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Dana’s first inclination was to turn the invitation down and go home to throw another epic pity party, but that wasn’t healthy. She needed her friend’s advice and this seemed like a perfect opportunity. The shop had been unusually busy for the last few weeks with several conventions being held at the hotel. There’d been no time or privacy for anything other than casual chitchat and truthfully Dana had been too depressed to attempt it. So she forced a smile and said brightly, “That sounds great. How about the Mexican place next door? I could use a margarita. We can always call a taxi if we need to.”
“I was thinking exactly the same thing.” Zoe grinned at her and they quickly finished cleaning up, then locked the shop before walking the short distance to the popular oceanfront restaurant.
Within a few moments they were snacking on chips and salsa and enjoying a delicious, frosty drink that was going straight to Dana’s head. “This is exactly what I needed,” she sighed. After taking another sip, she added, “This has been the week from hell.”
Zoe eyed her carefully. “You’ve been avoiding talking about Ash since your dinner that night. I could tell that you were upset and I didn’t want to pry. Are you ready to talk about it now? Did it not go as you thought? I was so sure he was going to say he loved you.”
“Oh, he did,” Dana said glumly. “We both made a total disaster of it, but the end result was that we feel the same about each other. I had exactly a car ride home to bask in the moment, before he told me all about Fiona. I shouldn’t have forced the issue. If I hadn’t, then I might be happy instead of freaked out over being her clone.”
“Say what?” Zoe asked with her glass suspended halfway to her mouth. She set it back on the table before adding, “Could you maybe word that a little differently? I think I missed something along the way.”
Dana started at the beginning of the story, telling her friend about Ash’s romance with the other woman and how she’d tried to trap him into marriage by pretending the baby she was carrying was Ash’s. “So that’s what sent him into the downward spiral that his brothers know about, but they’re not aware of the exact cause. They think it’s only a failed relationship.”
“And you’re upset that he was in love with her?” Zoe asked carefully. “It was a long time ago, right?”
“It’s not that,” Dana muttered. “Although no woman likes to think of her man with someone else. The real issue is—I guessed and he confirmed—that the reason he was so ugly to me last year is that when we first met, I reminded him of Fiona.”
Zoe stared at her in shock. “You look like his ex?”
Dana shrugged. “Apparently there’s some resemblance and our personalities are similar. He confessed that when we met, he was freaked out by it. Then every time he was around me, it made him angry because it brought all those memories back. He claims that he has realized it was that he was attracted to me, and as he developed stronger feelings, it was the fear more than any resemblance between us that had him acting like such an ass.”
“Holy shit,” Zoe groaned. “Why am I not surprised? Nothing has been easy for you two, has it? So what happened afterwards? Obviously you’re not happy, and according to Dylan, Ash hasn’t been acting like a man in bliss either.”
“I told him that we needed to take a few weeks and think things over. I wanted him to talk to his brothers about everything that had happened with Fiona and I asked if I could tell you. I need to make sure that he’s able to move forward free of any associations between the two of us. I can’t go through that. I’m in love with him and it already hurts like hell to be separated. I can’t let myself get in even further, only for him to discover that when he looks at me, he still sees her.”
“Oh, honey,” Zoe whispered. “No wonder you’ve been out of sorts. I understand where you’re coming from, but I also know that he’s crazy about you. How long has it been since your last relationship, other than Paul?”
Dana put her arms on the table and decided it wasn’t only Ash who needed to come clean about his past. He was having a drink with Dylan tonight, hopefully doing as she suggested. Now maybe it was time to take her own advice. “Well, you see, I’ve never been seriously involved with anyone before. And here’s the reason why . . .”
Nineteen
Dana opened the door to her apartment several hours later and felt pounds lighter, even after a ton of chips and a heavy meal. She’d left her emotional burden behind her for the first time in fifteen years and it felt amazing. She’d lived her entire adult life carrying around her past baggage and even she hadn’t realized how it had defined her. When the doorbell rang, she smiled, hoping it was Ash. Maybe he’d had the same kind of epiphany after talking to Dylan. Without checking the peephole, she threw the door open and blinked in surprise. Claudia stood there with a sullen expression on her face. “Um, hey,” Dana said uncertainly. “What are you doing here?”
Claudia shoved past her, which left Dana with no choice but to shut the door and follow her into the hallway. “Oh, don’t pretend you haven’t heard. I’m sure your asshole of a boyfriend has been laughing all evening after his mother tossed me and my dad out on our ear.”
Shit! I guess I know why Charlotte called her sons over tonight. She decided to reply honestly. “I really haven’t spoken to Ash in a few days, so I had no idea. I’m sorry that happened, Claudia. Maybe there was some kind of misunderstanding.” That last part was doubtful, but she thought it sounded nice to add.
“Oh, give me a fucking break,” Claudia snarled. “None of them give a damn about what happens to us. We’ve been the outcasts of the mighty Jackson family since the beginning. You’re deluded if you think you’re any different. Even if by some miracle you get Ash to marry you, all you’ll have is his last name. You’ll be a second-class citizen to them.”
