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“Ahh, okay.” Houdini looked over to Whiplash, busy looking at something on her phone, and then brought his eyes back to mine. “Everything good?”
I nodded. “Yeah. Sure. Why do you ask?”
Houdini’s eyes narrowed and he shrugged. “No reason, just checkin’ in.”
I fiddled with the brim of my hat, wishing I could tell him that the last thing I wanted was to go to this thing, walk the line alone, and then watch Solo from the other side of the room all night. But with Whiplash so close, I forced a smile and said, “I’m good. Just ready to get there and get this thing over with.”
Houdini reached over and clapped me on the shoulder, and Whiplash held her phone up and snapped a photo. “Oh, buddy. I have to say you two are looking seriously hot. I’m telling you, Panther, you might be arriving solo, but by the end of it, I bet you could have your pick of any of the single ladies there tonight.”
My stomach revolted at the inadvertent reference to who I wish I could be arriving with, and also the idea of leaving with anyone other than Solo. “I think I’ll pass. Especially with the old man there.”
“Oh, that’s right. What a drag,” she said, screwing her nose up. “Well, we better get going; we still have to pick up Alphabet.”
I nodded, and as she called up to the driver and the car started to pull away from the barracks, I looked out the window in time to see Solo standing by my door, alone and ever fading as the car pulled further away.
I had the insane urge to tell the driver to stop, so I could get out and go to him, but instead I shut my mouth and did what I knew had to be done, knowing this small distance, this separation, had nothing on what we were going to face the day after NAFTA was through.
36 Solo
IT FELT LIKE a gut punch watching Panther drive away. I watched the limo until it was out of sight, standing there all alone. All dressed up and somewhere awful to go.
“I don’t think I’ve seen an uglier mug in all my life,” Gucci called out as he walked down from his room at the far end of the building with a woman I’d never seen before on his arm. He looked sharp, as did his date, who wore a long gown of shimmering gold. When he stopped in front of me, he frowned. “Why do you look like you just lost your best friend? Hello, I’m right here.”
Because I think I did just lose him. And there’s nothing I can do about it.
But I couldn’t tell Gucci that, not right now. So I slapped a more pleasant expression on my face and fist-bumped like I didn’t have a care in the world. At least, until I saw the monstrosity that drove up in front of our building.
“What the fuck is that?” The long black stretch limo wasn’t the classy ride Panther had gotten into, it was—
“A Hummer limo. Nice, right?”
“Is that necessary? How many of us are there?”
“I think twelve? Wait, eleven, since you don’t have a date.” Gucci slapped me on the back and headed toward the limo. “Come on, Solo, let’s do this. I need a drink.”
Sighing, I twisted the hat in my hands and joined the rest of the group.
It was strange. I wasn’t a fucking wallflower. I thrived on the social scene, especially with a few drinks in my system, but as we drove off and I cradled an untouched rum and Coke, I felt more alone than ever. Even with the blaring music and dancing and animated conversation that I didn’t even bother to join.
Gucci must’ve noticed, because he sat beside me and reached for a bottle of liquor. “Let’s do a couple shots.”
“Nah, I’m not really feelin’ it.”
“Which is exactly why I need you to get liquored up. It’s not like you to sit all quiet in the corner.”
“Gooch, I don’t think it’s a good idea.”
He sighed and lowered the bottle between his thighs, his face growing serious. “Look, man, I get it. I know it sucks, but trust me, that’s why you need this. To get through tonight.”
I stared at my friend, who obviously saw right through me, and felt my eyes begin to sting.
Shit, what is going on with me? I scrubbed a hand over my face until the prickling behind my lids went away, and then I groaned and laid my head back against the seat.
“Yeah, you’re right. I think I do need that drink.”
Gucci gave me a sad smile and clapped his hand on my shoulder. Then he poured us both a couple of shots, which I chased down with my rum and Coke. I didn’t want to get sloppy, since we’d be watched closely tonight, but maybe this would at least take the edge off.
