I pulled it over my head and stood, searching the cave floor for my pants, my boots.
“Talk to me, Sera. Tell me what you’re thinking that’s made you so ill at ease suddenly.”
I looked up at him dumbfounded. He looked so relaxed, so full of some hope and optimism that had no place in our situation.
I was becoming wound like a spring, imagining that Aben and Britaxia would reach Orin soon. Behr would call his armies back from Windemere. Even if he didn’t turn them on Darkwatch—on his own brother—my people would be left at the mercy of Penjan.
I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to block out some of the anxiety I felt.
His hands on my face surprised me. I opened my eyes. “Talk to me, my love,” he said. I felt the whisper of his breath against my lips.
I shook my head. “I…I cannot beyourlove, Io. I cannot go to Darkwatch with you, and you know this.”
He took a deep breath, looking at me as though I was being ridiculous.
I clenched my jaw and pushed back from him. “I won’t go, Io,” I said. “If you won’t take me to Orin, I’ll climb down from this fucking mountain myself and find someone who will.”
“Sera—”
“No,” I said, cutting him off. My anger was suddenly a wild thing in my chest. "This,” I said, gesturing around and between us, “—is a really beautiful dream...but that’s all it is. Did you plan to send a bird and say, ‘I'm sorry, brother. Please forgive me for stealing your bride, and if it's not too much trouble can you still send your armies to her kingdom?’"
He looked down at me, expression neutral, but I noticed his jaw was tight.
He didn’t answer, though, so I went on, my words shrill and panicked. "We will start another war, Io. And lose the one I’m already fighting."
"There will not be another war, Sera.”
“How can you say that? Even Aben is worried about what Behr will do. I saw it myself.”
“You have to trust me.”
I shook my head. “I won’t go,” I said.
“You will go,” he replied matter-of-factly. I thought I saw something dark moving in the depths of his black eyes.
His tone and the words infuriated me. “Do you plan to drag me there?”
“If I have to,” he said, cocking a brow.
I shook my head, teeth grinding together. “And then what? We hide in Darkwatch while Penjan destroys my kingdom? I certainly don’t have the men to defend it. I might have thirty thousand with all the fyrds combined, Io. Do you even havethatmany dragon riders? Against a million elves—with wyverns and shadow walkers—those reeking dead soldiers, and who knows what else!"
I was nearly shouting by then. Some part of me felt guilty for that, but I was angry and…desperate for him to give me some small kernel of hope—some reason to let myself believe I could belong with him.
"I never expected you to abandon your people. I told you we will take Windemere back ourselves."
"You do not have enough men!" I cried, exasperated that he seemed not to have heard anything I’d said.
"Iwillhave enough, Sera." He was making an attempt to keep his tone even, but I could see the way the words had come from between his clenched teeth. He was angry at me.
I was not deterred by it. He had no right to his anger. He was being willfully blind and stupid. "How?" I demanded. "How will we take back Windemere? How will you have enough men? Can you truly be hoping your brother will forgive you, and that the lords of Nightfall will allow their armies to march for the queen who broke his betrothal contract?"
He closed his eyes as though he needed to control his temper. "I asked you to trust me, Sera. Why can't you have a little gods damned faith in me?"
His words positively infuriated me. "How can I trust you when you won’t even tell me what your reasons are? If you want me to truly trust you, then tell me your plan—give me some reason why this won't all fall apart around us. Give me a reason to trust you!"
"It's not as simple as that, Sera. But I do have a plan."
"Then fucking tell me!"
