When I’ve calmed down a bit, Georgia sighs, placing a single cup of hot tea in front of me.
“I hate to push, CJ… I really do,” She starts, sitting beside me. Her eyebrows are knitted together as if I’m a puzzle she’s struggling to solve. I curl into myself a bit at her examination. “But we need to know what happened between Marcelo and you. I’ve been around your panic attacks about your mom, and they’ve never beenthisbad. So, what happened?” she asks, chewing on her bottom lip, her eyes darting behind me to Sienna and then back to me.
I sigh. How do I tell them about this? Would they hate me too if they knew? Would they call me an idiot for trusting someone so much? Fuck—
“I…”
The girls lean closer. I gulp, steadying myself trying to find the right words.
“You got this…take your time.” Denver’s voice is probably the softest I’ve ever heard it. She’s looking up at me from the floor, her hand holding mine almost like if she’d let go, I’d disappear.
“Whatever I tell you, please just know that I was stupid, and I would never make that mistake ever again.” My hands are suddenly much more interesting than this conversation. Have these freckles always been here?
“We’dneverjudge you. You’re our sister, if you hurt,wehurt.” Sienna encourages, giving me a reassuring smile.
“Well…um, two years ago Marce—Marcelo and I started dating and everything was fine. We were fine. You guys saw us, we were so h–happy.” My voice cracks as my cheeks heat up.
Georgia squeezes my knee and nods with a small smile. The action gives me just a bit more strength, but I can’t look at my friends as I lay down the most embarrassing pieces of myself out in the open.
“Then on December 4th, we had a party at his place. You know, it was typical Brighton shit. They’d throw parties before big games, and they were playing SFU and… Fuck.” My throat catches, snot rolls from my nose before I hastily wipe it away.
When did I start crying? I don’t cry, not really.
I sigh. “Everyone was looking for Marce…Marcelo and I went to find him. He—he was shooting up steroids and I just flipped. I was hysterical and he was angry, and it was just—”
I pause as flashes of that night speed through my brain.
“It was so…bad. I told him I would tell someone and that was the dumbest thing I could’ve ever said because then he… um. He brought up our… tape.” I gulp, my body shakes as I look up, peering at my friends.
Georgia’s mouth forms an ‘O’ as her breathing shakes, she clasps my free hand—Denver and Sienna look murderous and I feel like the biggest idiot in the world.
“I knew that he’d recorded us, and I trusted him. ItrustedMarcelo so much that I never thought he’d throw it in my face.” My lips are drying as I speak, the water from my tears drink my body arid.
“He said that if I were to tell anyone then he’d drop it—the tape, I mean. I didn’t believe him. Marcelo bluffs about everything. But then, I told Karmen—my roommate…um. And well, everyone slowly began to ice me out. It was so hard to talk aboutanythingwhen I went from being the most liked to the most hated all within the span of a week.”
Sienna scoffs from behind me, I feel her as she scoots into my back and wraps her arms around my waist. She’s warm, I’m thankful for her touch as she lays her head on my back whispering quiet curses.
“And then he and I came to an agreement that for four thousand dollars, this would be over—stupid, I know. But it was over for about a week until… until… the texts started. So, I left. And they’ve been texting me from unknown numbers ever since. I don’t think it’s him though, he’d never threaten me—”
“He threatened to expose your most intimate moments! Don’t stand up for him.” Georgia scoffs, running a shaky hand through her waves.
“Yeah…well, he wouldn’t harass me.”
This catches Denver’s attention. “And how exactly do you know that?”
“He’s not the type, when he gets what he wants he leaves you alone. Besides, he’s tried to reach out to me before—”
“HE WHAT?!” Sienna jumps up from behind me, crossing over Denver and straight into my line of focus. “Give me his number,” she demands.
“Huh?”
“Give me that bitch’s number! He’s been fucking you over for almosta year, Cleo. I will kill that motherfucker—”
“Calm down, Si Si… Don’t go allThe Brideon us.” Georgia sighs exasperatedly as she leans back into the couch.
Denver eyes me for a long seconds before stalking towards the kitchen. Moments later, she arrives back with my phone and a bottle of Vodka.
“Is this the reason why you’ve been inactive?” she asks, opening the phone up. We all shared passwords in case of emergencies.
