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I thought he would lean forward and steal a quick kiss, but he didn’t. He took my hand and led me across the back of the library. He looked in all directions before opening a door and pulling me into a storage room I didn’t know existed. He shut the door behind us and locked it from the inside. He put his hands around my waist and pulled me until our faces were almost touching. “Believe me, yet?”
“Nope. I need more proof,” I challenged.
“I was hoping you would say that.”
He placed sweet, soft kisses on my lips and I thought my legs would melt beneath me. He moved to my neck and I let him because I knew the door was locked. My breathing became ragged and his kisses became more urgent, then stopped suddenly when we heard someone jiggling the door knob from the other side. I began to giggle and he cupped his hand on my mouth and shushed me. “Do you want to get caught?” he whispered.
I felt a little rebellious streak run through me and I realized I didn’t care if we got caught because I was having too much fun.
“Come on, we better get out before whoever that was comes back with a key.”
He cracked the door and peeked out, making sure the coast was clear. When he was certain we wouldn’t be seen leaving, he opened the door and we sprinted toward our table. I giggled all the way back because I was high from the excitement of almost being caught.
Almost as soon as we sat down, Mrs. Tanner showed up at our table to check on our progress. “You two are quite a bit behind the others, so you need to pick up the pace.”
“Yes, ma’am,” we said in unison, then laughed at the irony of her words after she walked off. We were definitely picking up the pace, just not the way she wanted us to.
“Okay, we’re going to get a bad grade if we don’t get serious. Don’t make me regret allowing you to be my partner,” he said playfully.
“Allow me to be your partner? I can arrange for Brad to be your partner again. In fact, I bet I could find him right now and talk him into it.”
I stood up, pretending to walk away. He reached for my arm and gently pulled me onto his lap. “I have no doubt you could talk Brad into doing anything for you.”
I looked around, then gave him a quick kiss before leaving his lap and returning to my chair.
We got a little more serious about our work since we were behind and I realized something. Jessie was smart…like really smart. We didn’t have to look up a lot of the things listed in the lyrics because he already knew what they meant.
“How do know all this stuff? You’re like a walking, breathing search engine.”
“How do you not know this stuff? Every one of these things listed in the lyrics made headlines. Most of them were very heated and controversial.”
“Peyton Place? I’ve heard of that, but I’ve never known what it meant,” I admitted.
“It was a published novel about some people in a small town hiding their sordid secrets. It was made into a movie and a television series. As you imagine, a book that included incest, abortion, adultery, lust and murder was highly controversial during the 1950‘s.
Jessie continued to enlighten and amaze me with his knowledge of world events. Although it wasn’t intentional on his part, he made me look like anything but the top student in school.
We went to third period and sat in the same seats we had taken on the first day of school. I leaned forward and whispered, “Am I doing better?”
He turned his head and whispered over his shoulder, “On what?”
I leaned in closer to his ear. “You told me I should smile more. I’ve been working on it.”
“Yes and it suits you quite well I might add.” I smiled more because it was him that suited me well and I found myself wishing for a simpler life, one that could include him without causing a complete eruption of chaos.
“I’m not looking forward to next period,” he confessed and I heard the pain in his voice. What Payton said was true-he was falling for me. I needed to make a decision soon because what I was doing was wrong. I had no right to ask him to stand aside and watch me with my boyfriend while I made a decision to keep him or cut him lose.
Physics was cruel and I almost thought Gretchen knew she was pushing my come apart switch as she continuously touched Jessie while we practiced formulas. If it wasn’t his arm, it was his leg, or his back. Every time I saw her touch him, I felt myself slipping into her trap. I finally lost it when I heard her say, “Those jeans look really hot on you, but they’d look even hotter on my bedroom floor.”
I couldn’t take it anymore and I had a slip with my impulse control. “Gretchen, he doesn’t want to swap body fluids with you, so stop harassing him already.”
She grinned at me and said, “Well I could agree with you, but then we’d both be wrong,”
Forbes interjected himself into a conversation he clearly was not a part of. “Not this again, Claire. It’s none of your business what goes on between them.”
Gretchen smiled at me and I almost swear the gleam in her eye screamed that she had the 411 on me. I think she had figured me out and was taunting me because she knew she could while I was helplessly forced to take whatever she dished.
This couldn’t go on much longer. Could I muster the strength to go against every expectation people had in me? I resolved that I couldn’t drag this out much longer or it would drive me crazy. I would have to make a decision this weekend.
20 Is This the Beginning or the End?
Jessie
I was walking to the field and a thought crossed my mind. I would need to thank Gretchen later for that little stunt she pulled in Physics, even if it was for own pleasure. I had to hand it to her-she definitely had a gift for getting under Claire’s skin when it came to me. Although I had given up my raid on Forbes, I couldn’t help but love that he saw Claire’s possessiveness toward me when Gretchen invaded her territory.
I wasn’t looking forward to sitting on the bench in practice today, but I chose to follow doctor’s orders since the temporary loss of feeling in my arm about scared me senseless. I could never admit that fear to anyone except Claire.
I found myself voluntarily telling her things I wouldn’t utter to another person-things bearing my heart and soul. I unexpectedly liked the vulnerability of sharing small parts of myself with her because it was something I’d only experienced with Deandra.
I had been paired with Deandra as my counselor after my near death experience because of how I could possibly experience some post traumatic stress. In the beginning of our sessions, I was resolved to keeping my mouth shut, but then I figured out I wouldn’t be released from her care until I fessed up and told her what she wanted to know about me. I never imagined the freedom I would feel by telling someone, a stranger that wouldn’t judge me, about my past.
