My brain still hasn’t processed that I’m safe, and every time I drift off to sleep, I dream about Dennis’s deep voice and his bruising touch. I turn onto my side so that Seb can’t see me cry.
When we reach the hospital, I tell the FBIeverythingabout Dennis. He’s presumed dead, so I don’t know if it matters anymore, but talking about my trauma, even to strangers, feels a bit cathartic.
The doctors do a bunch of tests on me, which seems redundant after everything the EMT did, but I endure their poking and prodding. Seb and B hover like mother hens, and it’s the cutest thing I’ve ever seen. Eventually, I’m told that I don’t have a concussion, and a nurse treats and wraps my foot. The guys take the instructions on how to care for me very seriously, asking questions about changing the dressing and medication doses.
I let them focus on the details because I’m exhausted.
I stare out the window blankly as we make the drive back to Vancouver. It makes the most sense to stay at Seb and Marcus’s place for now, so I’m not surprised when we pull into the parking garage.
Numbness pervades my body as we take the elevator up to the sixteenth floor, and when we get inside, I go straight to Sebastian’s bedroom and climb into his bed, pulling the covers up to my neck and burying my face in the soft pillow.
I curl into a ball and close my eyes, trying to forget the last twenty-four hours, but my thoughts are mingling with memories of the past, and I’m having a hard time telling the difference. I wonder if I’ll ever be able to shake this empty, cold feeling that’s creeping into my brain like insidious tentacles. I hear the guys’s voices as I drift in and out of sleep. They sound worried. I’m worried too.
One month later…
I’m finally startingto feel like myself again.
I convinced B and Seb to take me to Aiden’s to get my car now that it’s mid-March and the weather is warming, but we’re making a stop at my dad’s cabin first.
The gravel road up Mount Baker is clear now. I packed an overnight bag because I want to try to stay for the weekend. I was afraid to come back at first. I thought Dennis had tainted it, but coming off my depressive episode made me realize that the warm, fuzzy memories far outnumber the bad.
My road to recovery was a little easier than I thought it would be. Physically, I was fine within a couple weeks, but I struggled with nightmares and manic episodes. Thankfully, my found family has been so understanding. Charlie and the guyscame and stayed in Vancouver for a week, and Charlie spent every day with me in bed eating Twizzlers and watching episodes ofThe Vampire Diaries.
Anna even came to visit one afternoon. I’m not sure how she found out what happened, but I suspect the guys had something to do with it. We talked about mundane life updates, but it felt good—like I was finally normal. She even joked that she must be hard to get over if I had to resort totwococks as a rebound fuck. That made me giggle.
As for the guys, they’re adjusting well to the throuple life even though I haven’t been up for any group activities since our last night in Lakeside. They’ve spent the last few weeks getting their lives back on track after our extended absence from the real world.
Seb is, of course, in the pub working his ass off, and he took on some cooking duties again, which made him happy. Marcus loved his menu proposals, so now Seb’s working on hiring a worthy chef for the Seattle location. There’s some fancy cooking award that he’s been going on about, and his determination and dedication are infectious.
B applied to be a junior hockey coach. Even though he can’t go hard, he can still skate, so teaching kids seemed like a good fit without him having to give up hockey entirely. His application was accepted quickly, and he starts next month. I’m so fucking proud of him.
I haven’t thought about my future at all over the past several months being preoccupied with my stalker stepdad and all. Originally, I thought it’d be nice to get into the film industry, but after a bit of research, it turns out that my theater degree won’t get me very far. So for now, I’m looking into positions at some of the local performing arts centers—I might even try out for a play, who knows.
With Dennis out of the picture, I got my mom’s inheritance without any issues. It’s still sitting there, untouched. I’m consideringdonating it all to the Herren Project, a nonprofit that supports victims of addiction and substance abuse. I want the money to help someone.
I smile when we pull into the driveway and come to a stop. While there’s still little piles of snow around, most of it has melted, revealing emerald undergrowth—moss and ferns—and bluish-green spruce pines.
I watch as Sebastian and Brantley gather our belongings. B is holding a bag of groceries to his chest protectively.
“When did you even have time to buy that?” Seb asks, shooting him an annoyed glance while he pulls out my bag. “I told you not to bring that garbage. I want us to have some real home-cooked meals.”
“Having Lucky Charms and ketchup chips on hand is hardly going to negate your gourmet cooking, grumpy bear.”
Seb gives B a hard look, but I see the softness in his eyes. “Fine, but eating in the living room only. I don’t want crumbs in the bed. And no snacking too close to dinner.”
“Yes, Daddy,” B snarks, batting his eyes at him like a brat.
Seb glares, and I snicker, which earns me a glare as well.
“What? I didn’t bring the junk food,” I say innocently.
“No, but you encouraged it. And now I know why you were distracting me in the office this morning,” he says, giving me a pointed look.
Brantley glances at me in surprise, and I give him a wink. The quick blowie I gave Seb was the first time I’ve really been intimate with either of them, other than kissing and cuddling. But today finally felt different—and my body is screaming for an orgasm, stat.
We bring in our stuff, and I start putting a few things away when I notice Seb standing on the deck, staring out at the creek. I walk outside and slide my arms around his waist with a content sigh.
“Are you okay?” I ask, placing my cheek against the back of his shoulder.
