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started. “Will you motherfucking marry me?” I shouted the question loud enough so that everyone in the restaurant who wasn’t already staring at us was now turned our way. Dre giggled and surprised me by getting down on her knees so that we were eye to eye.
She surprised me even further when she grabbed my face and planted a kiss to my lips. As the restaurant erupted in confused applause that sounded a lot like a slow golf clap gone wrong she whispered in my ear.
“Yes. I’ll motherfucking marry you.”
DELETED PREPPY PART ONE SCENE
PREPPY
It’s been two fucking days without fucking my girl.
Not even a fucking handy.
Marriage is bullshit.
I got out of my car and spotted Bear crouched down in the driveway meticulously polishing his bike with a rag. King’s bike was next to his, already shining. It fucking sucked that it would be a long whole before he would get to see it again. “Where the fuck have you been?”
“Why? You miss me, Beary-Poo?” I sang. I patted Bear on the ass as I passed behind him and I leapt out of the way just before he could swat the back of my leg. A move that has taken me down a hundred too many times before. I took a cigarette out from behind my ear and lit it. I took a drag and pointed my fingers holding the cigarette at Bear. “I think we’ve been friends long enough that you should know that I’m not into you that way. I don’t do dudes.”
“Fuck off.” Bear said, his own cigarette in his mouth moving up at down between his lips as he spoke. He turned his attentions back to his bike.
“I don’t want to fuck you, Bear.” I said, shrugging my shoulders. “I just want to make that clear. There shouldn’t be any lies between us now that I’m the man of the house and you’re the first lady.”
“Prep,” Bear warned.
I threw my arms up in the air. “Fine, if you insist you can watch me lay down some D next time. Okay? Will that make you happy?”
“Prep.” Bear warned with a little more growl. Pushing him was one of my most favorite activities. Next to fucking of course
And tetherball. I fucking loved tetherball.
“Okay, okay, Bear. I’ll make you a jerk off video, but that’s it. And only because we’re friends and I’m supportive of your lifestyle.” I said. “Gosh, the things I do for you.” I stomped out my cigarette and took the porch steps two at a time.
I’d already gone into the house and was in my room with the lap -top cued up and camera in place when through the open window I heard Bear shout, “I swear to Christ Prep, if you send me another fucking jerk-off video I’m going to put a bullet in your fucking skull and throw you in the bay.”
Promises promises.
I dropped my pants and hit record.
DELETED TYRANT SCENE (When I was going to bring Preppy back initially)
KING
Preppy leapt down the stairs three at a time, holding his open lap top in one hand. "Where is it?" he asked frantically, pressing keys with one hand.
"Where is what?" I asked.
"Where is...EVERYTHING! Fifteen years’ worth of debauchery...it's all GONE!"
"I deleted it." Bear said calmly. "You're welcome."
"YOU DID FUCKING WHAT!" Preppy roared, his face turning from white to red to purple.
"You told me to, fucker. I'm a good friend. I respected your last wishes." Bear said, taking a swig of his beer.
"I said no such motherfucking thing!" Preppy put down the lap top on the coffee table and this time used two hands to tap on the keys. "It can't be gone. It just can't!"
"Dude, don't you remember?" I asked him.
"Remember what!? Preppy said, not looking up from the blank screen.
"You told us that if anything were to ever happen to you that you wanted us to delete your hard drive immediately." I said.
Preppy's eyes shot up and met mine. "Oh my fucking god, and you actually listened to me!"
"Yep." Bear said, amusement in his eyes. "I sure did, but not before I saw what you had going on there you little fucking freak. Love the home videos. Let me guess, the girls didn't know you were filming them." He teased.
"You watched!" Preppy's eyes went wide. Horror written across his face.
"Just for an hour or so. You're a fucking freak, but I had to fast forward through certain parts, there is only so much a guy can see his friends dick."
"You fucking jerked off to my fucking homemade porn?" Preppy asked, sinking to the floor.
"Only twice. Maybe three times." Bear teased.
"It's all fucking gone." Preppy said, hugging his lap top to his chest like it was a puppy who had just been run over by a car. "All gone." He whispered. "Asian twins, chicks with dicks...it's all fucking gone."
It was the only time in my life I’d ever seen Preppy cry.