Dana had opened her mouth to give the insulting bitch the verbal slap she deserved, when she saw it. At first she thought it was a trick of the lighting, but no, it was so clear in her expression now. The younger woman’s anger was a front for her deeper issues. She was hurting . . . badly. Dana sighed, not really feeling up to this kind of scene, but she realized that Claudia likely had no one else and never had. Bart might dote on his daughter, but he’d obviously missed a few important things along the way. “Why don’t we talk?” Dana suggested gently as she gestured toward the sofa.
“I have nothing to say,” Claudia huffed, crossing her hands defensively over her chest.
“Sit down now, Claudia,” Dana said firmly. A command seemed to be all that she understood or responded to.
Dana followed her and took a seat as well. She decided to wait it out, wanting Claudia to start the conversation. After a few minutes she said, “They never cared about me. I was always some kind of joke to them. Dumb Claudia who can’t even make it through high school without her daddy paying off the principal, much less college. And Dad just made it worse by constantly bragging about how smart I was, even though he knew it wasn’t true. I wanted to quit, but he wouldn’t hear of it. Yet he refused to listen to my teacher in elementary school when she told him I was dyslexic. To him that was like admitting to some horrible disease. Instead of getting me the help I needed, he shelled out Charlotte’s money every time it was necessary.”
“Oh, sweetie,” Dana murmured softly. The pieces were clicking into place, and even though it wasn’t an excuse for Claudia’s behavior, she could understand what had driven her to act out so often. Hadn’t Dana acted similarly in school when faced with bullying and ridicule? Going on the attack was easier than waiting for someone to knock you down first. Oh God, was that what I did with Ash when faced with the prospect of losing him? Did I push him away because I was scared or I wanted to get in the first blow?
Before she could examine the motivation behind her actions any further, Claudia huffed out defiantly, “Don’t you dare feel sorry for me. I’m no one’s victim. I can take care of myself. I allow my dad to
treat me like a baby because that’s what he needs. It’s all for show though. The minute we’re out of sight, he pushes me away. He says it’s the roles we were both given to play, and I have to do my part unless I want him to starve to death.”
Dana shook her head in disgust. Bart had done quite a number on his daughter. The man was nothing more than a con artist. Thank God his wife had apparently reached her limit. “Listen, Claudia, you can stay with me for the night. We’ll figure something out.”
Claudia turned her head away but not before Dana saw the tears she was trying to blink away. When she’d gotten herself under control, she said hoarsely, “I want to get out of here. I have a friend in Miami who’s offered to get me a job where she works. I just need some money to get by for a few weeks until I get my first check.” She looked down, studying her hands before adding, “I asked my dad, but he told me that I was on my own unless he got a big settlement from Charlotte. He said I couldn’t expect him to change his style of living because I couldn’t support myself.”
Father of the year right there, folks. And I thought I had a terrible role model for a father. Dana didn’t have a lot of extra money, but she hadn’t spent what Ash had paid her for the pretend girlfriend gig. She’d been planning to give it back to him since it felt wrong to keep it. But now it was clear to her that Claudia needed it the most, and she thought that Ash would agree when she explained everything to him. So she got up and picked up her purse. She wrote a check to Claudia for two thousand dollars, which was everything that she’d received, and handed it over without hesitation. “This is all that I can afford. I hope it helps. If you get there and run into trouble, please call me and I’ll figure out a way to help.” Claudia’s mouth dropped as she looked at the amount. “I know it’s probably not much to you,” Dana began, “but—”
The younger woman launched herself into Dana’s arms, nearly stealing the breath from her body. “Thank you, Dana. I’ve been perfectly horrible to you, yet you’re the only one who’s willing to help me. I’m so sorry for everything. The coffee, my attitude, all of it.”
“Shhh, it’s forgiven.” She patted the younger woman’s heaving shoulders. “I want you to promise to call me when you get there so I’ll know that you’re safe, all right?”
Claudia nodded. “I will. And good luck with Ash. All that I said earlier was a load of crap. We deserved how they treated us. My dad made sure of that. You’re the only woman he ever brought home or looked at the way he does with you. Just take it from someone who knows—if there’s a chance to be happy, grab it. I wish I had years ago instead of letting my dad fill my head with a bunch of bullshit.”
Dana walked out with her, hugging her once again, then standing in the parking lot until her taillights were out of sight. Strangely enough, Claudia thought that Dana had saved her tonight, but in reality, she may have very well saved Dana because she’d given her the strength and clarity that she needed to break free of her own daddy issues. And the only way to begin that process was to tell Ash exactly why he was the first and only man she’d ever allowed herself to love. Then she hoped they could start over and learn to trust again as two imperfect people who were perfect for each other.
Ash wasn’t proud of the fact that he was lying in bed watching bad reality television when he heard a door shut in the distance. He froze before glancing at the bedside clock. It was almost midnight. That was late even for the odd hours that Rosa kept. Which left only his brothers . . . or Dana. No one else had a key, and security on the property was too tight for any kind of mix-up to happen. So he waited to see who would appear. If it was Rhett, he might actually cry in disappointment, which would give the twerp years of material to taunt him with. He saw a shadow seconds before someone’s presence filled the doorway. His heart skidded to a stop, then galloped. “Hey, baby,” he murmured softly. He held open the sheet he was lying under, silently inviting her to join him. Please. She hesitated only a few seconds, but it felt like an hour. Then she was kicking her shoes off and sliding in next to him. Her scent filled the air and he inhaled it greedily as he pulled her close.
