“No,” I say. “I’ll tell her everything later, once I’ve figured out what I’m going to do. Just keep standing here with me for a second, okay?”
“Okay. Hey,” she murmurs into my chest. “I love you.”
“I know, Joey,” I breathe. “I love you, too.”
It’s fifteen minutes before we’re due to go on stage when the headlines break with a picture of Johanna and me backstage and all of the dirty details of our conversation.
Grayson Harris (@catastrophically_gray), front man of Catastrophically Charismatic, and sister Johanna (@johannaraeharris) share an emotional moment backstage in San Francisco over news about dying mother—will estranged son Grayson return home to say goodbye?
Of all of the things I could’ve been worried about after reading it, the one thing I’m the most grateful for is that Mia already knows. There’s a definite part of me hating that the choice of the rest of who knows has been taken away from me, because there isn’t a soul in the world who doesn't know now.
“Have you seen this?” Mia asks, rushing over to me with her phone in hand. “Who am I kidding? Of course you have, or your face wouldn’t look like that.”
I’m always forgetting how well this woman can read me.
“Yeah,” I say. “They’ve made me out to be a fucking monster, Mia.”
When Catastrophically Charismatic first hit the music scene, front man Grayson Harris always thanked his father, the late guitarist Jonah Harris, for his musical success.
Up until now, there has been little mention of Grayson Harris’ mother and her role in the rock star’s life. An anonymous source reveals a conversation between Harris and his sister, model Johanna Harris (pictured above), proves rumors that Grayson and his mother are, in fact, estranged.
Apparently, it will take more than a terminal cancer diagnosis to get Harris to return to his hometown of Cumberland, Maine, even when asked. This leaves long-time Catastrophically Charismatic fans questioning Harris and his character.
The biggest question: will he or won’t he return home to say his goodbyes?
The article paints me in a light that I know isn’t who I really am, but my recent thoughts and actions seem to reflect exactly what the article is saying.
“You’re not a monster,” Mia says confidently, holding both of my hands in hers. “The people who wrote this? They don’t know you. You’ll make the right choice for you, and that’s what matters.”
“You’re going to have to remind me of that,” I tell her. “A lot.”
“I’ll tell you every day if I have to,” she assures me. “Now, please, go play your show and be amazing like I know you are.”
She presses a kiss to my lips before handing me my guitar and sending me off in the direction of the stage.
“You good?” Eric asks, putting his hand on my shoulder and looking me directly in the eye to make sure I’m not lying to him. “We don’t have to do this if you don’t want to.”
“I want to,” I say firmly. “Let’s fucking go.”
Chapter nineteen
"Hesitate" - Steve Moakler
Mia
The article about Grayson, Johanna, and their mother has had me in a rage since it came out the night before, and it infuriates me how tactless they are. Even more so, in addition to the sneaky photo of Gray and Johanna in the hallway, they had the audacity to use pictures I’d taken from previous shows. Grayson has never been in the limelight like this before, andthe success from the pop-up show has definitely increased their media attention in a way none of us could’ve imagined.
I’ve never been one to get invested in the tabloids and the lives of celebrities, even though a little bit of that is in my job description. The extent of my celebrity gossip knowledge is gained by glancing at the magazines in the check out aisle at the grocery store. I’m not completely naive—I know the people behind the gossip columns can be ruthless. I just never imagined that the subject of one of their articles would be someone I care about so deeply.
As someone who usually has a relatively easy time reading people, it frustrates the hell out of me how this particular aspect of Grayson continues to elude me. After arriving in New York the night before, I can tell his internal debate on whether or not to go see his mother is continuing to eat him alive, but there’s nothing I can do or say to make the decision easier on him. This is something he needs to decide all on his own, and I can’t tell which way he’s leaning.
I sit on the couch in the band’s dressing room for a rare moment of solitude. I brought my laptop so I can work on editing some of the photos from the festival in San Francisco. The guys are finishing up their soundcheck at the new venue, and Rylee has gone to watch and see if they can snag a few new interview subjects. If I had to guess, Johanna is off somewhere pretending she’s not watching Brandon, and I stifle a laugh thinking about it.
While I love watching the guys play, I had been searching for some time alone to process the news article and the aftermath of its release.
“There’s my girl,” Grayson says, coming through the door. I’m so lost in my photos, I hadn’t heard the music from the stage come to a stop. “Everything okay?”
I look up at him and close my laptop. His hair and face glistens with the sweat of being under the hot lights of the stage and his cheeks are tinted a bright pink.
