“Come on. Let’s go down and watch some of the bands while we wait for the next round.”
I allow him to pull me along down the bleachers to the sand and toward the stage before I say anything. “What was that about?”
“What?”
“That?” I say, nodding toward the bleachers behind us. “You’re not upset about those guys checking me out, are you?”
He grits his teeth again as he lets out a breath through his nostrils. “I don’t like…. Wait, let me rephrase that. I sometimes have a problem controlling my temper. That’s part of the reason I moved here. I’ve learned that the only way for me to deal with it is to avoid situations that set me off.”
Great. I had to find the one sweet guy in Wrightsville Beach with anger issues. I realize quite abruptly that we’ve both let go of each other’s hands as we approach the crowd huddled around the stage where a DJ is now playing electronic dance music. Some people jump up and down to the beat while others writhe against each other. Some hold cans of soda in their hands, which, by the enthusiasm of their thrusts, are probably filled with more than carbonated water and high-fructose corn syrup.
The smell of a dozen different sunscreens, coconut, pineapple, jasmine, combined with the scent of hot, sweaty bodies grinding against each other is intoxicating. I follow Adam as he moves through the crowd, parting the swaying sea of bodies for me. He makes it as close as a few rows of bodies from the stage before he turns around, wraps his arms around my waist, and lifts me up.
I try not to giggle as I get a swooping sensation in my belly. I can feel my dress riding up my back, exposing my bikini bottoms to everyone. I wrap my arms around his neck as he leans his forehead against mine.
“Claire,” he says, just loud enough so I can hear him over the music. “I’m going to kiss you.”
His breath is hot against my mouth as he slowly moves in, stopping just before our lips touch and my whole body aches for this kiss. He smiles and I pull him toward me, but he turns his head at the last second and my lips brush his cheek.
“But not here,” he says into my ear, and I’m furious with frustration.
“Put me down.”
He plants a soft kiss on my cheekbone then laughs when I wipe it away. He finally sets me down on the sand, but he holds onto my wais
t so I can’t turn away.
“Don’t be mad,” he yells over the music. “I just want it to be perfect, like you.”
I roll my eyes. “Boy, you’ve got a rude awakening coming if you think I’m perfect.”
“You’re perfect,” he insists as he grabs my face and forces me to look him in the eye. “Just the right amount of flaws.”
Our chests heave against each other and I can’t take it anymore. “I want to go home.”
“So soon?”
“You didn’t let me finish,” I say, making no attempt to keep myself from staring at his gorgeous lips. “I want to go home… with you.”
Chapter Nine
Relentless Desire
We half-run and half-walk back to his apartment. The entire time I’m trying to mentally shutdown all the alarm bells going off inside my brain. This guy is trouble. He pursues me to the point that I’m begging him to go to bed with him. Plus, he’s admitted to having rage issues. This is wrong, wrong, wrong.
So why does it feel so damn right.
As soon as he closes his front door, he clasps his hand around the back of my neck, ensnaring a handful of my hair, and pulls my face toward him. His first kiss is soft as he presses his lips to the corner of my mouth. He kisses the other corner and a sigh builds inside my chest. His tongue parts my lips and I whimper as my body melts into him, too weak to fight it.
As if he could sense this, he scoops me up in his arms and carries me to his bedroom. He lays me down on the bed and his gaze slides over me as if I’m a meal he’s preparing to devour and he can’t decide where to start.
He reaches behind his back and turns on an oscillating fan without breaking eye contact with me. “It’s very hot in here.”
He pulls off his tank top and lies on top of me, supporting his weight on his hands as he softly kisses my forehead. “I want to make love to you,” he whispers as his lips brush my temple and leave a burning trail down the side of my face before he reaches my ear. “I want to leave you dazed and confused for a week with nothing but my name on your lips.”
I’m fading fast. One part of me wants him to keep going, but another voice inside me keeps screaming that this is wrong. I’m falling too fast. It’s going to happen again.
I need to quiet that voice.
I clutch his hair and pull his face away from my neck. “Tell me a joke. Quick.” He smiles as he leans down to kiss me and, as his tongue slides over mine, a clash of emotions threatens to rip me in half. “Please,” I beg, and he groans into my mouth.
“Claire, didn’t anyone ever warn you to never trust an atom?” He kisses the corner of my mouth so softly it sends a gust of longing sweeping through me. “They make everything up.”
His fingers skim the side of my thigh as they travel upward, snagging the hem of my dress and exposing my skin to the cool air of the fan.
My breath hitches as his fingers toy with the edge of my bikini bottoms. “Adam, did anyone ever tell you your jokes are bad and you should feel bad?”
“Never,” he whispers as he presses his lips against the swell of my breast.
His hand slides between my thighs and I gasp as he strokes me through the fabric of my bikini.
“Is this your subtle way of telling me I shouldn’t trust you?” I say, eager to fill my brain with any thought other than the voice that keeps telling me to stop.
His hand slides up to my belly then beneath the waistband of my bikini bottoms. My whole body goes rigid.
“Is this okay?” he asks, looking into my eyes as his fingers come to rest on my swollen flesh.
I want to tell him it is more than okay. I desperately want him to keep going. I want to feel him inside me. I want to release all this tension we’ve built up on the beach and over the past week. But I keep thinking about the day my life changed one year ago and the events—and mistakes—that led to that day. And the countless lies I’ve told since then.
I push him off me and sit up on the bed. “I can’t. I’m sorry.”
I bury my face in my knees and he lets out a frustrated sigh as he sits up next to me. “Hey,” he murmurs as he lifts my chin. “I’m not irritated with you,