“I was fifteen when my dad left me and my mom. They were never really happy, so it wasn’t a surprise. She was constantly raging about his girlfriends or his drinking. And how she had to work two jobs to support us. When he took off, she became so bitter. Night after night she’d come home and spend hours telling me how he’d ruined her life and that men could never be trusted. I was overweight, which she thought was a good thing. She said I’d never have to worry about a man messing with me because they didn’t like fat girls.”
“Oh, baby,” Ash sighed. “How that must have hurt. I know you were as beautiful then as you are now regardless of what your mother thought of your size.”
She snuggled closer and continued, “Then in high school I was the target of these mean girls. They taunted me mercilessly for months about my weight and the fact that I didn’t have nice clothes. Everything that I owned was old and too tight, which they pointed out constantly. They’d say things like why didn’t I sew some sheets together to make a shirt that fit. It was horrible. I hid in the bathroom through half of my classes, trying to avoid them, but they always found me. Finally I couldn’t take it anymore and my mom was more than happy to let me drop out and go to work. So for the next few years I waited tables in a restaurant. The owner gave me a lot of extra hours and staying on my feet so much slowly helped me lose some of the excess weight. However, instead of being happier about me getting healthy, my mom seemed to hate me for it. We fought constantly. And eventually I couldn’t take it anymore. So I took my last check and left. I moved around a lot, but never formed attachments to people or places. I believed what she said about people always letting you down. I was determined that I wouldn’t end up like her. When I moved here and went to work at the coffee shop, Zoe was the first real friend that I’d had since I was a child. And it took me a long time to trust her. I kept waiting for her to do something to show me that she was like the rest. But she did the exact opposite. She believed in me, which made me feel like I mattered. I’d never had that before from anyone.”
“And I took that security away from you when I began attacking you without any justification. You had one place where you’d found what you needed and I ruined it. Baby, you must have hated me for it. You wanted to run, didn’t you?”
He felt her nod where she lay next to him, and it crushed him. In an attempt to save himself from his demons, he’d unleashed hers. “What stopped you?”
She was quiet for a minute before she admitted in a surprised tone, “My family. Zoe, the girls at the shop, and even Dylan are the only consistent presences I’ve ever had. I might not have known it at the time, but I had been in a relationship from the moment I let Zoe in. No matter how I felt about you, I couldn’t start over again. It would kill me to lose them.”
“Baby, you don’t ever have to do that. If you aren’t able to forgive me, then I’ll move to another location. This is your home and I’d never take that away from you. I love you enough to let you go if that’s what you need from me. I’ll pack up tomorrow and be out of here. The choice is yours.”
It was the most selfless thing he’d ever offered to do, and he meant every word. As hard as it would be, she needed the stability of the friendships that she’d formed. He’d never be able to live with himself if he ruined that for her. She turned until they were lying face-to-face. He could hardly dare to believe his ears when she said, “Then I choose you. They’re my family, but you’re my future. My life truly began the day that we met. It might not have been an easy road, but how can I regret it when it led me to you? As crazy as it sounds, maybe we needed to experience that in order to be free of what had haunted us for so long. I don’t think I’d have been open to a relationship with you otherwise. I’d been too traumatized by my past to accept anything that resembled a normal relationship. Your taunts forced me to look inside myself and it did the sa
me for you. We might not have a fairy-tale kind of romance, but we have love that will go the distance because it’s raw and honest.”
“I love you so much, Dana,” he professed to her. “You opened my eyes and showed me that I had only been going through the motions of living until I met you. Now I’m more alive than I’ve ever felt before. There’s a hope inside of me that I didn’t dare dream existed. Finally I have a woman who truly loves me for who I am, flaws and all. You are the most beautiful and amazing gift I’ve ever received and I’m never letting you go.”
She wrapped her arms tightly around his waist and kissed his lips before saying, “You’d better not, Jackson, or I’ll have Brittany hunt you down. Trust me, you don’t want that.” He laughed as he returned her embrace.
That night they made love truly for the first time, and as they fell asleep in each other’s arms, Asher said a silent prayer of thanks to his horrible ex. For if she hadn’t done what she had, then he’d have missed out on finding the one woman who was meant for him. After all, how many women would rescue a guy from a bar while another girl was licking his armpit? He looked down at Dana, smiling softly. Yeah, she was truly one of a kind.
Epilogue
The wedding was the talk of Pensacola, Florida. Dana didn’t think there had been a single day in recent memory when one of the coffee shop customers wasn’t asking her for all the details. Finally, the big day had arrived, and as she stood in the church holding Ash’s hand, she had to agree that it was indeed worth the wait.
They might have been surrounded by their friends and family, but Judson and Charlotte only had eyes for each other as they took their vows. No one else had been privy to the information, but these two had been in love for many years. Only now were they finally free at the same time to be together.
