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My grandmother studied me. “Do you like it?”
The mass grave flashed before me. “Not always. But it’s necessary. And important.”
Grandma Frida grinned. “Then do it. Don’t listen to them.”
“It’s not that simple,” Mom said.
“It is.” Grandma Frida looked at Alessandro. “Are you planning on sticking around and helping her?”
“I am.”
Connor opened his mouth, his expression harsh. Nevada rested her fingers on his arm. “You’re not going to talk her out of this. She’s protecting us.”
Connor frowned.
“I’ll explain later,” she said.
Arabella snapped her fingers. “So that’s where the money’s coming from. I was wondering why we’re suddenly bucks up.”
“How up?” Leon asked, suddenly excited.
“We’re making three times what we used to,” Arabella told him.
Leon gave me a thumbs-up.
“So that’s why,” Bern said.
“Why what?” Runa asked him.
“Why her answer is always yes.”
Runa waited.
“When we need something, the answer is yes,” Bern elaborated. “New sensors and camera system, yes.” He looked at Leon. “New Hawk 7 rifle and a new car, yes.” He looked at Patricia. “Additional personnel and upgraded vests, yes. We get all the toys, bells and whistles, because she’s a Deputy Warden and she is making all the new money for us.”
“Okay.” Mom crossed her arms on her chest. “This doesn’t leave the room. You don’t know she’s the Deputy Warden, you don’t know what a Warden is, and you think Linus is an old family friend. That’s all.”
Mom waited. Nobody said anything.
“I need a ‘yes, ma’am’ on this.”
“Yes, ma’am,” we chorused. Even Patricia and Regina said it.
Mom fixed Runa with her sniper stare. “Do you want to be a part of this family?”
Runa nodded.
“Then don’t be a blabbermouth. Moving on.”
We ran through the security measures again. One by one, the kitchen emptied. Grandma Frida decided to lie down after all. Leon took off, Arabella did too, Bern and Runa followed. Patricia and Regina left as well. Patricia had a calculating look in her eyes, which meant she was reshuffling our security arrangements in her head.
The crowd in the kitchen dwindled to just Mom, Connor and Nevada, and Alessandro and me.
“Do you know what you’re doing?” Mom asked me.
“Yes.”
Mom sighed. “I don’t know how to talk to you, Catalina. I always know when your sisters are keeping something from me. Neither one of them is good at it, and eventually it explodes out. You hid this from me for half a year and I had no idea.”
I raised my head. “You hid Victoria Tremaine from us for our whole lives and none of us had any idea. I guess I’m like you, then.”
“That’s what scares me.” Mom shook her head. “If you’re in trouble, will you even tell me?”
“I will try.”
Mom sighed again.
Nevada turned to me, gently patting her stomach. “I owe you an apology.”
“No.”
“Yes. My back was against the wall and I made a terrible decision. There is no way to take it back. At the time that was the only way I could see to preserve House Baylor’s future.”
“It was my fault,” Connor said. “I should have found Merritt.”
“We should have found Merritt,” Nevada said. “Catalina, you know how important you are to me. I hate that I made you think that I was mad at you and that you betrayed me somehow. I wasn’t thinking clearly. The flu was real, the collapse was real, and that was the best my exhausted brain could come up with. I regretted it the moment I started doing it. It ate me up inside. I wanted to explain it to you, but during most of the following year I worried that it would somehow surface. It kept me from sleeping. I finally decided it was buried, and I tried to tell you about it.”
“I remember,” I told her. “You started to explain to me that Connor had been accused of human trafficking but didn’t finish because House Ferrer shot a missile at your house.”
“Then there was the White case, and the Hyperion. There was always something. Then Alessandro happened.”
She glanced at Alessandro who was standing next to me, impassive.
“By that point I told Mom,” Nevada said. “I had to tell someone.”
“And I told her to keep it to herself,” Mom said.
I turned to her. “Why?”
