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Sam smiles and scratches his head. “Get out of here,” he says.
Henri shrugs. “That’s what I’ve heard. ”
“All right,” Sam says, more than willing to oblige Henri. “Well, did you know that the dinosaurs really didn’t go extinct? Aliens were so fascinated by them that they decided to gather them all up and take them to their own planet. ”
Henri shakes his head. “I didn’t know that,” he says. “Did you know that the Loch Ness monster was really an animal from the planet Trafalgra? They brought him here as an experiment, to see if he could survive, and he did. But when he was discovered the aliens had to take him back, which is why he was never spotted again. ”
I laugh, not at the theory, but at the name Trafalgra. There is no planet named Trafalgra and I wonder if Henri has made it up on the fly.
“Did you know the Egyptian pyramids were built by aliens?”
“I’ve heard that,” Henri says, smiling. This is funny to him because though the pyramids weren’t actually built by aliens, they were built using Lorien knowledge and with Lorien help. “Did you know the world is supposed to end on December 21, 2012?”
Sam nods and grins. “Yeah, I’ve heard that. Earth’s supposed expiration date, the end of the Mayan calendar. ”
“Expiration date?” I chime in. “Like, a ‘best if used before’ date that’s printed on milk cartons? Is Earth going to curdle?”
I laugh at my own joke, but Sam and Henri pay me no attention.
Then Sam says, “Did you know crop circles were originally used as a navigational tool for the Agharian alien race? But that was thousands of years ago. Today they are only created by bored farmers. ”
I laugh again. I have the urge to ask what sorts of people create alien conspiracies if it is bored farmers who create crop circles, but I don’t.
“How about the Centuri?” asks Henri. “Do you know of them?”
Sam shakes his head.
“They’re a race of aliens living at Earth’s core. They are a contentious race, in constant discord with one another, and when they have civil wars Earth’s surface is thrown off-kilter. That’s when things such as earthquakes and volcanic eruptions occur. The tsunami of 2004? All because the Centuri king’s daughter went missing. ”
“Did they find her?” I ask.
Henri shakes his head, looks at me, then back at Sam, who is still smiling at the game. “They never did. Theorists believe she is able to shift her shape, and that she is living somewhere in South America. ”
Henri’s theory is so good, I think there’s no way he made it up that quickly. I stand there and actually ponder it, even though I’ve never heard of aliens called the Centuri, even when I know for a fact that nothing lives at Earth’s core.
“Did you know…” Sam pauses. I think Henri has stumped him, and as soon as that thought pops into my mind Sam says something so frightening that a wave of terror shoots through me.
“Did you know that the Mogadorians are on a quest for universal domination, and that they have already wiped out one planet and are planning to wipe Earth out next? They’re here seeking human weakness so that they can exploit us when the war begins. ”
My mouth drops open and Henri stares at Sam, dumbfounded. He’s holding his breath. His hand tightens around his coffee cup until I’m afraid that if it tightens any further the cup will crumple. Sam glances at Henri, then at me.
“You guys look like you’ve seen a ghost. Does this mean I win?”
“Where did you hear that?” I ask. Henri looks at me so fiercely that I wish I had remained silent.
“From They Walk Among Us. ”
Henri still can’t think of how to respond. He opens his mouth to speak but nothing comes. Then a petite woman standing behind Sam interrupts.
“Sam,” she says. He turns and looks at her. “Where have you been?”
Sam shrugs. “I was standing right here. ”
She sighs, then says to Henri, “Hi, I’m Sam’s mother. ”
“Henri,” he says, and shakes her hand. “Pleased to meet you. ”
She opens her eyes in surprise. Something in Henri’s accent has excited her.
“Ah bon! Vous parlez français? C’est super! J’ai personne avec qui je peux parler français depuis long-temps. ”
Henri smiles. “I’m sorry. I don’t actually speak French. I know my accent sounds like it, though. ”
“No?” She is disappointed. “Well hell, here I thought some dignity had finally come to town. ”
Sam looks at me and rolls his eyes.
“All right, Sam, let’s get going,” she says.
He shrugs. “You guys gonna go to the park and the hayride?”
I look at Henri, then at Sam. “Yeah, sure,” I say. “Are you?”
He shrugs.
“Well, try to come meet us if you can,” I say.
He smiles and nods. “Okay, cool. ”
“Time to go, Sam. And you might not be able to go on the hayride. I need your help at home,” his mother says. He starts to say something but she walks away. Sam follows her.
“Very nice woman,” Henri says sarcastically.
“How did you make all that up?” I ask.
The crowd begins migrating up Main Street, away from the circle. Henri and I follow it up to the park, where cider and food are being served.
“You lie long enough and you start to get used to it. ”
I nod. “So what do you think?”
He takes a deep breath and exhales. The temperature is cold enough so that I can see his breath. “I have no idea. I don’t know what to think at this point. He caught me off guard. ”
“He caught us both off guard. ”
