Suddenly it clicked in Payton’s head that the gelding was rowdy and called Rowdy. He started to laugh so hard that Crew had to catch him in his arms and prop him against the fence so he wouldn’t fall off.
“Jesus Christ you goofball.” I shook my head fondly and walked over to them. I gave Crew a kiss and then smooched Payton’s cheek.
“How’s it going with him?” Crew asked, nodding at the gelding behind me.
“It’s good. He’s not fast to learn, but when it clicks, he’s very into it.” I smiled and held my arm out as soon as I heard Rowdy stepping behind me. “That’s enough,” I said firmly, and he snorted softly, but stopped approaching. “Good boy.” I handed him a treat without looking.
“Can I give him one?” Payton asked.
“Sure. You know how.”
He held his palm flat and I put a treat on it. Then he smiled wide as Rowdy approached to nimbly pick it off.
“He’s funny. And tickles!” Payton announced.
I nodded. “That’s all true. Let me go put him back in the paddock and I’ll meet you at the cabins.”
“Okay!” Payton started to climb down, and Crew did his best not to hover too much. It was very cute.
My mom and Jenn had bonded even more over the phone after Payton told Mom that he now had a Mimi too.
That in itself was the best thing since sliced bread for Mom. It took me a while to realize that she’d still wanted more for us. It made sense; she’d been there for us until we lost the farm and not living on the same property anymore weighed on her mom and grandma senses.
Now that she knew we had Jenn and Payton had another grandma to dote on him, she relaxed some. Aunt Win told me that Mom had unclenched a little more, which was nice. I wanted the best for her and she’d been through the same things we had right next to us.
She’d agreed to come over for the Harringtons’ big summer party soon. Aunt Win had other engagements she couldn’t cancel, but she’d promised to come visit next time Mom headed over.
I spent every night in the same bed with Crew, whether that was his bed or mine. The intimacy was something I’d never really experienced before, and I reveled in every touch. I couldn’t wait for us to have just one bed to return to at the end of each day. One that was ours.
It was almost funny now how at first, when Payton and I had arrived on the ranch, I’d tried my best not to be interested in or attracted to Crew. Both of those things had been fully instinctual. I hadn’t been able to help either of them.
It took until one night when we were in bed after a long day, just lounging and too tired to do anything other than cuddle, for it to hit me.
“It wasn’t just the fact that you were my boss or a man,” I said quietly.
“What do you mean?” Crew turned his head to look at me in the light of his bedside lamp.
“It was that I could feel this.” I gestured between us. “On some level, from the very beginning, I knew there was potential and it scared the shit out of me. I couldn’t even think to subject Payton to another parental figure leaving him, of course, but I….” Trailing off, I took a deep breath and then exhaled long and slow.
“It was never like it with Vera and me. She’s… not cold, but she just doesn’t have the capability to connect on a deeper level. Not with Payton, and not with me. There’s reasons for that, and that’s why I’m fine with how things happened with her, as much as it hurt at the time.
“But the thing is, I’ve never had this before. I haven’t had a partner who loves me like this just as I am, who wants me in every way, and who loves Payton, too.”
“And that’s scary?” Crew asked quietly.
“Yeah.” I snorted with no humor whatsoever. “If we fell apart, whether it’s two months, two years, or two decades from now, I know Payton would be fine. That kid’s a survivor. It’s in his blood.” From both Vera and I, I’d come to realize. “But I don’t know ifIwould survive. Not… not as I am.”
Crew cupped my cheek and kissed my lips gently. “I don’t think there’s a way to survive unscathed from the kind of love wehave, Malachi. We just have to keep communicating and being honest, and… and love each other and Payton and everyone else through everything that life might throw our way.”
I kissed him back, then relaxed against my pillow. We were quiet for a while, then I asked, “Do you want more kids?”
The way Crew smiled at my statement was kind of amazing. “I love that you consider him mine.”
I grinned. “I know.”
He rolled his eyes. “Brat. But to answer your question, yeah. Probably. But not any time soon. We’re young. We have time. There’s no rush.”
“Maybe one day when we have a house and Payton is a bit older? I don’t care how we would have them, because they’d be ours anyway.”
