"The side of true love, obviously," Henry replies with infuriating cheerfulness. "And statistical probability. Though I admit, the timeline was faster than any of us predicted."
My mother, having the time of her life, points directly at me with a finger that seems to vibrate with pure joy. "Madeline Rose, we are going to have a long talk about safe practices, about family planning, and about the proper time and place for creative collaborations!"
She turns her benevolent gaze back to Mason, who is still trying to locate his missing sock while maintaining some shred of dignity. "And I do have a board titled 'Barnyard Elegance Meets Legal Ambition.' I'll send it your way. Purely for inspiration."
Mason, somehow managing to sound both composed and on the edge, says, "I'd be honored to review it. Perhaps after coffee. And after I locate my sock?"
"Your sock is hanging from the bear's ear," Savvy helpfully points out, taking a photo with her phone despite my continued protests. "Very artistic placement. Symbolic."
"Symbolic of what?!" I demand.
"The shedding of inhibitions? The casting aside of professional boundaries? The?—”
"SAVVY."
Henry, meanwhile, has begun sketching in the margin of one of his mood boards. "You know, this whole scene has given me ideas for the festival layout. We could do a Romance in Rural Settings pavilion. Totally authentic, wildly … experiential."
"NO PAVILIONS BASED ON MY SEX LIFE!"
My mother gasps in mock horror. "Madeline! Language! And in front of your new boyfriend, too! Though I suppose he's heard worse from you by now." She winks at Mason, who is now laughing so hard he has to lean against the desk for support.
"This is not how an introduction is done," I say to Mason, who's wiping tears from his eyes.
"Seriously? Because this is exactly how I pictured it going," he replies, still grinning. "Maximum embarrassment, zero dignity, and your mother already planning our wedding. Efficient."
"Our WHAT now?"
Gloria claps her hands again. "Oh, I like him even more! He's practical! Do you know how hard it is to find a man who appreciates streamlined family dynamics?"
Savvy looks up from her phone, where she'd been typing furiously. "I've posted this to the festival's Instagram story. Don't worry, I kept it tasteful. The Ever After team working hard on innovative relationship-building strategies. Entirely professional. The engagement is through the roof."
"You did WHAT?"
"Relax, I cropped out the underwear. I'm not a monster."
Henry rolls his sleeve back to check his watch. "Well, this has been thoroughly entertaining, but we do have a festival to plan. Think you two can keep your hands off each other long enough to focus on community outreach? Or should we schedule around your brainstorming sessions?"
I slump forward with a groan. "I hate all of you. Every single one of you."
"No, you don't," my mother says cheerfully, scooping up the scattered donuts, moving like someone who's handled worse messes. "You love us, and we love you, and we love Mason because he makes you happy. Even if he does leave his unmentionables in inappropriate places."
"Those are boxer briefs," Mason says helpfully. "I'm particular about proper undergarment terminology."
"MASON."
"What? Your mother appreciates accuracy."
Gloria beams. "See? Attention to detail! That's the kind of quality that makes an excellent son-in-law."
And like that, the most intimate morning of my life turns into a full-blown family sitcom: spilled coffee, melting donuts, a bear rug that somehow looks smug, my best friend snapping photos, my business partner sketching wedding pavilions, and my overly-enthusiastic, wildly inappropriate mother grinning like it's the best day ever.
The one thing missing is a full brass band playing a tune and maybe a few tourists with cameras.
But somehow, even amidst the complete and utter madness, looking at Mason's shaking shoulders and Henry's amused smirk and Savvy's unrepentant grin and my mother's radiant face, I can't help but crack a smile.
This is my life now. Gloriously, magnificently, catastrophically messy.
And for the first time in a long time, that feels perfect.