“Because you had enough on your plate. I told her to wait. I had faith in you both. You would sort it out when you were in a better place.”
Nevada sighed. “I regret it, Catalina. But if I was back in that moment, knowing only what I knew then, I would do it again. It wasn’t a mistake. I did it deliberately because I wanted to protect you.”
“I know. I don’t view it as a mistake. It was a sacrifice, Nevada. I understand. I would have done the same.”
Tears wet Nevada’s eyes. Connor put his arm around her. “You got this.”
“Something occurred to me,” my big sister said. “At the start, you made a big deal about keeping the family separate from House Rogan. And then in February you made a one-eighty. I pulled your voting record in the Assembly. You always vote with Connor. You sit next to him in the chamber.”
“He’s my brother-in-law.”
“Oh, it’s more than that. I’ve been wondering for months why you made sure that everyone in Houston knew that our two houses are a package deal.”
“Why wouldn’t we want to be allied with House Rogan? They are powerful, dangerous, wealthy . . .”
Nevada smiled at me. “You tied us together. In the eyes of the public, we are impossible to separate. Victoria can no longer target House Rogan without dragging House Baylor down.”
I didn’t say anything. It didn’t seem like a reply was needed.
Nevada tried to get up off the chair and Connor gently helped her to her feet. She came over to me and hugged me.
“I love you so much,” Nevada said. “I know exactly what you’re doing because I did it too for the same reasons. But we can’t do this anymore. From now on, let’s talk. Let’s tell things to each other, because I can’t do it the other way. It tears me up inside and I know it’s hard on you. You have me and Connor, and Mom, and Arabella, and the boys . . .”
Heat built behind my eyes. I held on to her. My nephew kicked me.
“We love you. We will help you. Don’t repeat my mistakes.”
She held me for a few more seconds, then let me go. “I’ll see you in the morning.” She looked at Alessandro. “Do not hurt her.”
She walked away.
“We have some matters to discuss when things settle down,” Connor said. The Scourge of Mexico smiled at me and followed his wife.
Mom sighed, kissed my forehead, and left the kitchen.
It was just me and Alessandro.
“Family,” he said.
“Yeah.”
“I like yours better than mine.”
“Are you leaving?” I managed to keep the desperation out of my voice. I didn’t want him to leave. I wanted him to stay and hold me while I fell asleep.
A shadow crossed his face. “Do you want me to?”
“No. I want you to stay.”
We stood barely three feet away from each other but suddenly the distance gaped between us.
“Do you want to stay?” I asked.
“More than anything.”
“Then stay.”
He faced me. The muscles along his jaw locked.
“What is it?”
“When I said I don’t deserve you, I meant it. I can’t give you anything, except myself, Catalina.”
“That’s all I ever wanted. I already told you I don’t expect anything else.”
He opened his mouth and closed it without saying a word.
“Alessandro, I’ve had an awful day and you’re scaring me.”
The mask hiding his face dropped, torn. He wrapped his arms around me. “I’ve got you.”
“Come with me.”
He let me go and we walked down to my bedroom. He followed me in and raised his eyebrows at the wall of swords.
“Catalina, I like a good blade, but you might have a problem.”
“Do you like it?”
“I love it.”
“Good, because that’s where we’re sleeping tonight. In the morning, if you’re good, I’ll let you touch some of them.”
“Only some?”
I smiled at him. “We can negotiate.”
He grinned back. “I love negotiating. I can be very persuasive.”
I wrapped my arms around him and kissed him. He made my head spin. “So can I.”
The kiss ended and he looked at me, his eyes wild.
There were so many things to worry about. The Abyss, Cheryl, Runa outing me to my family and what Linus would do about it, and the distance that had yawned between us in the kitchen . . . I couldn’t deal with any of it right now.
Whatever it was that Alessandro was trying to find a way to tell me, it would wait until tomorrow. Tonight was ours and I wouldn’t trade it for anything.
