“But you know, Erin moved to Denver with Tommy,” I offer, trying to give her some hope even though hope is the last thing I want her to have.
“I know. I guess that’s just what you have to do in life even though you hate it.” She flips her head to me. “What about you? Do you have a home?”
I laugh because her questions are so innocent. “Yes, I have a home.”
“And where would that be?”
“It’s in Arizona.”
“The Davidson brothers just can’t seem to get enough of that place.”
“Well, our parents moved out here for a slower pace of life, but Phoenix will always be home to me and Justin.”
“I see.” The disappointment on her face is endearing and gives me encouragement I shouldn’t have.
“I say that, but really I haven’t been home to Arizona for a while.”
“So it just sits vacant?”
“No, I rent it out as an Airbnb.”
“Oh.” Her brows drop at the exact same time her lips purse into a frown.
“What?” I try to steal a glance at her while gliding my skis forward. “You don’t like that?”
“Home and family are so important to me. I can’t imagine having a home and never living in it. Like all your Christmas decorations would just be a waste.”
I smile at her. “I don’t have any Christmas decorations.”
“That’s what I’m talking about. I think it’s sad that you don’t have any Christmas decorations.”
“Is it really my lack of Christmas decorations that makes you sad, or just my lifestyle in general?”
“I don’t know. I guess your lifestyle in general. I just can’t imagine not having a home and a family and everything that comes with it. So much so that I’m stressed that if I marry Justin, I’ll have to move away someday.”
“I think home can be anywhere you make it as long as you’re with the people you care about.”
“I guess.”
“Did I ever tell you the real reason why I came to Telluride?”
“Because of Lars. You wanted to build better relationships with your family.”
“That’s definitely part of it. Lately, something’s been missing in my life. No matter how many bridges I jumped off, I couldn’t shake the feeling that I wanted more, that Ineededmore. Losing Lars showed me how important having a family is. Yeah, I have an empty house in Phoenix, but I don’t always want an empty house. I want to fill it with a future that gives me more excitement than free-falling through the air.”
“And what’s in that future?”
“A family of my own. I’m ready for that in my life.”
“Caleb, if that’s what you want, then I have no doubt you’ll make it happen. You’re the kind of guy that puts your mind to something and lets nothing stand in your way until you accomplish it.”
“I think achieving this goal will be a little harder than other things I’ve done in my life.” Especially since the more time I spend with Summer, the more I think about what it would be like to build a life with her—the one woman I can’t have.
“Eh, you’re cute enough.” She smiles. “I’m sure some woman somewhere out there will take pity on you.”
Her statement makes me grin. “You think I’m cute?”
“Uh…” She smiles, looking down. “I said you’re cute enough. I didn’t say that I find you cute.”
