She pulls out the chair next to mine and places it in front of me, sitting down. “I never said he wasn’t a good guy. But you’d be dumb not to look at his flaws and at least think about whether or not you can handle his emotional roller coaster your entire life.”
“What emotional roller coaster?”
“Summer, I know what’s going on here.”
“You do?” I’m half relieved the secret is out and half scared.
She lifts her chin. “Justin is bipolar.”
“Oh, no.” I drop my head into my hands.
“Don’t tell me you haven’t noticed it too. One night, he’s the life of the party, and then the next time we see him, he’s serious and formal and doesn’t remember anything from the last conversation. It’s like he’s a completely different person.”
That’s because he is a completely different person.
“It’s bizarre. No wonder you’re so sad all the time. It’s difficult dealing with mentally imbalanced people.”
“Mom”—I laugh, shaking my head—“Justin is…”
“I don’t know why you’re laughing. Mental illness isn’t funny. It’s real, and he needs help.”
“I know that,” I defend, not wanting to seem like I’m making light of the situation, but that isn’t happening here. It’s time to tell her the truth as soon as she lets me get a word in. “I can explain—”
“Summer, you don’t have to shoulder this burden alone.”
“Mom.”
“No, let me say this.” She holds her hand up. “Justin and his split personalities are a lot to take on. You don’t have to agree to marry him tonight. You can, and youshouldtake some time to think about if you can handle it. And in the meantime, I suggested to Justin that he get on some medication if he isn’t already—you know, to control the swings in his personality.”
“Oh, my gosh! You did not tell him that.” I’m dying. In my efforts to make things easy, I’ve made them more difficult than climbing Mt. Everest.
“I did. I told him that I would give him my blessing if I saw more of the side of him that really cherished you. The guy that came to the Turkey Stuff, the light parade, family game night withflawtas, Noel Night, or even the Mistletoe-Down. Those were the times I saw how good you two are together. I saw it in his eyes and in yours—you love each other. But every other time, you both had lost the light, the spark between you. So I told him he needed to look at his medication doses or see what he did those particular days to control his mood swings, and if we can get that side of him always, I’d be happy to welcome him into the family.”
Everything she’s mentioning are times when Caleb was with me. Not Justin. I don’t even know what to make of that, and I can’t think through it right now because if I don’t stop my mom, she’ll have Justin committed to a mental hospital before the end of this conversation.
“Mom!” I put my hands on her shoulders to get her attention.
“What?”
“Justin does not have bipolar disorder.”
“Are you sure?”
“I’m sure.”
“Then I don’t know what to think!” She throws her arms up, moving my hands off her. “We’ve all been trying to figure this out. I mean, Juliet even suggested that maybe there are two of them—you know because of the twin brother. But that’s just crazy. Summer, the whole thing is crazy!”
I knew Juliet was sniffing this out.
My mom puts her hands on my knees again, looking me in the eye. “But if I knew that he was going to be the good Justin all the time, I wouldn’t hesitate to give him our blessing. Because when he’s good, he’s really good for you. And when he’s the other guy, you’re not your best self. I want him to make you happy all of the time, not just some of the time. You’re my baby girl.”
I close my eyes, drawing in a steadying breath.
“There’s something I need to tell you about the guy you’re describing. The good version of Justin that you love.”
“Okay.”
“He’s not bipolar. He’s—”
