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“Not sure.” Whenever I saw Fender with Melanie in public, she was always right at his side. “But I’m sure if Melanie asked, he would give her whatever she wanted. And it’s a big place…easy to duck into another room.”
She gave a slow nod. “I haven’t seen her in so long… How is she?”
“She’s treated very well—from what I’ve gathered.”
“That’s good.” Her gaze shifted to look out the window, the natural light coming in and lighting up her face. Her hands rested on the edge of the counter, and she got lost in her thoughts.
I drank my coffee and studied her. “What are you thinking?”
She shook her head slightly, her gaze still out the window. “That I want to see Melanie, but I don’t want to spend my evening with a bunch of rich people when I can be here…with you.”
Being stripped down naked and dragged into the open by a madman hadn’t changed her desire for me. Her nails sliced into my skin, she breathed into my mouth, and she whispered my name like it would live on the tip of her tongue for the rest of her life. I preferred to be on top because I liked feeling those nails carve my back, liked pressing her into the mattress underneath me as I claimed her as mine, liked feeling those sexy legs around my waist. But every time she got on top of me, I couldn’t believe how good it was.
She fucked me good.
That night, she moved off me then turned around, on all fours, her back arched, her ass up.
The moonlight outlined her sexy curves, the deep curve in her lower back, the perkiness of her cheeks. Her long hair stretched down the center of her back, the curls falling out as the day progressed.
But all I could see were the scars.
Even in the darkness, I could see them…because I knew exactly what to look for.
I’d held that whip in my hand and beat her with it. I’d sliced open her skin, made her lose enough blood that she almost slipped under. I’d hit her again and again and watched her body grow weak then hang from the branch. It was one of the worst moments of my life. The pain and the shame made me sick to my stomach.
I couldn’t handle the sight, so I looked away.
When I didn’t move behind her, she looked over her shoulder. “Magnus.”
I wouldn’t look at her. “I told you I don’t want to look at it.” My gaze was turned to the window, partially obstructed by the curtains. When we were in bed together and I opened my eyes to her bare back, I always turned the other way. I did whatever I could to pretend the scars never happened, and the only way I could do that was by not looking at them.
“Magnus…” She turned her body so she was back on the bed, lying down with her body propped up, looking at me.
Now that I couldn’t see her scars, I shifted my gaze back to her.
“You have to accept me as I am.”
I clenched my jaw and shook my head. “You know that’s not the problem.”
She crawled toward me, moving on top of me so her hair dragged across my chest as she moved. “We’ve both done things for and to each other that change the way we look, but we’re still the same.” Her hand moved over my chest, over my heart. “You did what you had to do to keep me alive.”
“It still…” It still killed me.
“I forgive you.” She moved her forehead to mine and rested it there, her hand over my heart, her hair on my chest. “Now, be with me.” She pressed her lips to mine and gave me a deep and purposeful kiss, her mouth taking mine before she kissed me again and again, her tongue greeting mine and bringing me back to the moment. Then she pulled away, moved back to where she was, and looked at me over her shoulder.
I tried not to let the past come into that room and infect me with misery. I tried not to think about the way the whip felt in my grasp, tried not to think about the crack it made once it hit her skin. When it was just her and me, we forgot about our unfortunate existence and everything that had been done to both of us.
I leaned over her and pressed a kiss between her shoulder blades, my lips feeling the bumps over her scarred skin, the welts that had never really gone away. I listened to her breathe harder as she savored my kiss like she enjoyed it. I moved farther down her spine and to her ass, my face moving between her legs to kiss the area that was plenty wet.
