“I remember Dinorah.” Dull grief filtered out into his expression. “I remember Berchem.”
Cracks fissured my heart as he unburdened himself, and tears wet my eyes. “I’m so?—”
“I haven’t been Berchem in…a long time. Even though his life flashed through my head, it felt more like a story I was being told than anything that happened to me. His life hasn’t been mine since Dis Pater appointed me Viduus. I can mourn what Berchem lost, but I’m not the same person I was then.”
“Yeah. No.” I fumbled for a response. “Who would be?”
Silver eyes gazed up at me softly. “I love you, Frankie.”
“I…” Buzzing filled my ears until I couldn’t hear what he said next. “You…?”
“I love you.” He stroked his fingers over my hip. “I wanted to tell you while I’m of sound mind, if not sound body, so you won’t doubt me later.”
“But…” I couldn’t breathe for the dig of his fingers into my skin. “How can you love what I am?”
“Easily.”
“What if it’s her?” A sob got trapped in my chest. “What if she is what you see in me?”
“Despite who it belonged to, despite how it was used, it’s only a bone, Frankie.”
The horrors of my origin filtered through my mind, unrelenting. “It’s notonlya bone.”
“Poor choice of words,” he soothed me. “I only meant that the person I am now, and the person you are now, are not Berchem or Dinorah. Their stories—their fates—aren’t ours.” He tucked me tighter against him. “You asked me to choose, and I choose you, Frankie. I will always choose you.”
“You chose another before me, and eternity is just getting started by my watch.”
“An eternity I intend to spend with you, by you, growing and changing with you. If we must evolve, then we’ll evolve together.Foreverwarps people, convinces them to break their promises. I trust you to hold me accountable, to anchor me in whatever comes next, and I want to do the same for you.”
Hot tears streamed down my cheeks. “You’re sure?”
“All this time I was searching for answers, I was looking for you.”
“I’ll forget Berchem soon.” I touched the tack in my arm. “Neither of us will remember him.”
He would slide into history, but Dinorah would live on for us, as Anunit’s daughter and as a part of me.
With Matty and Josie acting as our personal historians, protecting us from a past that would only bring us pain, we could learn to respect the boundaries of our minds. To keep Kierce, it was a small price.
“You’ll remember me, who I am with you, and nothing else matters.”
“Ankou told me this isn’t your original form.” I toyed with a button on his shirt. “Will you keep it?”
“Yes.” His lips pulled to one side, his hand flexing in front of him. “It feels like me.”
“I wouldn’t have cared either way, but I do have a tiny crush on this version of you.” As I wriggled lower, his arms encircled me, and I tucked my head under his chin. “I’m sorry I couldn’t free you.”
“The crypt was a humbling experience.” A wry laugh moved through him. “I’m sorry you had to see that.”
“I’m sorry you had to experience it.” I set my palm on his chest. “I got so fixated on wresting you from Dis Pater, I neglected to consider the ramifications of unblocking your mind after you’ve spent so long under his rule.” I stroked my thumb over his heart. “The crypt was my fault, and I apologize for it.”
“Dis Pater never would have given me unfettered access to my memories if you hadn’t forced his hand. Without those moments of clarity, you would have always wondered whether I loved you…or her.” He covered my hand with his. “It was worth it for me to give you the answer you deserve.”
“There’s an answer you deserve too.” I tipped my head back, putting us nose to nose. “I didn’t let myself think it. I didn’t let myselffeelit. I thought I could shove it down, push it back, but losing you again broke me. It was nothing like the first time Abaddon took you from me.” I shut my eyes. “I realized when I saw you in the cage?—”
“Naked.”
“Kierce.”Spluttering a watery laugh, I fought the burn in my cheeks. “I’m baring my soul here.”
