Suddenly needling her was no longer amusing.
“No. I never had any claim on you, did I?” I said tonelessly.
“I didn’t mean to imply—”
“What? That I am nothing more to you than any other man you fell into bed with? Out of boredom? Or curiosity?”
I knew I shouldn’t have said those things, had no right to. Yet the mere thought of her moving on, finding happiness with another, was unbearable. Maker, Aramaz was right. My heart was too lost in darkness to ever comprehend how to love someone.
Rada’s grip on my waist tightened, her voice shaking as she murmured, “Don’t be ridiculous, Belekoroz. What you are to me… There is no word in the tongues of mortals or immortals to describe what is between us.”
She couldn’t give me such an opening and expect me not to pounce on it. “What Iamto you? Not what I was?”
An annoyed puff of breath warmed my back even through the wool of my tunic. “Was.”
I yelped as a sharp pain shot through my thigh next. “Did you just pinch me?”
“You deserved it.” No remorse in her retort. “Always playing your bloody games with me.”
“Iam playing games? It seems to me you quite cleverly outmaneuvered me, ensuring I would agree to help your little band of peasants,” I said, arching an eyebrow at her over my shoulder.
She scowled at me. Time to shift the conversation.
“How did Kyree find out you possess alyr-stone?” I asked, my gaze returning to the road.
Rada sighed. “I used it to heal him when his wing was damaged.”
“By dragon fire?”
“Correct.” She shifted again behind me, clearly massaging her temple. “Maker, he’ll never forgive me if he discovers our true identities. He has little respect for the Ten, and even less for the Anima, and he…”
“Hates me?” I could imagine. “He suspects something, though. About who you really are.”
“Yes, but his suspicions might have led him to an incorrect assumption about you. And today, you may have unintentionally reinforced that belief.”
Reflecting on Kyree’s enigmatic comments and Rada’s words, I realized she was right. “He thinks I’m one of your Anima.”
“It would explain your—by the way, completely exaggerated—protectiveness toward me.”
I scanned the hills on either side of the road. No sign of danger, but we still should not linger too long in one place. It was bad enough that we were returning to the farm. I spurred Nacin on, causing Rada to tighten her hold on me with a gasp.
“I once swore an oath of fealty to you, my queen,” I reminded her when she had settled into the faster pace. “And I take my oaths seriously.”
“Really?” she asked skeptically. “So you would obey all my orders?”
“Do you wish to command me, Baradaz?”
She scoffed. “I’ll refrain. We both know you’d just twist my words to your advantage.”
Now, that was an unfair amount of suspicion. “I am a bit heartbroken, you know. I expected you to mourn my memory for at least a decade or two,” I said in a pained tone. She stiffened against me. “After all, I was the best you ever had, and—”
My insolence earned me another pinch, yet I could also feel her body shake against mine. “This is not funny,” she pressed out, torn between amusement and irritation.
“You’re laughing; you can’t deny it.” My voice turned smug. “Besides, that you only invited Farm Boy into your bed one single time and never again is quite telling.”
She hit my shoulder. “I didn’t want to hurt his feelings.”
“Fine. I promise I will let the topic rest forever.” I paused. “Just admit it was abysmal.”
