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I want her, need her, so badly that I can’t stop claiming her mouth, pulling her down with me to the ground. She kneels in front of me and lets me part her lips with my tongue as I desperately want to get closer.
My hands can’t stop touching her; my tongue can’t stop tasting her.
I’m addicted to the ruin that is us …
Addicted to the warmth she injects in my veins, filling me with the hope that I can be a better person.
For her.
I can do it all.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Accompanying Song: “Only Human” by Cold Showers
Syrena
I know what I did. I know damn right what I unleashed when I made the decision to come back to him.
But I couldn’t stop myself. I couldn’t force myself to stay in a place I really didn’t want to be. I only did it because I thought it was the right thing to do … because of the pain I felt.
All that was just my head trying to make right what had gone wrong, but the thing with hearts is that they can’t ever be fixed. Love isn’t right or wrong, it isn’t easy, and it’s definitely not always healthy.
But this love is undeniable, unshakable, and I can’t ignore what my heart wants.
My need for him has only grown since I left, and when I finally got the chance to speak to him again, everything came pouring out of me. It was the honest truth. The only truth I’ve denied myself for so long.
I knew it the moment I first kissed him that this was more than just a means to an end.
He stole my heart and chained it to his body, and I can never get it back. No matter how hard we both tried to stay away from each other.
He ruined me … and I ruined him.
And if loving him means I’m just as evil as he is, then so be it.
I can live with knowing what he truly is … knowing that he once tried to kill me.
He couldn’t.
And that’s where our fates collided.
Where our hearts melted into one.
Where I was bound to him forever … even if I didn’t know it yet.
I do know now. I know it all, and I accept every inch of responsibility that comes with loving a beast of a man. I have no regrets, whatsoever.
The longer he kisses me, the more I realize I finally made the right decision.
The game we played never was one about freedom or power … it was about our inevitable clash. Like magnets, we drew to each other until nothing was left but him and me.
Around him, I always feel naked. Stripped bare of everything that makes me, me. My past, my present, my future—all together as one. And it’s okay. It’s okay to be vulnerable. It’s okay to be who I am around him because I’m no longer afraid.
And right now, I want nothing more than for him to hold me. Kiss me. Touch me everywhere, and more.
His kisses are feverish and desperate, as if he can’t get close enough, even though I’m already in his arms. His presence surrounds me, towers over me, even on his knees, and I love how small it makes me feel. How when he takes what he wants from me, I feel freed.
He moans softly as his lips leave a trail of wetness all the way down my neck. I can sense his agony and how much he’s yearned for me in the way he kisses me. It’s been so long … too long.
And as my head tilts back, his teeth sink into my shoulder.
I don’t feel the pain. Only the pleasure.
And when he laps up the small trickle of blood, I moan along with him.
It’s bliss.
His hands grasp my breast, squeezing straight through the fabric. His breathing becomes more erratic, his kisses more temperamental as my nipples peak under his fingers. He groans out loud and then tears away my shirt. Ripping it through the middle, he makes me squeal. Within seconds, it’s gone, thrown halfway across the room, and his mouth is all over me, leaving tantalizing licks and kisses wherever he goes.
“I can’t control myself,” he whispers against my skin.
“Then don’t,” I murmur, gasping when he sucks on my nipple.
“God … What did I ever do to deserve you,” he murmurs.
I smile and reach for his pants, unzipping them quickly and pulling out his cock. He’s already hard, bouncing up and down, pre-cum dripping from the tip. As I start to massage him, he rocks along with my movements, groaning like an animal.
His grip on my nipples only tightens, but the sizzling pain feels amazing, and I want nothing more than for him to take me right now.
It’s as if he can sense exactly what I need because his fingers immediately dive underneath my skirt and slide up my thighs. When they reach my panties, he briefly caresses me, making me crave him even more. Then he harshly rips away the fabric, and I cry out in surprise.
