Her best friend’s face popped up after a few rings, still in pajamas, sipping coffee like a smug psychic.
“Damn,” Maya said immediately, squinting. “Are you alive?”
Blair adjusted the sheet over her chest. “I think so? But, like, what if I’m not?”
“You’re alive. Barely. But you look thoroughly wrecked. Short man finally found your clit or what?”
Ashar, from the kitchen: “Short?”
Blair whipped around. “You heard that?”
“I hear everything.” He raised an eyebrow. “Who’s short?”
Maya leaned into the screen. “Ohhh. Wait, that doesn’t sound like him. Girl, did you finally find a real man?”
Blair said, “Define man.”
Maya smiled, “Oh, you know, I always suspected you were also into women.”
“I am, but that’s not what I’m talking about. I think I had sex with a sex god.”
“Like, not a real human? Did you lose your mind last night?”
Blair whispered, “I lost it a long time ago. Maybe he’s a post-sex hallucination. Like, a literal afterglow.”
Ashar brought her a plate. “Do hallucinations bring breakfast?”
Maya shouted, “Keep him.”
Ashar smirked, “Until she’s satisfied.”
Maya questioned, “So if he has friends, like hot demon friends, do they need dates for Thanksgiving?”
Blair said, “Absolutely not. No demons at your mom’s dinner table.”
“You’re telling me you get summoned dick magic and I’m just supposed to eat dry turkey alone while my cousins ask why I’m still single?”
Ashar said from somewhere behind Blair, “Tell her it’s not dry if she knows what she’s doing.”
“I LIKE HIM.”
“I swear to Satan, Maya.”
She dropped her face into her hands and hung up.
She sat at the dining room table and poked at her French toast like it might explode.
Across from her, Ashar sat shirtless, drinking coffee like he belonged there. Like this was normal. Like he hadn’t rearranged her nervous system eight hours ago.
How dare he not be losing his mind, too?
“This doesn’t proveanything,” she mumbled.
He tilted his head. “Still convinced you imagined the levitating orgasm?”
“It could’ve been lucid dreaming. Or, like, my final synapses firing off in the afterlife.”
Ashar smirked. “I cooked you breakfast.”
