“No,” Lark says slowly, cradling Eevi close. “But after that gremlin…he’ll be watching us closely.”
“Good. Then he’ll see a loving father. Right, Happy girl? He’ll see how you love yourIsä.”
“I’m not herIsä. Not yet.”
“Are you joking?” I hold Lark’s gaze, wishing I could read his thoughts. “Look at her. Has Eevi ever had another father? Anyone who loves her the way you do? You’re herIsäno matterwhat some hearing says, but they’ll see it too. We won’t give them any other choice.”
I want to kiss the worried frown from his lips and smooth the lines from his brow. Inhale his intoxicating spicy scent that envelops me each night. But the worry that I let him down is eating at me.
I watch him lay Eevi down, worry knotting in my belly. “I’m sorry, Lark.”
“Shh.”
My stomach swoops. Is he mad? “If you want to yell at me, I’d understand.”
Lark's eyes flare, and he strides purposefully toward me. “Do not apologize. Never apologize to me.”
“I—”
“No. My turn to talk. You…” He tosses his hat onto the bed and runs his hands through his gloriously messy hair. His ears twitch. Then he backs me up against the wall. “I don’t want to hear apologies when all I want is to kiss every last word you said out there out of your mouth.”
“Wh—but Niemi is gone. You don’t have to.”
“Oh,ihana, it wouldn't be for anyone but me.” He places one hand on my face, the other beside my head on the wall, surrounding me in his cardamom scent. “No one has ever,everstood up for me like that. You have no idea how that made me feel. How I feel now. How badly I want you. Tell me you want me too.”
“Y-yes.”
He captures my lips in a scorching kiss and doesn't stop until I'm gasping for breath. My toes curl at the way his mouth moves over mine, sending a shiver down my spine like he spun me barefoot into the snow, then pulled me back into fiery heat. My thoughts scatter, my hands clench in his shirt, and for a breathless moment, nothing feels pretend.
I went from worried I’d messed up to flying high in Lark’s embrace. Despite all the times we’ve kissed or cuddled at night, I feel like I’ll never get enough of him, of his mouth on mine and his body reacting to my touch. It’s over far too soon.
"What—what was that for? And don’t say more practice.”
He brushes a lock of hair from my cheek with a smile. “A thank you. You unleashed all that fire and ice on muskrat-face like I was worthy, and I’ve never wanted to kiss anyone more. No more practicing. There was nothing pretend about that.” Then he leans in and kisses a hot line up the side of my throat that has my back arching into him. “And if there wasn’t a house full of kids around us, I’d want to do a lot more.”
I’m panting for breath. It’s a good thing we’re done practicing because I’m not sure how much better we can get at that, though I’m willing to keep trying.
Lark smooths my shirt before tending to his own. “I’ll go finish lunch.”
“Lunch! I forgot.” Blushing at his wink, I hurry after him. I may not be the most useful in the kitchen yet, but with Lark, it's okay. I can be myself, shortcomings and all, because he makes it easy to feel like enough.
More than anyone I've ever met, I just plain like him, and I like myself more around him.
Now if I could only do the same for him and get him to see that he's more than enough for these kids, just the way he is.
Chapter 23
Lark
The day after our final performance, the cottage is quieter than usual. No rehearsals, no gremlins, no shouts over messes or missing boots. Should I be suspicious?
Katja, Val, and the twins have claimed the kitchen table, papers spread between them as they plot out a new play for the queen’s attendance at the Trade Light festival. The festival once marked the thaw and the start of trade season. Now, towns cling to it for cheer, even with the routes permanently snowed in.
Aili is drawing costumes in the margins of Katja’s drafts. The twins are arguing over whether we should use a dragon or a troll this time. Helkki is hanging upside down from the top of the bookcase, calling out random lines of dialogue.
What a beautiful, normal afternoon.
At the table, Val fits in with the others like she always belonged here. I can’t tear my eyes away from her bright smile as she listens to all the little beasties’ ideas and offers her own thoughts here and there. The longer she’s with us, the more I catch myselfwatching how she shines. I love seeing her like this. And that kiss!Drowning Deep, that kiss.
